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COLONIAL NOMENCLATURE.

The following amusing article appeared in tho leailing columns of the Lyttelton Times of a recent date : — Mr S.III. now to become .1 welcome guest of this town, is a connoisseur of names as well .1-. an artist in w»nl\ Tho other day he deseubed his feelings on setting out to visit Smith Au-itr 111.1. Of these feelings, one of t!ie cln •£ was th.it of c\ultation at the thought of beholding Humbug Sciub, in the hundied of Paira Wirr, and the electorate of (iumcrach 1. Wheio, then, wrote .Mi Sda, will lie Wiiulnomodloo, Vegetable Creek, or Dirty Mary's Dully, mil other lesser cm unities of Australnn nomenclature ? Wo fear that New Zealand supeuor, of couise, to South Australia 111 all other respects (an we devoutly believe), will be able to show the traveller nothing to surpiss Humbug Scrub, in tho hundred of P.ira Win .md the clcctni.ite of Clumcracha. Wo are as far behind Australia in tho eom[)le\ity of our place names as Austialia is behind the pre-eminence of Madagascar. In this latter woudnnis island the French, who, by the way, aie notonoiwly bad linguists, and huetliPiefore always failed as colonist*, h.ivc been utterly unable to pcnetiate the interior, the troops succumbing less to tho tropical climate than to the unpronounceable nature of the Malagasy place name-'. Entionehed in Antananarivo andjsurrounded by the impiegnablo Arubuubuamvato, the ruggod Andranokoboka, tho stupundous Ambatondr.vzaka, and tho yet more awful Ambohitrakohol.ihy the brave Hovas can safely hurl defiance at their Gallic foes. New Zealand can offer Mr S.ila no such bonnes bouches as these. Our Native names lmvn not even the halo which plays around the mo-quc of JingeereP.eer in Timbuctoo and such savage tribps as tho Uganda* and Betsimissaras. Wo can at the bc->t a*k him to lay the stress on the right syllable in Tapuwaeharuru or Ngutu-o te-Manu. We may suggest to him to acquire the art of uttering Ngatikahungunu as a soft and liquid sound — an art which the Maori can and does master, but which, like throwing tho Australian boomerang, must ever leuiain a mystery to the white m.in. This done, and the mazes of Waikerakikei.u explored, Mr Sala will stand monarch of all lie surveys. No doubt ho will be equal to the effort. One who has visited Russia five times should be able to take in Ins stude any little syllabic obstacles New Zealand can offer. We should not be astonished weie he to profess his ability to do Whareongaonga "on his head." Tho author of the " Biglow Papers " tells of tho village schoolmistress, whose pride alway.s came t« the rescue when any tyro found a name too tough in his- lesson-book. " She nerved her larynx for the desperate thing, And cleared tho fi\e-barred syllables at a spring " Yet, supposing Mr Sala an easy victor in the struggle with Maori nomenclature, he might still hnd food for reflection in home of our mines of placj-i. To the sami) categoiy with Humbug Scrub aforesaid belong our trio of lakelets, tho World, tho Flesh, and the Devil. Among the sublime Alpine height-, of the Otiia, Whiskey Cieek is pointed out to the tomist. Two of the loftie>t chlfs on the romantic coasts of ljank's Peninsula are those which gnaid the enhance to Fle.i Bay. Another lc-s gi.md, but still beautiful chtt is adorned with the title of IMueskm. Should time allow, Mr Sala might ascertain how many Waho.is decorate our limps, a matter which, like the precise numbci of Avons in (Jicat But. un is yet sub judice, and might defy a less patient investigator. Ho might learn to say P.ukakariki without smiling, and teach us to bound Kakahu otherwise than Cock-a who ? He might put in a word against the strange vulg.iiis.rn which makes Womineroo out of Oaniaru, and One hunger out of Onehunpa. He might do many thing* for New Zealand. But, alas ! the (iods are only to show us Mr Sala. In a week he will be gone, and darkness settle down upon our country and its nomenclature, never to ne illuminated by the searching light of (1. A. S.

Ex-Marshal Bazaine, who surrendered Met/, lives in Madrid, and is said to spongeagreit deal on visiting Frenchmen. He is very poor.

Wiluk Sprague (the youth who recently umiiedhis stepmother's sister), when he was born, twenty years ago, had fifty thousand dollars settled upon him. This sum has gone on accumulating, so that when he becomes of age he will ha\e a foitune of one bundled and fifty thousand dollars to stait with. Governor .Sprague and his wife were present at the marriage ceremony.

Great as Daniel Webster was, there must have been tunes when he felt th&t Mra Webster was the bigger person of the two. Some recent reminiscences of the Sage of Marshfield re\eal the fact th.it it \s as not an uncommon thing for him to take his son aside and observe: " Fletcher, my boy, let us go to Franklin to-morrow. We'll have a pood time and leaxe the old lady at home."

In the course of experiment! with dynamite in a tarn among the hills at Pcmbtay, Carmaithenshiro, Wales, a charge, with a five minutes fuse attached, was thrown in the waser. A sportsman, accompanied by a dog, appeared on the scene, and the dog spiang into the water aud seized the parcel, which it brought ashore. At ltngth the charge exploded, and the dog was blown to pieces, A new form of floriculttue has recently been brought before the public in the shape of '• Narcissus farming," The in habitants of the Sully Isles have discovered that by Narei*.su« growing they can not only earn their living but become rich. The storms of wind which sweep over the Scilly Isles are the one difficulty with which growers ha\eto contend, but by plucking the lily when still in bud and then let it open itself in warm water e\en this trouble would be obwated. A correspondent, who has been studying the personal characteristics of Vanderbilt and Gould, says there is something wonderfully alike in the manner of Vandcibilt and Gould, in spite of the fact that one is large in physique and the other small ; and I presume it arises from their distrust of mankind, based on the supposition that everybody who approaches is reaching for their purses. They are visibly neivous, their speech is similarly jerky, and they instinctively avoid looking anybody squarely in the eyes. This shyness of their fellow-men is shown in their summering?. Vanderbilt had it given out that he would spend the hot months at Richfield Springs, but had really engaged quaiteis at Saratoga, under a proviso of secrecy until his arrival. Gould sent forth the assertion that he would make a journey across the continent, and then steamed oti suddenly in his yacht.

Remember This. If you are sick Hop Bittcis will surely aid Nature in making you well when all else fails. If you arc costive 01 dyspeptic, or are suffering from any other of the numerous ! diseases of the stomach or bowels, it is i your ow n fault if you remain ill, for Hop Bitters is a sovereign icnedy in all such complaints. If you arc w asting aw ay with any form of Kidney disease, stop tempting Death ', this moment, and turn for a cure to Hop \ Bitters. ! If you are Nervous use of Hop Bitter^ If you are a frequenter, or a resident of a miasmatic district, barricade your system against the scourge of all countries—malarial, epidemic, bilious, and intermittent fevers—by the use of American Cos Hop Bitters. If you have rough, p\m)>fy, ov vallow skin, bad bieath, pains and aches, and feel miserable generally, Hop Bitters will give you fair skin, rich blood, and sweetest breath, and health. That poor, bedridden, invalid wife, sister, mother, or daughter, can be made the picture of health, by American Co's Hop Bitters, costing but a trifle. Will you let them suffer ? In short, they cure all Diseases of the stomach, Bowels, Blood, Liver, Nerves, Kidney's, Bright's Disease. £.")00 will be paid for a case they w ill not cure or help. Druggists and chemists keep them. None genuine without a bunch of green Hops on white label and Dr Sonle's name blown in bottle. Shun all otheis as \ile, poisonous stuff.

Permanent link to this item
Hononga pūmau ki tēnei tūemi

https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/WT18851006.2.41

Bibliographic details
Ngā taipitopito pukapuka

Waikato Times, Volume XXV, Issue 2067, 6 October 1885, Page 4

Word count
Tapeke kupu
1,387

COLONIAL NOMENCLATURE. Waikato Times, Volume XXV, Issue 2067, 6 October 1885, Page 4

COLONIAL NOMENCLATURE. Waikato Times, Volume XXV, Issue 2067, 6 October 1885, Page 4

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