100%
JF you wish to be thought quite the littery gent, Never say "whole," but "100%," Never say "very," or "purely," or "quite," So banal, so common, so tame and so trite; When your pocket is empty, your money all spent, Say you are "broke 100%," When in gruelling labour your back has been bent, Say you are "done up 100%," When your shinbone has suffered a terrible dent, Say that it hurt you 100%, When you've fully explored every ham-
fet in Kent You’ve inspected that county 100%, When you stump up the fiver that you have been lent, Say you've repaid it 100%, When you say you've been cheated be sure that you meant That you misjudged the fellow 100%, When you've painfully cleared up arrears of your rent, You can say you're "financial 100%," When you fall on your foe with felonious intent, Threaten to "down him 100%," When the doctor steps in your demise to prevent, Ask him to cure you 100%-, When you finally go where your ancestors went, You'll prove to be mortal 100%; Don’t say "entirely," don’t say "completely," For 100% says it always more neatly And falls on the public ear ever more sweetly, 1
Arnold
Wall
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New Zealand Listener, Volume 14, Issue 345, 1 February 1946, Page 9
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205100% New Zealand Listener, Volume 14, Issue 345, 1 February 1946, Page 9
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Copyright in the work University Entrance by Janet Frame (credited as J.F., 22 March 1946, page 18), is owned by the Janet Frame Literary Trust. The National Library has been granted permission to digitise this article and make it available online as part of this digitised version of the New Zealand Listener. You can search, browse, and print this article for research and personal study only. Permission must be obtained from the Janet Frame Literary Trust for any other use.
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