HOW LONG THEY'VE BEEN MARRIED.

Digger (Invercargill RSA), Issue 28, 24 September 1920, Page 4

HOW LONG THEY'VE BEEN MARRIED.

Hayward Bartlett.

(A Base Attempt at an Approximate Chronology). If he wants her to read aloud and she will— one year. If she tries to make him go out alone in the evening, but he just won't — under six months. * If she . tries to make him stay home in the evening and he positively won't — five years. If he talks shop and she listens — under six months. If he says that her mother is an "old darling" and her father a "brick** — one week. If she says that she would like to know hig family better — one week. If he insists that a friend come out home to meet the "best little woman in the world" — one month. And then if-he says, "No, no ; I won't bother to 'phone. The little woman in bother to 'phone. The little lady will be tickled to death to see us"— one month or less. If she says that she would like to go through that fascinating factory of his — If she actually goes — one month. If he is perfectly contented to sit right home by the fire — under one year or over ten. If she is perfectly contented as above — under one month. If she is wholly satisfied that the man she fell in love with is the man she married — a couple of weeks. If they play golf together, the full eighteen holes, and arrive at the clubhouse smiling — scandal ; they aren't mar-

ried at all.