Passing Notes.

Digger (Invercargill RSA), Issue 13, 11 June 1920, Page 6

Passing Notes.

BY JACQUES.

Laugh where we must, he candid where wo can. — Pope.

R.ANDOM REFLECnO N S. To know all is to forgive all. Intimidation plays a big part in society under the name of respectability. The abuse of power proclaims the weakling. Those who never do more than they are paid for, never get paid for more than they do. I know a man who never lied to his wife. He was a bachelor. The way of the transgressor is hard — on the rest® of us. Life consists of two things— wishing you hadn't if you did, and wishing you had if you didn't. An argument with a woman is ofteri opened by mistake. A FEW DE-FINITIONS. Love — Mad n ess. Courtship — Oladness. Marriage — Sadness. Faith — Belief in what we know is rot, Charity-- -An exceHent advertisement. Memory — Tlie fauulty which enables us to remernber wliat we ought to forget. Curiosity — A feeling inspired by things that are none of our business. Flattery — Praise of other people. Glut-ton — A full grown man who can eat nearly as much as a boy. Pleasure — Anytliing we can't afford. Martyr — A man who lives up to his wife's expectations of him. Food pric.es rise beyond belief, And apprehensive fears awaken ; Tliat if it's rash to purchase beef, It's even rasher to buy bacon. It is quite common to see placards attached to perambulators bearing the notice, "Please do not kiss the baby. " — London correspondent to a northern paper. You had bctter kiss the m other, The learned doctors say ; Infection to the little one By this you miglit convey. If you respect that science which Pathology is styled ; You had better kiss the mother, Let the mother kiss tho child. There is nothi.ng like a good scare to test the strength of our convictions. Time was when almost every other man in Invercargill openly proclaimed his antagonism to vaccination. That was when we had no smallpox, and when there seemed little likelihood of it coming. But the unexpected has happened, as usual. We liave had quite a number of cases of smallpox (though we for a time disguised it with fancy names), and now Dr McCaw is overworked, and those who declaimed most loudly against vaccination carefully keep their left arm away from your possible friendly smack of greeting, while on every hand we hear murmurs about "A proper regard for the public safety," etc. Smallpox, like conscience, makes cowards of us all. For my own part- I frankly confess that I got Dr McCaw to decorate my left arm the other evening. It "t-ook" beautifully, and, as a result, my temper is in a sadly frayed jcondition just at present. By the way, can anyone tell why the doctors almost invariably choose tlie let t arm to opo r ate on Not always, though, as the foUovnng story will show. During an epidemic of smallpox a music liall artist-C, who was very proud of lier shapely limhs, and who had gained considerable notoriety through the scantiness of her stage attire, called on a doctor with a view to being vaccinated. Slie insistcd, liowever, tliat the operation should be performed in such a wa.y as to leave no mark visible to lier nightly admirers. M ell, to make sure on that point," said ihe doctor, "I liad better first see you in your stage get-up." The lady agreed to give him a sort of private rehearsal — her usual uiidress affair. At its conclusion the medico said, "WeH, if you really want protection, but do not want any niarks visible— well, all I ca.n suggest is that you swallow tho lymph." Tlie daily papers have been telling us of a man up north who bought and sold three iarms inside of twelve months, net-

ting £12,000 from the deals. And J,[r Massey says he has no evidence of pi0. fiteering in land ! A PARABLE. In a far country, the name wliereo[ ' being Godzond, great tribulation fell npot ; the people by reason of a plague, whici, in the language of that country, was called the profiteer. And they rose and went to ■ their rulers, saying : "Deliver us, we pra.j I you, from this evil, which eateth up 0UI | substance, and maketh a quidlet to look like a picture of nothing. Ihe H.C.L, (which, being interpreted, meaneth hellish prices), troubleth us, and our eyes perceivs I things to be exceedingly umptido. We be. seech you, oh ma-sters, to help us." And i the rulers answered, saying: "Depart in peace; we shall dummix the profiteer until he looketh meaner than twopence ij coppers." But when the people, had gore away rejoicing the rulers winked the other eye at each other, saying : "What meai these foolish people ? Lo ! the profiteer i our father and our brother, and our cousm ar.d our son; he is also ourselves. SkaD we, then, hearken to the rabble, and sever our own jugulars ? No dam fear!" Then spake-one who was full of years and guile, and said : ' 'These ye speak of are our friends; they also commaud manv vofes. The Lord forbid tliat we should lav hands on them. But there be others, smaller fry, who live not in our street, neither have they many votes. They are sellers cf Mellin's Food, Vas-el-in, ancl sucli smal! things in the market place, and they sometimes rat the people, yea, even to the extent of a tanner. Verily, we will shake the tar out of some of them. And tbe people will bless us and forget about our friends who have great dealings in wool, . and hides, and land, and the flesh of sheep j and beeves." And lo ! it came to pass as ] he said. They gave the poor seller of ' goods a taste of hell; but the rich man they laid on velvet. And the people (who are sometimes called also mugs).. seeing only part of this said : "\fyise aud great and good are our rulers," and they blessed them and went on paying through "ihe nose for their scran, raiment, and otlier things. Moral : Well take your choice of a dozen. Perhaps the most mistaken and regrettable strike that New Zealand has yet seen was that entered into by tho Auckland tramway workers on behalf of the jowxeys. Their assisLriice was not solicited, so far as we can learn, and their action was made ridiculous by the fact that those for whom they were iighting took no part themselves in the siruggle. It simply looks a.s though the tramwayrnen were conscious of their "giant's strength," and tyrannously resolved to "use it like a giant," not against the liorse-ownera or racing clubs, but against the geoeml I public — with whom there was no quairel. In ali&nating public sympatliy, as they have undoubtedly done by their ill-advised bludgeoning of those who were' altogether innocent of any part in the trouble between the jockeys and owners. they have weakened any case, however just, they may themselves have in the future. Nt strike has any chance of success- withont J measure of public goodwill, and this tbe fl tramwayrnen haye gone a long way 1"' j wards forfeiting by their intemperate . action in the present iristanoe. They 'ir6 I badly beaten — how could it be otherwise? And, ip a-ddition to loss of time atd money, have made themselves the laugh' ing stock of the Dominion — to the regret r of all true sympathisers with Labour' legitimate aspirations.