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Waikato Times, Volume XXVIII, Issue 2304, 16 April 1887, Page 2 (Supplement)

A SAIU)H, while explaining the third figure of the quadrille to his messmate, thus described it:—"You first heave ahead," said he, "and pass your adversary's yardarm, regain ycur berth on the other tack in the same order, take your station with your partner in line, back and fill, and then fall on your keel, and bring up with your partner; she then manoeuvres ahead, off alongside of you ; then make sail in company with her until nearly astern board; cast her off to shift for herself, regain your place the best way you can, and then let go your anchor."

Sass.—-Two men were standing at the gate of a Georgia farmyard, whittling sticks, and giving each other hints about managing women. "Talk sassy to 'em," the man on the outside of the fence said, " an' you'll see how they'll be fotch down." Just then the cabin door opened, and a redheadod, long-necked woman yelled, "Say, , Zfike, ther flour's out!" "Out whar ?" he yelled back. "Outen the bar'l," she answered. " Wall, put it back, an' cover it up tighter," he replied, while the outside man grinned, " Don't you see how's she backed a'ready?"he laughed, when the fiery knot disappeared. "I docs," spoke the elated victor. Presently the same shrill voice cried, " ' Zeke, I'se gwine over to mar's, an' ef ye think ther measles air ketchin' I'll leave the baby hyar." " Dunno know whether they's Ictchm'or not," replied the husband. " I've never seed 'em ketch enything." And the head was drawn back amid applause frnin the. ntil.sii.le. The next time the door opened tho muzzle of a shot-gun was poked out and a bead drawn on the saucy nrvn."'Z::lc<v' came the solemn voice. "Melindy!" he gasped, looking in vain for smii; place to dodge. " ! Zeke," she continued, "thor flour's out." " All rite; I'm off ter tho mill at once, "he answered shiveringly. "'Zekc'l'm gwine over ter mar's for a spell; d'ye think the measles is ketchin' ?" " No, Melindy ; seed pap ter-day, and he sed the uhillunz wuz all well," " Kerrect," she said, lowering the gun. " I'm off. Ye can sorter clean up the place till I git back, but be shore ter stay innide while I'm gone." "All right." he answered meekly ; and she passed out.