ECHOES FROM THE CAFE.

Waikato Times, Volume XXII, Issue 1851, 17 May 1884, Page 3

ECHOES FROM THE CAFE.

I wonder why we Aucklanders are so fond of lagging behind the rest of the world in some matters. Look at our telegraph poles for instance. Could anything be more ugly and unsightly ? And yet the Department is allowed to erect them in the streets without a word of remonstrance from the City Council. Not only so, but special facilities are offered for the continuance of the practise, as an extraordinary structure has just been placed on the roof of the City Council offices, and what looks very like the gallows erected by Haman for the benefit of his friend Mordecai has been put up at the foot of Barrack Hill for the purpose of carrying the telegraph lines. In other colonial cities of the importance of Auckland the wires are carried on iron supports, which are light looking, and nothing like so ugly as our great wooden posts, while in New York it has been decided that all telegraph wires must in future be carried under ground, and two years and a-half has been fixed as the time within which, all the wires overhead

must be removed. Of course the population of Auckland could be put in a corner of New York without making any appreciable difference, so it may be alleged that there is not the same necessity for the change from overhead to underground here as there, but what is good for a large city is not likely to be bad for a small one, and at any rate we have as much right to neat iron telegraph posts as Christchurch and Dunedin. Whatever, our rights may be, the fact remains that we have great ugly, wooden telegraph poles, and the City Council, instead of protesting against them, offer facilities for their continuance. * * Thi9 is a great place for lawyers. The other day I had the misfortune to be compelled to appear in the Resident Magistrate's Court (not the Police Court, my gentle readers. I have not made my bow there yet), and I noticed that there seined to be an uncommonly large number of the legal profession present. I took the trouble to count them, and found that there were no less than twenty, and I believe that not one half of the profession was present. As there are no less than forty lawyers in Auckland, that, taking the population of Auckland and its suburbs at 40,000, would give one lawyer for every thousand of the population. This does really scorn rather too many, and I do not think we have any reason to be grateful to those who ha\c made the entrance to the legal profession more easy, though I notice that Sir George Giey in his speeches down South takes credit to himself for his efforts in that diiection. No doulit it is necessary to have lawyers for drawing conveyances, leases, wills, and other documents, but I feel quite sure that we have far more ot them than are at all necessary, and that it would be a positive benefit to the community if no more were allowed •to pass. Some people laboured under the delusion that if we had moie lawyers there would bo competition among them and the public would get the benefit of cheaper law, but, so far, the only result seems to have been an increase in the numbei of lawsuits without any decrease in the costs. * Cheap law is not l<y any means an unmix'ed blessing. I dare say some of the readers of The Waikato Times have read about the celebrated Chisholm Will case, which was before the Supiemc Court some years ago. It was said that the testator hail gone the rounds of the solicitor's offices to sec which of them would draw his will for the least charge and that he succeeded in getting it done for half a guinea. It was so drawn that it did not hold good in law, and so was set aside, at a cost of some hundreds of pounds, and the piopeity was apportioned in a very different manner from that intended by the testator. A playwright, named Macklin, makes one of his characters give a very humourous and true description of law, which is as follows: — "The law is a sort of hocuspocus science, that smiles in yer face while it picks yer pocket ; and the gloiious uncei tainty of it is of mair use to the protessois than the justice ot it." * * The East Coast electorate seems to be determined to occupy a prominent position in political matters. It had haidly got over the excitement consequent on the departure of its member without resigning his seat, w lien it ere ited a fresh one by a number of the eleetois inviting Sir Julius Vogel to accept nomination. So far as has transpired the reasons w hich prompted the invitation are of the most selfish nature, being the hope that by the assistance of Sir Julius, Gisboine will get its harbour constructed and a railway made into the interior. A selfish constituency could not have a more fitting representative than the man who introduced the great borrowing policy of New Zealand and obtained for it the nickname of the "Gieat Loan I/iud.*' Whatever he did, his first care always was to pay himself and that at an excessive late. We all know what a tremendous pi ice he marie the colony pay for his services when he was Premier and aftei wards when he was Agent-General, and it is quite certain that we cannot afford to pay snch a price now, nor is there any reason why we should. What we want just now is retrenchment, and if the piesent Ministry will not f\arry it out we certainly need ijot look to Sir Julius Vogel to do it, for it is a thing he never understood, whether applied to himself or the colony. At no peiiod of our history did wo stand more in need of a good, honest and capable statesman, but we will not find him in Sir Julius Vogel. Someone has christened him the "El Mahdi of New Zealand," and those who trust in him will find him a veritable false prophet. * # ■» It was a rather stupid thing of Mr T. Spurgeon to take as the text of his farewall sermon, '• I will arise and go to my father," as it naturally induced people to identify him with the " prodigal son," and to ask whether he had been " wasting his substance with 'riotous living. "' Of course, we know that he has not. Still his choice of a text 'laid him open to the imputation, and was a foolish action on his part. ■*■ Talking about the " prodigal son," I heard a good story on the subject the other day. A young man, who had been a veritable prodigal, was telling a friend that he had returned to his father. '' Did he kill the fatted calf ?" asked the friend. " No," was the reply, " but he nearly killed the prodigal." * ♦ MrEnington, who was recently appointed dock engineer, has submitted to the harbour board new plans for the Cailiope Dock, which he asserts will afford all the accomodation requisite, at a cost within the means of the board — not moie than £120,000. He proposes to effect a considerable sa\inir by carrying the woik 100 feet further inland, and by placing the machinery on the solid rock instead of on the reclaimed land. For the sake of the future prosperity of the port, it is to be hoped that the work can be constructed for the sum named, and that it will be pn««hed on and soon become an accomplished fact. At the meeting at which the plans were submitted, it was decided to import a dredge, capable of dredging 250 tons per hour at a depth of 30 feet. It is proposed to use the silt for the purpose of reclaiming Freeman's Bay, and it is expected that the revenue from the land so reclaimed will enable the board to reduce the port charges, &c, 30 per cent, which will make Auckland practically a free port. With a magnificent harbour, an immense dock, and nearly nominal port charges, there will be almost no limit to the amount of shipping that will come here, bringing wealth to our city and to the country of which it is the outlet. All we want is the canal between the Waitemata and Manakau harbours as the copestone of our prosperity. * The Irish people are proverbial for their wit, which seems to flow without any effort on their part. One of the most amusing remarks I have heard for some time was made to me by an Irish lady, a charwoman by profession, whom I employ occasionally. She had done some work for me and came to me for payment. When I gave her her money, she blessed me and told me that two gentlemen whom she mentioned and myself were the best men in Auckland, and that we would all go to Heaven. 1 told her that I hoped to meet her there, " Shure, sir," she replied, " if I am there before yez, I will open the door for yez and have a cup of tay ready to refresh you after yer journey." I think I deserve great credit for solf-control that I did not laugh when I thanked her promised kindness. St. Moxgo.

The Cambridge Town Hoard invite tenders for drainage at Lake Te Koutu. The New Zealand Tweed Company have an important notice in our advertising columns. The agent at Cambridge is Mr Chas. OBrien, Masonic Hotel, and at Hamilton Mr Morris Moses, drapor,