A TRIP TO THE ISLE OF MAN.

Waikato Times, Volume XXXI, Issue 2519, 1 September 1888, Page 1 (Supplement)

A TRIP TO THE ISLE OF MAN.

CHAPTER ll,—Continued. When we got there, it appeared to be about half tide, but whether ebbing or flowing wo could not tell. There were two clusters of bathing machines at a distance of about 100 yards from each other, the one farthest removed from us being, we were told, for the accomodation of ladies. We could see that a few of the machines at either place, were in the water, the rest being drawn up to high water mark. A stout woman was standing knitting near to what looked' like a large sized bathing machine without wheels. We guessed it to be a woman from her occupation, and from the fact that she wore petticoats ; but she also had on a rough sort of pilot coat, and a hat known as a sow-wester ; her features were large, and her face was tanned by the sun and sea breezes to a sort of brick colour. She accosted us in a rough voice, more 'n accordance with the hat and coat, than the petticoats and occpalion ; and wished to know if we were for a bath. I said, "yes," and she then shouted to a boy on horseback, who was dragging up one of the bathing machines from the water, and. whilst he was coming, she informed us that the < price for the accimnodation wai Is ; then going to the machine without wheels before alluded to ; she opened a door, and took from it two bundles, and handed one to each of us ;at the same time pointing out the two machines which we were to take. I got into the one indicated, and the boy, who had now come up, speedily hooked on the horse, and I commenced my descent towards the sen. The machine into which I had got wae a ricketty affair, and shook and rattled a good deal, though the sand was hard and tolerably smooth, being left in ripples or waves by the..retiring.,tide. ,It had a small looking-glass nailed by its wooden frame to bhe side, four iron pegs for hanging up one's clothes,, and a bench on the side opposite to the looking-glass. I closed the door, which fastened with a , largo wooden button, and, began to undress. Soon I heard the splash of water, and knew that we had entered the tide. In a little while the machine stopped, and I heard, the horse go splashing back to fetch Walter. ■ I was soon undressed, and having put on a pair of what the French call calcons, which Itound insifle the towel that had been given me, I opened the door, and looked out. The-water was scarcely a foot deep, so I concluded the tide was flowing; for had it been going out, the machine would have been high and dry in less than half an hour. I got down the steps and found the water colder than I had expected ; then turning my head, I saw the boy "bringing another of these contrivances down, which I rightly supposed contained Walter. X then waded out a few steps, and threw myself down so as to get my whole body immersed. By this time Walter's machine had come to a stand alongside my own, and presently I ; saw him open the door, and stretchout oue foot so as just to touch the water. ''Isnlt it beastly cold, he said. " Oh; you won't feel it cold when you have once been overhead," I replied. He walked down the steps, and made a sort of plunge as I had done, and then we botli struck out for n swim. After swimming about a hundred yards I said, "It will be considerably out of our depth here. I think we had better not go any farther. Besides I begin to feel chilly, and shall go back." "All right," he replied. "I shall have my shilling's worth now I am here,", aud he continued to swim on. When I reached the machine I looked, and saw that Walter had turned, and was coming towards me ; so I shouted to tho boy to come and fetch me. I got into the machine and commenced a vigorous rubbing with the towel. When I had continued this exercise for a little time I lost the chilly feeling, and felt a warm glow all over my body. I now heard the horse, and presently the boy shouted, inquiringly, "All right 1" " All right," I said, and sat down, as I knew there would be a jerk when the horse started. I could not get on very well with dressing while, the machine was in motion, but did. the best I could; and in a short time it came to a stop ; I got on my clothes and came out. Walter's machine was at this time only just emerging from thewater, bo Istrolled. about till he should come up, and finish dressing. In about ten minutes his door opened, and he came out, looking, I noticed, very ill-tempered. He had a wet bundle in his hand, and had buttoned his coat up to the throat. " Come on," he said, "I don t want to stop here to be laughed at." "Why, what's been the matter,' I asked. " Didn't you see then, he said. " See I no! what has happened ? " Here he burst into a laugb. "I don't wonder at them grinning," he aaid, "I should have done the same if it had happened to anyone elee." "Why, what on earth, have you been up to?" I asked. . : , '.' I'll tell you all about it," he said. When I jrot to the beastly, machine, I, shouted to that imp on horseback to come and fetch toe,.and, the devil doubt him, be did.come. . I heard.the horsesplashing in the water, and thought I should just nave time to get my ehirt on before he hooked on to the machine. I had got my head into it, and one of my arms, when he shouted "All right," and before the words were well out of his mouth, off the horse started, and pitched me head first against .the door. The blamed riokity old thing flew open, and out I went like a load of bricks from a tip dray into the water. It's a good job the water was there, or I should have been broken into several pieces, I believe., Well, of course, the infernal young villain must have heard the crash; but on he went just as if nothing had happened, and by the time I had assumed the perpendicular, and got the water out of my eyes, the cussed thing was fifty, yards off. I shouted; but he took no notice, till some other fellows (who saw my predicament, and were laughing fit to eplit themselves) shouted too ; and then he stopped. Well, I waded and scrambled through the water as fast as I could : the people screaming and yelling with laughter, till I got to the busted'machine, and then the confounded door wouldn't shut; at least, it wouldn't keep shut, so I had to hold on to it with one hand, and dress with the other. That's not all. When the machine had come to a stand (I was in a towering rage I can tell you, and should have liked to brain that little miscreant) I was pulling on my breeches. I had got my feet through the legs, and as I was giving them a tug to get them properly on, I stood up rather suddenly, and bang went my head against the top of the dprned dog-kennel. I know I lifted the roof off, because I saw the daylight above the side. Well, that blow was a crusher ! it took all the fight out of me. I aint't sure now whether it hasn't driven in a piece of the top of my skull. I expect I shall have to be trepanned; and wear a silver plate in the top'of my cranium; and yet T don't know,"

Here he took off his hat, and put his hand up to his head. "By George," he said, " there's a bnmp there that would give a phrenologist an erroneous impression of my character. I have got an organ of veneration at the present moment, sufficient for all the parsons in Douglas. Never had such a sneezer of a smash before. I saw forked lightning and heard the roll of thunder. It seemed as though it was five minutes to 12 o'clock of the last day. I must get home, and hold a consultation about this. I want to know whether my entire proof has gone or only a tile or two. Anyhow, I'm glad I smashed tho machine, the door's off and the top's loose, and half a kick would knock the whole concern to flinders." I remembered now having heard shouting and laughter whilst I was dressing, but, of course, did not dream that my friend was the cause of the hilarity. I told him this, and he said—"By Jove I should think you did, there was a regular cr&wd laughing , themselves into fits : ladies too, some of them holding their parasols so as partially to obscure the vision ; whilst others fairly turned their backs, unable to faoe tho sight of a man dressed in the fashion that prevailed in the Garden of Eden before the fall; I dare say I should have thought it pretty good fun myself, if I had been a spectator, instead of the principal nctor in the drama. Well that's the last time I ever enter one of those infernal machines." I now asked him what he had got in his hand ? " Why !my ehirt," he said. " When I pitched out of the machine, I had got the confounded thing half on, and could not get my arras free; so I was almost helpless in the water: I was jerked cut Bo suddenly that I had swallowed about a pint of sea water before I knew what had happened : beastly stuff it is too, it has taken away all my appetite for breakfast, and I can fuel it working in my internals like a dose of phyiflc. Don't Bay a word to the Kirls about it, or that Sarah will be pitching into me with her sly chuffing manner ; looking demure enough on the surface, but convulsed with laughter internally, like a pent up volcano." "All right," leaid : "I can say that I enjoyed myself very much, and eay so truthfully." "Can you?" he replied: "then you ought to bo ashamed to own it; why, if you had the smallest feeling of friendship for me, you would go back, drag that machine Post Boy from his horse, and pound him to a jelly. I should have liked to have done it myself, but I thought I should get the life chaffed out of me if I stopped." I endeavoured to explain that what I meant was, that my own bath had been an enjoyable one, but that I was, of course, very sorry for hie mishap. " VVell" he said, " I dare say I shall survive it, but would'nt I like to meet that young joker by moonlight alone; he tvould'nt think he had got much the best of the joke, when I had done with him." By this time we had got to our lodgings, and on entering I saw Bella in her usual place, behind the counter. She had not got on the muslin dress, but looked even prettier, I thought, in the close-fitting cotton print she wore. She smiled as we entered, and hoped we had enjoyed our bath. " Very;inucli, indeed," I replied ; but Walter made a grimace, and said he thought getting up to bathe before breakfast was, to say the least of it, a mistake. She, seeing him buttoned up to the chin, thought, I suppose, that he was cold, and said, "I expect you have been in the water too long. You should just take a clip or two, and then come out." "Yes," he replied ; "I certaiuly had one dip too many." He looked so comical when he said this that I could not help laughing. He laughed also, but walked out of the shop and went upstairs without further explanation, and as he had asked me to say nothing of his mishap, I followed, leaving Bella, I doubt not, somewhat puzzled to account for our strange conduct. We just gave a look into the sittingroom before going to dress, and found the. tablecloth ready laid for breakfast. Whilst dressing I noticed that Walter seemed to use the comb and brush with the utmost care and gentleness, but he made no further remark, and in a few minutes. we returned to the sitting room. (To lie continued).