SCHOOLROOM HUMOUR.

Digger (Invercargill RSA), Issue 21, 6 August 1920, Page 15

SCHOOLROOM HUMOUR.

The life of a schoolm'aster — particularly that of a country schoolmaster — is ever full of incidents of a morexjr less humprou.s character, oue of the chief mediums being the numerous notes which fond parents so love to pen. Those related below are culled from a huge collectioii of sucl. relics gathered by one whose whole life has been spent in the training, of the young idea. "Please exeuse William Henry for being absent from school this morning as we had strained r,elations. I was two busy to get him ready as I had too twins, hut it sharn't occur again. You have feeling and you know what it is." "Don't set John those head-aching sums because he can't do them and it keeps us away from the picture shows. The last lot you set him about 'if a man v alks ten miles in an hour how soon would he walk to Lundon' caused his farther to be off work for three days and when he'd walked it to see what the answer war, y> i said it war wrong. I'd like to s^fr* you walk it. Please don't do it again." "What do you mean by saying my children's heads hain't clean? There as clean as yourn and don't yer fergit it. knew yer mother afore she married Jac!. Robinson, and iverybody said he'd finc his mistake after fust week. Remember you'vo sprung up from nothin'. I'd like to look in your head to see if it's clear- as theirn." "1 must ask you not to put please wrong ideas into my Jane's head because her father's a Socialist and he knows what's what and what he don't know wLat's what isn't worth knowing. I'd like yer to know that the chief aim of us is for all to have two houses apice — -oue to live in and one to let. Webring Jane up according to our own ideas, understand us, and we don't want you to put false ideas in her head because you hav'n't one."