DO YOU SAY GRACE?

New Zealand Listener, Volume 4, Issue 97, 2 May 1941, Page 7

DO YOU SAY GRACE?

(By

K.

S.

>. E always say grace before meals in our home. Many of our friends think this strange, because otherwise we observe few of the outward marks of religion, but right through my childhood my father always said grace, so when I got married I just automatically carried on. Nowadays, of course, young Richard thinks he is old enough to say it, and in his boyish voice he says the grace that I use, which is, exactly the same grace that my father said three times a day for over 30 years to my knowledge: " For what we are about to receive, may the Lord make us truly thankful. In Jesus name we ask it, Amen." Why do we do it? Frankly I don’t know-just habit I think. But we would never dream of starting a meal until grace has been said-and in fact I in- * sist on the children bowing their heads quietly and on Richard saying the words if not reverently, at least decently. I

think all this is odd myself, so I should not be surprised at anything others thought about it. * * * E have had some very amusing experiences over grace. Friends and relatives know of our habits, of course, but for strangers I usually explain that it is our custom and ask for silence for a moment. Sometimes this is met with the raised eyebrows of astonishment, and occasionally even complete ignorance of what I mean. Sometimes when we have a saintly visitor or a wealthy relative or someone like that to dinner, I have been unable at the crucial moment to remember the words-which makes it look as though the whole thing is a put-up job, Once, a business acquaintance remarked loudly at the conclusion: " You don’t often meet that sort of stunt these days, do you?" And he was right. Among all our friends grace before meat has died out as an institution. Our circle is roughly the lower professional class — lawyers, accountants, dentists, school teachers,

newspapermen, government clerks, and bank officials, and I am pretty positive that fone of the families says grace, except perhaps a few who are active Church members. I was in an amateur dramatic production once of Thornton Wilder’s "The Long Christmas Dinner." The whole of the action takes place round a Christmas dinner table, and the father of the family starts off by saying grace. When it came to rehearsing that play I found I was the: only member of the cast who knew the words of a grace. * * * IN the other hand, there are the folk who not only say grace but have some "stunt" of their own. One couple say it silently, ie. they bow their heads and close their eyes and presumably think the words, though how this is going to work out when their babies grow up a bit, I don’t know. Another family (I haven’t seen this) say they hold hands round the table while grace is being said. They say it is an old English custom. I also know a quiet home and a charming old couple where grace is a real institution. Not only is it very comprehensive and said in a low voice, but it is both preceded and followed by a lengthy period of silence. Not knowing when the silence was due to finish

troubled me at first, but now I think it is rather beautiful. We get few enough periods of contemplative hush in this life. * * * Perhaps all this is one reason why I rather like at 9 o’clock every night: "All stations are now standing by for the period of silent prayer during the chiming of Big Ben." The steady, unharried chimes of Big Ben coming through the night from warbattered London thrill me-a symbol of the majesty of Britain linked with quiet resolution. I have no faith in the God of Battles listening to and answering the prayer of unbelievers because we now find ourselves in a tight spot. In fact, I rather agree with Oscar Wilde (I think: it was) who said that prayer should not be answered because it then ceased to be prayer and becomes a correspondence. But the old Quaker custom of keeping silent appeals to me, Just as in our own little family we are none the worse for quietly bowing our heads before a meal, so I think the whole Dominion is all the better for stilling the racket in this manner for at least one period of the day, and perhaps (who knows) some quiet peace and comfort may steal into our hearts.