CLIPPINGS.

Waikato Times, Volume XXI, Issue 1760, 16 October 1883, Page 4

CLIPPINGS.

It take 3 the moon to b -ing a dog to bay. ' A critic noticing an awkward couple dancing a minuet, said that they looked as if they were doing it for money, and were very doubtful about getting paid. A LTVKriY Hibernian exclaimed al a party where Thedore ''ook shone the star of the evening : " Oh, Master Theodore, but you're the hook that nobody can bate !" It's about an even thine between man and the orange peel. Sometimes the man throws the 01 ange peel into tlio gutter, and sometimes the orange peel tin m\s tinman into the gutter. " Skii' the hard wolds,'' said a school mistress to one of her pupils ; " they'll only the names of some foreign countnes and yez nivcr will be in thim." A voo.vo lady was caressing a pretty spaniel, and muimuring, " Ido love a nice dog !" " Ah !" sighed a d.uuly, standing near ; " I would I were a dog " " Never mind." retorted the young lady, sharply: " you'll grow." Ox hearing of the death of General Tom Thumb, Mr Barnuin despatched the following telegram to his wife :—: — 11 Dear Lavinia , yourself and family have my warmest sympathies. Death is as much a part of the Divine plan as birth. The Heavenly Father finally overcomes evil with q >od. His will bo done !" Anent, a London paper remarks that Mr Barnuin dots not appear at all anxious to live down his ahat, of " The Prince of Humbugs." The Mango.— -In one of his novel", Captain Marryat depicts an old Indian resident engaged in devouring mangoes with his shut sleeves tinned up and a tub of water in iiont of him. That the gallant captain was not far out in his ideas, except that a specially conducted fork now takes, the place of the tub, will be seen fiom the following description of the mango and the way to eat it, given by a tropical tiaveller. Unfortunately an ordinary colonial's c\pjiicnce of the fruit it confined to ehutnee, of which the mango forms the basis • — One of the most delicious pioduUs of the tropics is the mango, the citing ot which, however, is apt at first to embn lass and perplex a stianj<or to no smnll <lcgre«' In shape the mango lcsembles a pear with the stem at the wrong end, flattened howevei, like a bean, and with the small end turned over to one side, something like the figures common on cashmeie ahawls. One large vaiicty is cntucly yellow, and a smaller kind of yellow, with rich red checks, offeiing tempting hues for a still life painter. Inside is a very large seed, which forms a considerable impediment to the employment of the inexperienced, for the pulp is joined to this in astiingy way, and it is difficult to handle the slipery thing. A thoroughly ripe mango has a kind of combination of musl'.melon and baked custaid aspect and texture to its deep yellow pulp, and its rich fla\ouris indesci ibable, except that when eaten foi the lir.it time it seeiiH tn have a slight trace of tuipentine, which lcsemblancc, however, disappe.ua on acquaintance. The laigc yellow v.uioty .seemed to me to have a very slight md doho.itu lla-wmi of peanut candy. Tlic peisoiiwlto eats <v mango for the lust time genoi.illy covei-, himself with contusion and his face with m.ingo pulp anil juice, wludi is veiy sticky and yellow, so that he looks a-, it somebody "had been feeding him with soft-boiled eggs in the d.uk. It will not do to cat a in.iugo as one would do an ordinary fruit, the con eet way being to use a mango folk, which has but one tine, and is ically not a folk at all, but a spit. With this the fi nit is impaled at one end and the point tin ust fiimly in the seed, which may thus, be shipped of its last pulp wichout soiling the fingers. Chvffinc the Phhßs.. — Some, people are always nibbing their hands with mischievous i^lee at the ease w ith which Mi Gladstone is " diawn "'.is the slang phiasegoes, ;. <\, is persiuded to an swot any accusation or lemonstrance made to him. He is certainly not a hadgi'i in this respect. But thoic are othei eminent, peisonages -who sh.ue his weakness. Because souu'bo'ly a«s 'i tcii thit the debate upon the DriuMscd Wile's Sistei's Bill, in the »*onk, was cutshoit because it was tune toi the Prince of to 'j,o to dinner, the Bishop of W.ivhestei has actually wiittcn to say th.it their Loulships did not lise so t>,uly " tiom that unworthy motive. ' It he had left matteis there the thing w ould hay i been ludiei ons enough ; l)iit he gois on to My th.it the debate was shoitned for the sake of IVci-> with weak stomachs, who could not postpone their usual ilinnei-time Suicly e\en the Peers might have siciiilecd something foi the sake of defending all that (neemdms! to tin: Bishop) is lime hoiiouicd o-ud valuable I—' 1 London Town Talk." Mks Lvs(.tuv was interviewed by a New York renoiter on .July 24, piior to her departuic foi Jloinc. "1 am off to-day," she -aid, "by the Alaska. I have cleaied by my Ameiu an season over r2.">,0!)0dol, but I hnve invested neuly all of it in New Voik in bonds and mortgages. I think I hold mortgages on about half the houses on Fifth Avenue. I have had, oh ! such a happy time. I have seen much of (.his beautiful and wondeiful conntiy, met many nice people, and received much kindness fiom public audiences and pi i\ ate fnencK My nc\t American season opuns in iMontie.il, October 2!). 1 shall bi ing bnek many of my old company, inclndmj: b\ \Y. Ooopc? as leading man, and Hodson. I shall also have several new people in the company, amoim them Mr ami Mis Weaver, well known in London. I will have a new play wntten by Bolton Roue. The Benson will last 31} week?, Then I go to Australia." Mrs Langtiys Australian engagement will probably commence about Angust next, and she Mill leeeive from Mr Mori is Grcetiwall £GOO per week during the term. Man u:i:mi:\t of Sunn* —A late " Farmers' Home Journal ' contained an article on the " Importance, to Sheep of Good Management," which contains many evcellentand suggestive ideas. The writer says :— " I do not keep man t \ sheep, do not think it good plan to keep too many sheep together on a farm, especially if it is a small one. Sheep should not be kept in one field too long. Theic should be changed every two or tluec months to a fresh pasture. I mean during the glazing .season, I do not think it so essential during the winter, though one or tw o changes during the winter would be ■well enough. I believe the giea test seciet to the health of sheep is to keep them diy during winter and early spring. I never let my sheep get wet from October to May, day or night. lam just as caicful in stabling them at night hi winter as I am my horses. I have a waim, diy stable with plenty of air and light. Theie are but few flocks of sheep in this vicinity that are not more or less affected with catarrh of the head, but I never lud a sheep to have catarrh while under my care. 1 verrily believe that catanh is the result, either dnectly or indirectly, of exposure. I have lost but two sheep from diseases in the last twenty years— one of these died from grub in the head, and the other from rabies. "In feeding I prefer the blade fodder, either from corn or sorghum to any other roughness. I do not think that hay is good for sheep ; if fed in racks the seed damages the "wool materially, and I think it is injurious to their health. For pasture I prefer short grass. In feeding grain I prefer shelled oats to any other grain. Corn and oats mixed make a very good feed. If I had no oats I would feed corn with a liberal feed of wheat bran once a week. " I have been raising sheep for twenty years. My experience has been with Cotswolds and Southdowns, J find Southdowns more hardy than Cotswolds. I am raising from imported Cotswolds now, though I have some ewes that are one-eight Southdowna. The best sheep I ever raised for wool and muttou was a, cross between thene two breed*, one-fourth Southdowae,"

i ' Will you have dinner at the fating station ? asked the train boy of a passenger, ' Yes,' said the passenger, arising and following tho boy. 1 'I just wanted to know,' said the boy. *so I could telegraph ahead.' 'Telegraph," repeated the tired passenger, whose patience the slowness of the train had exhausted, I thought you wanted me to sholl on ahead and t-at by the time the train would got then. I .' Aj!m;m ¥ Mrvj)i:i> Mi,\ — The Oracle, in ,in .nticli'on tins saliject, refcis to an episode- of Leasing, who " suffered himself to be tinned I rein his own door by a scivnnt not iccoginsing linn and denying that ho was at home, with .1 ' Vety well, no matter; I'll call another time.'" Yet it is not without reason that, in spite of Ins peculiarity, the title of "The Absent Man" full par e\ci Hence on the Rev. fieoigp Ihnvest. This worthy individual, we aicnedibly informed, was engnged to mairv the daughter of T)r Compton, Bishop of London. The day was named, and the bride in te.idiness for the important ceremony. But the groom came not ; fishing, he fhhed on till the canonical hour had slipped by— clipped by as far as he and his intended were concerned for ever. It is no more surprising that her indignation was such that she broke oft' tin- match with the man who could thus he.utlessly lorget her on her wedding morn than that same man in after yeaiswnsso treated for the san.e icason "by a second and equally offended bride." The case insensibly calls to mind that cited by Loid Campbell in his "Li\es of the Chancellors." fortunately for the ladies one of considerable lanty Thoie the offender was " Sim |oaut Hill — supposed to be tin 1 greatest black letter lawyer since Maynard't. tune, and as much celebrated for lns> eocontuoity is In.s learning," It is stated ot him that on his weddin<_' night, going to tin 1 chambers in the Temple, lie continued there "leading cases till next morning." He Thought of tho yo.u- books and foigot his bnde. An lush manager, playing the oluuacter of King Homy in Kicii.ud 111., after dclnormlj liim-,L-]f of Ins speech commencing— Oh tliou, whoso urn clouting thoughts Not .ill tho hid.'oiw tonoi-, of thy guilt can shake. Whose conscience with thy body over sleeps — -,1c >p on .' rein v. led, as umu, for some time in silence Tiien, seized with one of Ins not infrequent fits of absence, he availed himself of the fivouiahlc oppoitunity affix ded him of counting the house In another minute. lie utkred, with evident joy: "Sixteen pounds two in the boxes: thiee pound ten in the pit; gallery, seventeen thirteen !" Him Ki.vguum i'ok a Hok.se.— A celebiated aotoi. who is now made much of in all ciieles, attended the .Shire hoise exhibition (at least, a friend, who is rather anecdotal, vouches foi the fact), in company w ith an esteemed lady, a unknown li.uoncss, noted for hoi Kindness to tho low ci animals. Hoy.iltx. was in tho company, and, of com so, they weie much stared at The distinguished playu somehow did not woai the kingly dignities of the members of t\v) pai ty but lather lv-> its'tal foteign sipptaianei' When tho wlnsp"r went louud the jaid, tliciefoic, thiit Yiinket dc.ileisweic .ibout tiymg to pick np anything good that i they could get, thoic w.is little woudet that the distinguished Thespis, who shall otheiwise lie nameless, should have been accosted by a well-known Yoikslnie bieedoi with the remarks, "You cooin and have a look at mine, mister, be'orc you deal ; he's as good as gold, he is, eveiy inch in him ; ,u\ eye in his he id like an onion, 1 lbs like u- barrel, and legs on him like bus of non. JIo'H suit \oti all down to the giound. he will, nnstei ; he.-, just tho .sort for your country — he, he ! You come nnd have a look at him, and if it comes to a luck penny, I'm not the man to stick." " My dear fellow, I don't want a hoi.se !' was the good-natnied ieinonstianco of the placer, who never had been on the back ot one in his life. " Ot> , come, th.it bly way oi dealing you Yankee follows lviu 1 , won't woik with me. Why, theioV a tiie-nd ot mine said he saw you liinuiu' about last night, teanng yoni hair like a madman, yelling you would give >our kingdom foi a lioiso !" The enictoi of Ilicluud s.iw tlnough the joke, and w,i-> luiiisc If avam ! Tlic friend, how over, had gone, it is needless to say, lound the corner to enjoy his laugh. — Live .Stock Journal. At a cci tain Com t theatie on tho Continent, the leading comic actor entered into a wager with the leader of the oichestra that ho would undeitake to " put, out" the musicians in the middle of their pel formance. The actoi, while the musicians wcio sciaping and blowing advanced to tho footlights and drawinir a lemon from Ins pocket, hu bit into it, The pel founds on the In ass and iec<l begin pulling wry faces and their mouths filled with water, ,so that they weie compelled to put down their installments, and weie unable to piodueo a clear note for the novt fiv e minute. C.vvi'iA. Pr, u;t"i'" RntKDrKs, — Consul Ciimcion, in hisolhcuil lepent on the trade and a^rieultuio of Java, states that the attention of the (Joy eminent lias lately been di.iwn to a now method of combatting the cattle plague. l)r van der Heyden, tlie oiiginaloi of tlic pioccss, who has emplo\ ( d his method in Japan for curing other infections diseases, has, at tho invitation ol the Netlici lands-India authoiitics, experimented in Java with some success on animals attacked by this epidemic. The piocess consists in mtia\ascular injection of lodium in the pi opoi tion specified to the weight of the animal infected. It is added that the injection has, accoiding to Dr 'van der Hc\den, the eflcct of completely annihilating the living oiganisms present in the disc ised bodj. Wr.vnii.u Pnorni.Ts — Moore, the almanac maker, met an old shepherd, and asked him what he thought of the weather, as lie had ,i long journey before him. The shepheid said he believed it wonld turn out a rainy day, although it was then very fine. The rider went on Ins way, and was well drenched with rain befoic his journey's end. On bis, return he saw the same shepherd, and said to him, "Well, you wore right. You must have some valuable rules for the weather, I'll give \ou a L'ninea if you will tell it me." "I w ill," .said the shepherd. The guinea was handed to him at once, and he said, " Why, sir, I take Moore 1 1> AlmaH'tc, ami he said it would be a fine day ;' now I always find tho contrary to what he says is right; so I knew it would rain."