LISTENINGS

New Zealand Listener, Volume 4, Issue 84, 31 January 1941, Page 13

LISTENINGS

Perpetrated and illustrated by

KEN

ALEXANDER

LITTLE GERMANIACS|

N American journalist observes that whilst the older German people are listless and ‘depressed, German youth is still frantically enthusiastic about its Fuhrer. One splendid little fellow said, with shining eyes, that he would gladly kill his father if the Fuhrer willed it

Little girls become epileptic with joy and throw genuine fits of fervour when they listen into Adolf; which just shows what it is to have "IT." Such frenzied faith must upset the harmony of the domestic inglenook and cause listlessness and depression among the old folks at home. It is probable that when little German boys come home from Youth Rallies, with shining eyes, German fathers lock themselves in coal cellars until the shine goes out of their little boys’ eyes and Frau Snizzleblitz whispers to her herr: "Hasten, Wilhelm! Little Wolfgang’s eyes are _ shining again. In der kitchen he iss, complaining about der bluntness of der breadknife. I think our dear Fuhrer has proclaimed another father’s day. Little Wolfie so sensitive iss. Neffer will he feel like other boys until a black band he can wear round his hat. I wish some other hobby he would find. Patricide so untidy iss." "Ach!" says Wilhelm. "A pity it iss that our Fuhrer himself a father iss not mit leedle sons to stalk him mit bread-knives, What iss that thudding in der barlour?" "That iss leedle Grizelda listening to der radio. Der Fuhrer iss speaking. How der Fuhrer she loofs! She iss throwing fits all over der blace. And how she imbroves! A month ago a fit she could throw barely two yards; now der barlour too small iss for her. Her corkscrew spirals and swastika twists iss the envy of her class. So proud we should

be. She holds all school records for throwing der fits. But so hard it iss on der furniture. Hark! There goes der chandelier! As der great German boet, Herr Shakesbeare, says, "Youth mit age will mix it not." "Yes!" says Wilhelm. "He spoke a mouthful." "Ah, so nice it would be if you let little Wolfie express himself mit der bread-knife-just once! So ashamed iss he that our house der only one in der strasse iss mit a father. Every morning der boys say ‘How’s your father?’ Every morning poor Wolfgang says, ‘Quite well, thank you.’ An inferiority gomblex it giffs him. He gomblains. ‘Why does father avoid me so. He thinks not of my future.’ What shall we say, Wilhelm, when der Gestapo calls and asks, ‘Herr Snizzleblitz, he iss alive and well, hein?’ And when Wolfgang’s great day comes and der Fuhrer asks, ‘This boy, of course, his father hass killed?’ Wolfgang his head can only hang and answer, ‘Alas, mein Fuhrer! He iss a _ poor father but a good runner.’ Give der boy his chance, Wilhelm; never will you live to regret it."