A Dark Problem.

Waikato Times, Volume XXIII, Issue 1893, 23 August 1884, Page 6 (Supplement)

A Dark Problem.

Thk question for debate at the Sewickley Colored Club last evening was : " Which is of most benefit to man, the steam engine or the horae ? " " The horse orator grew pale when his opponent asked, vehemently : What am de hosa anyway ? Nuffin but a steam engine. Did my learned brudder never see a hoss on a cold day how de steam comes out ob his nose ? Keep dafc steam inside an' de horse would bust." " An' when we come to die," said the horsa orator, "how'd we look goin' to de cemetery in a steam hearse? Dat would be puffeokly 'diculous ? " This turned the tide and the horse side won. A writer in a scientific monthly asks : "What is a meter?" In reply a jocular editor said : "An opinion has long prevailed that a meter is a contrivance that works twenty-seven hours a day, eight days a week the year around ; and when you resolve to economize in the use of gas, it throws in a jcouple of extra hours daily without charge." " Oranges should never be eaten in com* pany," says an authority. We have noticed the disadvantages of eating oranges, too, and have come to the conclusion that the only way to really enjoy an orange is to retire to some sheltered spot in the grove, strip, seize the orange and go in swimming in it. — Ne\e York Commtreial Advertiser. GrENfißALii* a man doesn't like to be ootitr'adicted. But when he calls himself a fool or an ass, you run less personal danger in contradicting than in agreeing with him.— Boston Transcript. " What's your impression of Texas ? " said a traveller to his fellow pasßenger on a southwestern bound train. "It's a great place for life insurance clerks." " I don't understand you." 14 Why, they're sure of pretty steady omployment." "JSxplain yourself." " If one is discharged, he shoots a policyholder or two, and the company is glad to take him back again." In playing a game of seven-up with a young lady from St. Paul, a wicked Bismarcker told her that every time she held the jack of trumps it was a sure sign that her lover was thinking of her. Then he watched her face at each deal, and every time she blushed and looked pleased, led oufc and caught her jack.—Bismark Tribune. A Gtbbmax physiciari defines the main difference in the effects of whiskey and beer to be : " Viskey makes you kill somebody else ; mit beer you only kills yourself."

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