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Waikato Times, Volume XXVIII, Issue 2262, 8 January 1887, Page 2 (Supplement)

A couple of visitors from a rural district in the gallery of the House of Commons were trying to pick out their member, on the floor. "I can't distinguish him," said' one after a hopeless visual observation.; "Of course not," was the honest reply; "he can't even distinguish himself. " <Egles," in the Australasian writes: —An old fellow who keeps a public-house at what was once a busy mining town-; ship was about to take unto himself, a wife, but no parson qualified to perform the service resided nearer than, M , some 60 miles away. To the; clergyman living there the intended bride-; groom telegraphed—"How much willyou charge to come up and marry me ?" The parson wired " £15." The aspirant; replied, "Too much. Will give you ten." Parson responded, "All right, will be up Tuesday." He duly arrived, the gueste were assembled, happy pair ready, and he opened his book and was apparently about to commence when he: whispered to the bridegroom—" Lookt here, road very bad, you'll have to make it fifteen." "No fear,' : was the reply,., uttered aloud ; " I won't give a penny! more. We are in no hurry, are we, Mary ? We can ride down to Lillydale, and get it done for a fiver." "Oh, very well," said the parson, closing his book as he went outside, confidentthat the bridegroom in his anxiety to have the knot tied would follow him aud agree to the terms demanded. But he forgot that at the bridegroom's age "the heyday in the blood is tame—it's humble,"" and so he waited outside in vain, for no messenger came for him. At last, as the mountain would not come to Mahomet, he re entered the house, and said, " Well, at any rate, you won't charge me hotel expenses ? " J'.ust won't I?" said the old fellow. "I will, indeed, and full prices, too. A bargain's a bargain, Mr , aud if you dou't like to take the ten notes you can go back again." The parson could resist no longer, and thought he was better with £10 in his pocket on his return journey ; than without it. And so two persons were made ha'ppy.