RETURNING FROM THE HOT LAKES.

Waikato Times, Volume XXV, Issue 2093, 5 December 1885, Page 3

RETURNING FROM THE HOT LAKES.

The following, which is supposed to have been inspired by (Jcorge Augustus Sala, ftppears in one of our exchange* :— " Being a traveller mjNolf, I am much interested in travellers so <lvi ing my Lite ht.iy in a pretty up-country township, at ono of its wellknow hotels, I am duly impressed by the unusu.U excitement and interest displayed at the aniv.il of .1 tourist who seemed to bo of some importance, Ridging from the bustle caused by liisappe.vr.mce on the sceno." " What is the fuss ?" inquired I of n bystander whr> was surveying the new aniral with hia mouth wide open and eyes staring out of hii> heid. " Knows \ery much. Deeply read," ejaculated the wuiiderKtruck mortal, I nddrowd. " Yes," said I (think ing ho referred to the tourist^ nose), what's the cause of it ?" " Whist ye !" I wiiisj>ered another spectator with a Hibernian cast of countenance. "Whiskey," said I, (I am a little deal), " I nhould'nt be surprised if it were so." This remark of mine created a strong shade of disapproval in the faces of my hearers. As I am of a deeply inquisitive turn of mind, and a* the new visitor engios^ed too much attention for me to find out what wa« hm title, pedigree, coat of amn, and permanent addresH, I contented myself with sciutinizing his luggage. At tea, my attention was again attracted by the excruciating endeavour* of one or two sojourners at the hotel to force the new coiner into conversation. "Did you enjoy your stay at the lakes, sir ?" asked one. " Can't say I did," was the somewhat gruff reply, "NV\er like to get into hot water." The questioner collapsed. "What do you think of the Maori race?" inquired another. '" No more than Ido of the wluto race," replied the evidently much persecuted gentleman. Collapse of conversation ,vk before. After tea tho deluge. The dignitarioK of the town cwne to deputations the renowned and illustrious. But the re nowned and illustrious wan too fly. With a semblance of disd.un lie looked down upon the patricians as if they had been beneath his scrutiny, and his answers were not com plimentary. Poor patncLns were hold entirely. They could not make much out of the celebrated person. They beat a retreat in good order, however. .Success w .it not on tho cards (for they had none). All they could do w.is to appoint a time to meet their high and mighty fuend of a night in the morning, ho not gmtanteping, though, to tumble out at the appointed hour. They then retired and m> did ho. At dawn tho "p- ltl1cl!ln^ u ' ero U P> am * a * t(>r hustling on their store clothes, taking a hasty bieakfast and wasting a few hours at their hmne«, down they tiotted to the hotel of the renowned one. Success was not on the cards this time (though I heard they had Home then, foi forewarned is forearmed). They icnt a "ralef'to Awaken the great man f 10111 !m sweet morning slumber. A snore replied to the quick rap at the door. Then after a succewion of raps came the question, "Who's there?" "Messrs want-, to see you!" "Ask them do they know where Halifax is, and tell thf m they li.id better >-ot nail for that intorentmg place nt once," was tho polite reply. The patn'cian-, however, did not go there at once, for I afterwords saw one of them escorting the renowned and illustrious to the station, where he would be able to catch the hist glimpse of his warm and silicon* friend of a day, and I thought to mvielf, "at lant one of tho patricians hat obtained an opportunity of airing his G.A.S." Tkrewth.

Yo ! It is certainly true. Ask any of your frimds who have purchased there. Garlick andCranwcll h<tvc numerous unasked for and very favourable commendations from country customers «n their excellent packing of Furniture, Crockery, and Glass, &c. Ladies any ?cnt)cmcn about to furnish should remember th.it Garlick and Cran« ell's is Trie Cheap l-'drnishing; Warehouse o Auckland. Furniture to suit all classes : also Carpets, Flcor Cloths and all House Necessaries If^our new house is nearly finished, or, you are iroing to get mimed, \i>it Garlick and Cranwell, Queen-street and Lome-street, Auckland. Intending purchaser* can have a catalogue t#in (rf*