SOMETHING LIKE A STORM.

Waikato Times, Volume XXV, Issue 2065, 1 October 1885, Page 4

SOMETHING LIKE A STORM.

" WicoiN^ appears to h,t\ c got loft haul," lematked one of the ciowd, chasing a pmv of lemon jied to tin 1 bottom of Ins glass " Well, I should lemark !" emphasised another. " I don t hclievo Wiggins would know a stomi if lie saw one." "Right jou .we, stiangu,' observed a quiet DM 1 ) at .mother table " I've seen storms tli.it would break the hack of anything heeier thought of, and not half "try." " May I ask in what section yon saw that meteorological ehV l manifested?" inquiied the heavy miv of the pnty, making room for the stranger, who advanced glass in hand to join tin party. "In Noithuiu Gieenhnd," re plied the new coiner. "And it was a u inter thunder shower at that," con turned the stranger, heedless of the interruption. "1 spent one winter up there cutting black walnut, and we had it hefty the whole season But that thunder sliower was one of the woist thiugs of its kind I ever took a hand in." "It was in the winter of '40," a.iid the stranger, stirring his glass reflectively, "I'd hecid there was a good deal of walnut timber in them sections, and I was keen to get it. So me and my son took a steamei and went up on the northern coast, where no white man had e\cr been before. As soon as w<» landed we knowed we hail struck it rich. Gentlemen, theie was millions of acres all cut and leady for the market." "The polar beau* had gniwed it oil searching for honey !"' replied the stranger calmly " " The bees settles thick in walnut all through that couutry, and the bears bite down the trees to gtt the stuff. I tell you, sir, a man could get rich in one season if he'd plant them trees full of beeaat different heights ! ' " What would he want the bees at different heights for ?" asked another. " You don't want your walnut timber all the same length, do you?" retorted the stranger. "Where there is a bee's nest, there's where's the bear's going to lute. So, if .1 man put in Jus bees at the proper heights from the giouud, he's going to get his timber any length he wants it !" " True," assented the heavy man. "' Go on with your thunder shower." " Well, as I was telling you, wustaited light in, and in three weeks we were richei than any eight m<jn 111 the country Thcie was no end to the luck ? K\ety thing went our way fioiii the start. We had all the log-j down on the book, and were only waiting for the boat to come and take us off, when I seen clouds making to noith'aid, and I knowed it was going to settle in for thick weather. I told my sou to look out, and 111 less thin half an hour there broke the dogs»ondest storm I ever seed. Rain ! Why, gentlemen, it rained so hard in the muzzle of my gun that it buroted the derncd thing at the breech ! Yes, sir ! And the water began to rise on us too. Why, gentlemen, the water rose so rapidly in our house tint it flowed up the chimney and streamed 300 feet up in the air ! We got it both ways that trip, up and down!" "Do we understand that you arc relating facts within the scope of your own experience?" demanded the heavy man, with his mouth wide open. " Partially mine and paitmlly my son's," answered the unabashed itrangcr. "He watched it go up, and I watched it come dow n ! The man don't live who was quick enough to watch it both ways at the same time ! Rain ! Gentlemen, I won't dcccnc you about that storm. I'll drawit \eiy mild. There were things about it that you might not believe. Those details I will leave out But yon can get some idea of how it rained when I tell that we put out a barrel without any heads into it, and it rained into the bunghole of that barrel faster than it could run out at both ends," "Which of you saw that?" inquired a listener. " We watched an end, my son and me," returned the stranger, " I'm telling you about a storm now, gentlemen. But the woist of all was the lightning. It wasn't in streaks, it just stood still in the flash, and when it got through you should have seen that timber. That timber was chopped in the finest sawdust you ever got your eye on ! Fine as sun IT. Wasn't a stick left half an inch long ! You never saw anything like it ! We thought we might save the sawdust to mix paints with and sa\e a couplo 0' trillion out of the wreck, but while we was thiuki.ig that over the wind sprung up, and then there was music ! Well you can get an imperfect notion of how that wind blew when I tell you that it blowed that sawdust right back into its former shape, and when that storm passed off theie stood them trees just where they stood before the bees got after them?" "I suppose you had to wait until the bears bit them down again, didn't you ?" asked a bystander. "No btar could ever bite them tiees again," replied the stranger, mournfully, "that wind packed them so hard that a bear couldn't get a daw in if he had a buzz saw to help him for a starter." Then the bees are pietty safe in that section now, I take it," obseivcd another interested listener. " That was the worst of all," ic tinned the stianger. " Gentlemen, every bee on tnc northern coast of Greenland was blown inside out, his bones were melted by the electricity, md his honey making power washed away by thu ram." " Did you manage to keep diy?" asked the hca\y man, w ith a sigh of relief as the narrative was concluded. "Gentleman, seeing as you wasn't there I've got an oppoitunity to deceive you. But I won't. I don't keep diy. I haven't been dry since. I'm not dry now. If I was, I'd tcciprocate youi kind hospitality by setting of 'em up. As it is " And he went out of tlie saloon, three drinks ahead and with six or eight glasses following him.

Nkw Jersey locomotives on a South American idilway have aclne\ed an 1111 doulited triumph over Knglish machines in a searching competition, ami they will he hereafter tued exclusively in the equipment of the ro.irl. A nkw dodge in warfare —justifiable as long as warfaie is acknowledged asapait of cmli/ation—i.s to spread wiic fi'iieing along the giound in front of cavalry What fun to see how horses and men tumble about, whilst shaipshooteis and mitrailleuses swept the army into destruction. ()onlon made u--e of those une ent.u)L'ltment3 at Knitouin. As 1 ingenious restaurateur lias intio duced paper plates. Bicul anil butter, cakes iind similar articles can be sened on them. They arc dt signed so ris to closely lescmblo poiccliin, ami arc so cheap that they can be thrown an ay after once lining. They are very light, and do away with the labour of washing.

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