DIGGER YARNS.

Digger (Invercargill RSA), Issue 9, 14 May 1920, Page 14

DIGGER YARNS.

(rom the "Sydney Mail").

ABOUT GENERAL BIRDWOOD.

It happened at Freecourt in 1916, when Birdie was distributing medals (not those that came up with the rations), and, as he always did after dishing these out, he sprang a snifter on us, ending his speech up like this: — "Well, jads, at last 1'm moving you all out of range in Ihe course of a few days, to a more suitable place." We cheered him continuously for many minutes. Mick Strafford or "Wenna Abdul Mahomed Esma" as we nicknamed hira, the battalion's comedian, put it round the mob that down at the base vvhite shirts, tunics, and helmets, were being issued and we were . relieving Light Horse in "Gippo." Everyone did away with un -necessary clothing. We were uigh nude, pr.eparing for Gippo land. Three days later the C.O. told us to pack up, as we were leaving the country, as Gensral Birdwood had told us. We started at- 3 a.m. one wet, cold morning, and next night brought us into Belgium, and they took us straight into the "business." Birdie came round later and asked how we liked our new country. A voice : "I suppose you got another feather and fiew here !" General Birdwood said once that "he didn't quite> remember it," but still — A ■ Digger on tho Peninsula was having a general clean-up — wash, shave, bath — all i in a pannildn of water. Birdie watched 1dm curiously. "What! Having a hit of a wash, are you?" 5 Digger glances slowly and disgustedly j around to eye his questioner, then turns slowly back to his pannildn. "Yers, I am, an' I wish I wuz a bloomin" canary!" It was in the bad, wet days of the Somme, and the Fourth Division was "resting" behind Albert. Birdie! was dong an inspection of our battalion, and in response to his usual question re complaints a Digger mentioned bread. Birdie : "Of course, you know, my men, you must realise that you cannot expect tho same quantity now as you had in prewar days." Digger: "Wre don't mind the shortage so much, and are quite used to dividing a loaf between six or eight of us, but the quality is what we complain of." Birdie : "Of course, my man, you must realise that the same ingredients are not now available." Digger: "The ingTedieuts are quite O.K." Birdie: "Could you do any better? What are you in civil life?" Digger: "Yes. I am a master baker." Birdie: "Well, what would you suggest as an improvement?" Digger : "Give the baker at Rouen a bar to his Military Cross." General birdwood (to Colonel): "Colonel, I i; er see men look so downcast as yours - o." Colonel : "Yes, sir ; the A.A.M.S. sli , ed off the duek-board last night and br. e his leg." General Birdwood : "Was > liked so much?" Colonel: "Well, it's h, 1 to say; but he broke the rum jar and i T the issu.e." In an advam.-e when the Aussies were being liard-pushed General Birdwood uecided on a cliarge. Turning roimd to the men he said, "Now lads, let the enemy se* what we are made of. Let us do or die." One Digger about-turncd and ran for his life. The General called him back ancl asked, "What do you mean by running away. I said '.let us do or die!' " Tho Digger replied, "Beg pardon, sir; I thought you said 'let us do a guy,' " General Birdwood, although heart and soul with the boys, always deinanded the respect due to him as O.C. of Australian ttoops. On one oceasion, whilst passing along tne rear of the lines, he came across one of the reinforcements who had lately joined our battalion. It was a wet day, and the General was wearing a rain cape over hig uniform and the red-braided eap worn by stafi officers. The newly-axrived Digger did not know the General, and passed him without the salute. The Genera: turned and called him back. "Don't jou know who I am?" he demanded. ''No," came the abrupt reply. "Well, I m General Brrdwood. Why did you not salate me?" "Why, blime, I thought you was oaa of Shem Salvaiion Ai-iny blokes."