“PROFESSORS” – BANKRUPTCY

Waikato Times, Volume 121, Issue 20266, 7 August 1937, Page 16 (Supplement)

“PROFESSORS” - BANKRUPTCY

Astrologer and His Periscope. Stars Failed Him in Business.

"Men want to know about business; dromon’s questions are generally founded on Jealousy.” Mr Dudley Norman Vlze, otherwise Lionel Johnson, “professor” of astromgy and former vacuum-cleaner salesman, thus described his experlWice shortly after his public examination at London Bankruptcy Court. Known as Professor Ezlve, he plaoed & order for 100,000 periscopes for Coronation of King - Edwards VTTT., found that his stars failed him, and In court told Mr Melville Clarke, Asflstant Official Deceiver, that he had liabilities of £2006 with assets of £22. kn February. 1036, he started bustness In New Bond Street as Professor Ezlve, printing and selling horoscopes. Later he established the Regent Manufacturing Company, Import and export merchants, and soon after agreed to market a collapsible periscope for the Inventor. When he had sold 4500, for £IBO, the manufacturers obtained two Judgments against him for a total of and the bankruptcy proceedings ensued. “Easily Learned.” Mr Registrar Parton yesterday closed the examination, and later Mr Vlze

ON THE HOME FRONT. Wife: Call yourself a Husband!! SVI.y, >ou can’t even keep me m j Hothes. Husband: Well I hough! you a homo, and 1 can't keep you in that either.

; told me: •'*" “Astrology IS: something.;which can ■ bo learned hv anyone.. . I learned it to e start, with three years ago from text- - books, but I was assisted by a <knowr ledge of psychology which I first - studied to assist, rne in salesmanship. - 1 ‘‘People imagine astrologers- can : foretell anything. I have had letters d from people asking me whether they r should Invest money In ainibber plantation In Ceylon or a motor-manufao-n turlng concern In the Midlands. "Astrology Is not a*n exact science; d it claims only to show people the ln- !. fluenoes which their lives from - the moment they are born, r i , i “Right In the End.” “I admit that over the periscopes I p myself did not quite see how things would turn out, but by first opinion | was proved right In the end. ) ' “I foresaw what a ready sale they / I could have. 5 : “It was Ironical to sec how those i very periscopes sold on May iU. But It was too late to help me. “Now T am going to continue with Imy astrology. I know what are the d limitations of Professor Ezlve, and I e shall not tempt fate.”

POPULAR. Marine: Sav. will you loan me twopence? I want lo call a friend on the elephone. Sailor: Here’s sixpence. Gull al your friends.

t WHEN HE’S FLAT? o 0 Tourist (paying his bill) : Well, I’m square now. Hotel Manager: Yes, sir, and T hope = you will be ’round again very shortly. OUTNUMBERED. e "Many a wise word is spoken in .jest.” 11 “Yes. but they* can’t compare with the number of foolish ones that are

ENGAGEMENT RENEWED. / She: Now that our engagement Is ended, I suppose we should return I each other’s letters? He: I suppose so. And while we are about it, why not return each other’s kisses? ONE GOOD TURN . “Yes, I will give you the hand of my eldest daughter, but you might Just recommend my other daughters 1 to your friends.”