FEATHERS AND CHAFF.

Waikato Times, Volume X, Issue 770, 24 May 1877, Page 2

FEATHERS AND CHAFF.

(From an Auckland Correspondent.) PR WALHS AND THE GOOD T SMI? LARS. That truly great and versatile man Dr VVallis, has gob into hot water with the Good Templars, whose combined votss were the chief element in his successful election. The doctor made a speech the other day, ia which he quoted, with much gusto, a verse from one of Tom Moore's ballads, which runs thus : — "Your glass may be purple and mine may be blue, But while they are filled from the same bright bowl The fool that would quarrel o'er difference of hue Deserves not the comfort they shed o'er the soul." The Good Templars deny that they ahed any comfort at all, and have requested Dr Wallia to beware of quoting from such obnoxious authors in future. Such, my friends, is bhe evanoacene of popularity. spieitoolism. . The newspapers here have played into Walker's hands by the notice bestowed upon him. Walker and his confreres laugh ia their sleeves while the Press launches its thunders and whets public cnriosity. Walker's Sunday evening services are crowded, and his plate is not sent empty away. Already his friends talk of starting an organ in the Spirit interest, and the spirit of liev Stewart (Walker's control) will canvas for subscribers amongst the departed. I'm afraid the spec is nob a promising one. To show the strides that Spiritualism is making in Auckland, I may mention that in an account of a recent concert, in one of the papers, the audience are said to have been ' entranced ' by one of the singers. A POPUIuVR ERROR. One of the grossest popnlar errors of the day ia that mothers-in-law are a bore. I've come a good deal into contact in my time with tuo mother-in-law species, and I must sav that, as a class, it can boast of many members who are ornaments to society. I have seen these gentle creatures exerting themselves in every possible way to Bmooth the path of some ungrateful son-in-law, preaching blessed peace and resignation, and preparing hi-m to meet his fate with, fortitude. I have seon many of these much-abused mothers-in-law voluntarily give up the whole of their time, leave their own homes, and devote their undivided attention to the domestic affnira of the young husband. What should we do without mothers-in-law, and where would we nave gob our wives, I should like to know, if there had'nt been any mothers-in-law? I am led to making these remarks in consequence of something I read iu a Southern newspaper, about a father-in-law. This amiable peison was in the habit of quartering himself upon his son-in-law whenever he got drunk and affectionate — and that was very often — and the. visits usually ended in a fight, and the son-in-law had to apply to the police for protection. A SPIRITUALISTIC SELL. It was at Me L d's, the temple of the Spiritualists. It is here that the sisters and brothers meet and spend many hours in sweet converse with the spirits. They were thus engaged the other eveniug when some of the shiniDg lights of the uew Mumbo-jumbledom expressed deep regret that they had not yet succeeded in witnessing the higher developments of the science, Such as table-rapping. In a glow ot" enthusiastic fervour, the leader of the band expressed au ardent desire to heir those ' raps'. He said he was getting iuto bhe scar and y+llow|'eaf, and if he could only hear those blessed ' raps' he would die happy. Suddenly three very distinct raps were beard ou the table. Exclamations of joy ran round the table, and a repetition was requested. The raps were given again and again, the spirit rapped out his name, and all the circle were in extaciea and filled with wonder. At length the lights were turned up. and it was noticed that Mrs appeared to ba going off into a fit, Her extraordinary shivering and tKe convulsive twitching of her body indicated that some internal struggle wa.3 going on. Just as someone was about to rush off for a doctor the old lady broke out into a loud and prolonged peal of feminine laughter, and whoa she succeeded in eontrolling her mirth she explaiued to the astonished ' sukle' that she hid made the raps herself beneath tho darkness. She ha3 been excluded from the seances. Walker never laughs. He keeps a countenance like a sexton. This is another proof of his extraordiuaay cleverness. A WIFE TO SEDTj. Does any Waikato man want a wife ? There ia one for sale cheap in Auckland, an advertiser here says she • hopas to find a purchaser' — and 1 hope so too. Another fellow who has an eye to business says that Esther Corcoran, owner of lot so and so, ' may find a purchaser' by applying to him. JUBYMBN'S WIT. I I wonder some humourist has not, era i now, compiled a book cf jokes from all the good things that have been said by juvymen. Tho outsida public has no conception of tho humour of . juries, especially since the State has provided the refreshments. There was one here during tho late Session which had great difficulty in agreeing upon a verdiot, owing to the obstinacy of an old toper who inoisted that he could not bring all hia faculties to bear upon some of tho points in the evidence, without some further refreshment, and the foreman haU to send out for a. quart of besr at his

own coat. I was at an inquest tha other day, wlf are. a man passed a slip of paper to. one of, -the jurors, on wliioh was written, 'This ia a mare's nest.' 'No, ah asaes,' promptly wrote the other, underneath. • \ * * ... ,\A MINBOB 1 SOAP. ; America 'is a^gneat couatry. Every body has read ot the man who struck 'lie,'-. and made a groat* fortune, bub history has yet to record the feats of another Yankeo whp. has discovered a mine. of soap; in Venturt Couaby, California. . Dou't you think you might lind something of tnaj. kind in the Wuikabo. lit would ba so handy to the Maoris, you .know. 'There l ia a soda-water spring at Wangarei, and several prospecting parties have gone out from time to timo, in the hope of finding a brandy, spring not far ~offr*~ If they should suooeed, there wil be a rush of population t» that favoured .spot. ; , • ■