LISTENINGS

New Zealand Listener, Volume 3, Issue 72, 8 November 1940, Page 14

LISTENINGS

Perpetrated and illustrated by

KEN

ALEXANDER

PEACE WITHOUT HONOUR

VER the air comes the suspicion that Hitler, using France as a snare, will try to scare John Bull into a patched-up peace. The bunco artist of Berlin is in a jam and must back-pedal to get his thumb out of the wringer. Says Hitler: "Look here, Goering! What did we do ‘with that Fraulein Peace? I’ve

been in such a jam that I haven’t had time to think of honeys. But now-" "Yeah," answers Goering. "I’ve been sort of up to my neck in it myself, what with one thing and another toppling down in Berlin. Himmler may know something about the dame. He could probably beat her up, anyway. Let’s ring Goebbels, he’s a bit of a stage-door-mouse-the little squirt!" "Ts that you, Goebbels? Adolf speaking. Look here! Have you seen Fraulein Peace about lately? You know--sort. of ‘soppy-looking Jeane with a seagull or a vulture or something on her wrist — non-Aryan, I think, You don’t like ’em soppy? I don’t care how you like ’em -this is business, not pleasure, What’s thet? You think she was run over by a tank? Well, I’ll ring Himmler." "Yes, this is the Gestapo -- Himmler speaking (say-lay off the home-lessons for a moment, boys. I can’t hear myself shriek). Peace, Peace? I seem to know the name but I can’t recall the face. You know how faces change here. Tu ask thé boys; they do a lot of knocking about." _ "Look here, boys," seys Himmler, "have you noticed a bit of fluff -- name o’ Peace or something? Adolf’s got a sudden pash on her. I never saw such a fellow for changing his skirts, First it’s Justice, then Self-determination, and now Peace." © * * * "A party of the boys to see you, mein Fuhrer! Looks like there’s been an-er-eaccident. Lay the stretcher on the table, boys." | ‘What's this?" says Hitler, "It’s Peace," answers Himmler. "Sort of run down, you might say. Me and

the boys have been coaching her in the glorious ideals of the German nation. We kind of disagreed on fundamentals and-well, you know how it is-boys will be boys. She’s kind of patched up." "Patched up?" She’s tatters," shouts Hitler, "And just when I’ve arranged for Laval to take her on tour in ‘Peace With Honour,’ " * * * "Well, what do you know about that! Peace has gone and bumped herself off," says Himmler. "She might have let us do it."

"That’s torn it," says Hitler. "Now we'll just have to stage "If Winter Comes," and if there’s any play that leaves me cold-especially in the feetit’s ‘If Winter Comes’ ". ,