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Waikato Times, Volume XXX, Issue 2417, 7 January 1888, Page 2 (Supplement)

A I'L'csliytcrian clergyman was asked recently if lie thought dancing a sin. "Yes," responded the worthy rector; "yes, a great sin—if you dou't dance well." A KETcuKiJ sclioolmistcr excuses his pasKion forang'ling by sayiuir that from oonstiint habit, lie never feels quite himself unless he is handing , tho rod, "Mr. Tiiomi'sox," said tho tailor mooting him, "can you let, me have my bill; Certainly replied Thompson, pulling , out the bill;'luit dou't keep it long; I may forget what is the amount." Tom Anjeguy has trouble in meeting his hills. Tα a pressing creditor he said, 'I can't pay you anything this month." " That's what you told mo. last month.' Well, I kept my word, did'nt I V Hun mother: ' He's a brute, rny clear, but dou't cry, 1 gave you to him because ho said ho knew tho secret of making you happy.' Daughter: ' Well, he's kept his secret admirably.'—French Fun. Chixeku Suxday School—Teacher (reading): '"And Elijah the prophet ' Doyou know what prophet means? Scholar Yes, mo know velly well.' Teacher (surprised) ;'Do you? Well, what is it?' 'Mo buy sing ft" cent., sell 15 cent., plofit 10 cent.' Rev. Dr. Torsoy states that ho can marry a couple in eighty seconds, and it is awful to think so much damage can be done in such a brief tiini;. It 5S a strange tiling to hear actors at an hotel complain about the Hies, when all people know that they are never so much at home as when among thom. A lady, noav London, in a suburban parish, was worried by frequont calls from a euynto who paid absurdly long visits and prattled by tha hour about her soul. She complained to hey husband of the nuisance. ' Shock liiui; ' was tho husband's advice ' put tho whiokoy bottle <-m tho table and offer him my tobacco " Hho did as ho and then, instead of coming only twice a week he took to callinf; overy dayThere may coino a timo, says an American paper, when, everything bad of Brighma Young will bo forgotten, and he will be remembered as the groat philanthropist who buried twouty-soveii mothers-in-law in a dozun years. Life insurance agents are generally cursed by all anil sundry, but, says the Wanganui Herald, the Porirua blacksmith seems to have as good a reason as anyone for his dislike to tho whole tribe. Ho says :—" You know, sir, I was once ciiiaagod to a young girl, and one of those life insurance agents persuaded her not to marry unless her husband's life was insured. AVell, ho eatr.o to me, and 1 insured for .-G3GO. AVell, what do you think ho did ? He went to my rival and ijc.i; iiiro to insure for £500, and the girl married him. I hato those agents, that 1 do."