Passing Notes.

Digger (Invercargill RSA), Issue 12, 4 June 1920, Page 6

Passing Notes.

BY JACQUES.

Laugh where we must, be candid where we can. — Pope.

"To b© chaste is to be happy"— Maybe so, but yesterday, When chased a mile by Murphy's bull I didn't feel too gay. Tbe "News" is bewailing the iniquity of minority rule in this so-called democratic community, and ascribes the present anomalous state of things political to Labour's defection from the old LiberalLalxiur alliance. Which makes very nice reading— only it is not true. The defeatof the Liberals was due to a number of causes, of which Labour's bid for independent representation was only one. (Labour, for instance, had no direct part in Sir Joseph's own deposition; the P.P.A. saw to that. ) In so far as the LiberalLabour split was responsible, the Libera! party has only itself to blame. Time was when a healthy Liberal-Lahour alliance smashed the forces of reaction, and achieved wonders through such men as Ballance and Seddon. But the successors of those giants, feeling secure in their position, kicked away the ladder by which they had climbed to power. And, in the years that followed, they fought Labour just as vieiouslv as did the Reformers. Now that they are badly licked they whimperingly blame Labour for taking the only course that the opposition of both other parties had left them. And even at last elections the word "Bolsheviem," as comioting the Labour policy, was as much in their mouth's as in those of the Masseyites. A dirty weapon to use, truly. "But," will say the "News," "the term had application only to the extreme section of Labour, represented by Harry Holland and Co. ^7e said nothing against sane Labour." Well, the implication was against all Labour that struck out on independent lines ; the only ' 'sane' ' Labour, in the eyes of the "News," was that which voted for the Liberal party. For my own part, I would like to see a reunion between Labour and the more progressive elements ef the Liberal party, but since the Liberals broke the alliance, it is for them to first utter the reconciling "God bless you," like the old — — . But that is another story, and since it was told by dear old Oliver Goldsmith, it is old eriougli to be new again. The bickerings of an old bass fiddler and his wife had grown more and more frequent, until, at last, they culminated in a quarrel so violent that both vowed never to speak to, or sleep with, each other again. The first resolve was all right, but wha-t to do about the latter was a problem, since there was only one bed in the house. At length, however, the fertile brain of the fiddler solved the difficulty. He placed the long fiddle case at night be- j tween himself and his wife, and thus they ; slept for months, "so near, and yet so far." Each had leamed to regret the hasty words, and each longed for reconciliation, but neither would make the first advances. One night, however, the old fellow sneezed, and the old woman, from force of habit (following the custom of those parts) ejaculated, "God bless you!" "Eh, wife, d'ye mean that " said the old man. "Aye, John, that I do," answered his wife. "If that is so," said John, "to h 11 with the fiddle case !" and out it went on tho fioor. 'Tis strange how opposites agree- — Extrernes together run ; Thus in a "funeral," we see, There's always "rea! fun." Some little time ago the Survey Department advertised for a married couple. Among the applicants for the position was a young returned soldier, who, in due time received a reply settiug forth the duties required, and winding hp with the proviso that the woman must have no family, "or any expectations of such." No expectations of a family in a young, healthy married woman ! The Department would be well advised to procure an octogenarian couple from, say, Lorne Farm, and even then— well you never can tell. It is hard to sa,y at wha-t age women give up these

•*r -"?*• -,r 1- -r- f f -r- v- ^ £ expectations. Anyhow, what about Wj. couraging the birth rate ? Pope says: "Whatever is, is right* I take a different view; My wife cleared home to ma to-night-She's left, and I'm left too. Another inhibition — this time of thj publication of the places our racehorses hold in public favour, as shown by tote backings. Lordy, Lordy ! Wben aad where is this pin-pricking, irritatiug meddling with our reasonable liberties going to end ? Tho anti-liquor, antigambling, anti-tobacco, anti-freedorn-ii). any-form leagues seem bent on making this country so like Heaven that it will soon not be fit for a rational, red-blooded mai: to live in. Why do not the sportsmen retaliate by protesting against the publication of the names of winners in cliurch bazaar lotteries — a form of gambling, by the way, infinitely more dishonest than any racecourse betting can be, if oue compares the value of the prizes with the total investments ? "Under pressure from wealthy Wsmess members of the House of Commous tbe British Cabinet has abandoned the proposed tax on war fortunes." We bad read much about Coats' cotton profits, the "stand and deliver" of the shipping combines, the several hundred per cent. of the textile kings, and so on, and we wondered why some few thousands of these thieves were not hanged as high as Haman. But here we have the explanation, as simple as A.B.C. The profiteer sits in our high places, and makes our laws, and he is by no means suicidally inclined. And it is probably — almost certainly— the same here, else how can we account for the impunity with which some most glaring forms of profiteering are carried on ? A wrathful Government visits its vengeance on a luckless grocer who charges an extra sixpence for a patentfood, but it has a blind eye for the staggering discrepancy between the cost of ra.w wool and the price of finished tweed, even after making most liberal allowanee for increased cost of manufacturing. Mr Massey tells us he is hent on smasbing the profiteer — and we believe hip ! Well, doesn't Mr Chesterton say somewhere that "we are marvellcus mugs." Count Okuma has heen giviug his opim ion — which, presumably, reflects tbat oi the whole Japanese people — of the Americans and their policy in language unusually forcible and candid for a diplomat. He resents the American charge that Japan is ; "the Prussia of the East," and retaliates ; by declaring American ambitions to he ® i a parity writh those once held by Germauj. and which were so narrowly forestalled. | Possibly both axe right. Each aims a' commercial and political dominatior, in Pacific (if nothing more), and "two of a trade can never agree." America has made no secret of her hostility to her rival, and to-day, judging by the intensely anti Japanese utterances of her statcsnien, an" the t-one of her public press, she see®* | more intent than ever on removing ar,i possible misconceptions of Japan on t head. The Japs, on the other hand, for long time cautious and concihatory j they are at last beginning to "talk h in a tone that bodes ill for the dreams ( the League of Nationists. In the aMM and ambitions of these rival Povvers, ^ | the mutua.1 hatred of the two people, ^ j in the confidence of each in lfs strength, we have all the elements , sary for another world-staggeri'1." - flict. Any moment may see the uphe ^ and he would be a daring prophe would venture to predict the limits ^ consequences. The opinion oi r;K '( one thoughtful writer is that a between Japan and America 111 1 0; develop into an inter-continenta^^ ^ even greater magnitude and °rr that which has so recently s a ^ world. If the possibility beconie^ " ality,' and the Cancasian is P| the black and yellow hordes o will be the position of Eng a of her alliance with Japan .