THE CHAMPION LIAR

Waikato Times, Volume X, Issue 669, 2 September 1876, Page 3

THE CHAMPION LIAR

One evening last week, when the winter bla»t» IB' an d »adly around tho Hfcreet corners, and the captain of the ferryboat! wore anxious looks arv«n < r eight veael owners and " laid up" luke captains «at around a ba«e humor in n xaloon near tho mar- After tho imial »<n>u»t of growling about the weather, one of them fc'»ld a itory. There might have b'jen an ounce of truth about it, but the crowd felt cerUin that th<* one ounce wait offset by twenty four pound* of tho "awfull«st k ad" of lying 'lh-r«fore a fcccond man to d a itory to beat it, and th'-n a thirl m«n to it tb- eeoond When tho forth man started out he nil: "Gentlemen, I have also seen tou^h timei. Wneu I w&h tailing tb« ichoooer Fortune forty year* ago two of us were swept overboard, in ant r.n on Lake Erie one black night, a hatch cover vnnt with us, and it ho happened that we b->th clutched it. It waa not large enough to support two. I wa« a captain — be a ■titor. I had a f4mily — be had none. I abonted to him to quit his hold, and wh»n he would not, I reached over, c'utchsd hie throat, and hell on »ill his fingers loosened, aud he went to the bottom of tho lake. It w»s twoity miles off Poiot Betsy, an 1 with a shrill, wild ■hreik, which yet hnßors in my ears, the po >r wretch weak to hi* death ! May the L >rd forgive me !" With hia chair tilted against the wall, j a Unky sunuoweriah chap had b'tu ( odding his head right and left, •■ if aleepiug. Aa the cap'atn'i narrative was oonoludfld, the ■ stranger rose up and ; solemly said : "I am that man!" Tne orowd looked nt him in astoni«hm«nt and he continue I : * I landod on Pomt 1 Rct^y nflxfc morning in time for br< ftkfait, and I nwore a , o |emn oath that I'd lick you for choking m( if I had to live a hundred ytars to do You can't be the man, ' repl>«d the oip'ain, looking tinpioious at t'.e fellow's big fi«t» j M it was forty years »gf>." •• I know it wan, and for* forty year» I bay« bti»n aihmg tv litk you tut ttl your bo 't< !" Tb.) captain hid lird, hut he didn't want t<> own it, and he Raid : "The anil >m name was Uick Rico " " K«reo«!" bowod the stran^r, "th»t'« my uaiao 1"

" Jiil, in. vvus la.iU i t iui," "B iingiii the water a i lun,' iba 1 - m.ht I uLrunk just a foot," wt<B '.he co.>i nj'liner. " Woli I know y u ctn't ba the man," said tlie cv.tun. "1 mn the m»n. and now I'm going to mini you to pulp ! No mau cm j jkc nic .md ih»;ii br*g about it !" Ho « no I in a "I iqinefc the captain, l<n w*» th ii 8-t upm by ilie whole orowJ. lie gul into the eyou of (be wind, »-ul hun« tbfcre for a time, i>ut i r«--e tly he paid off ii )itt)>, gob (h-i wiud on his qua - ler, and went to lick ton, tim -h hn> woivht iv <1 1 liars. He was ay rv am. buiniia umu »ud those who oould got out ■f d< on got out, ami thoau who oould'nt offdred him a gallon of whisky to cooib to dm bur. Ue iurli d hi« «ai h on this nn(Jerntand ng. «ud as he act hi* gl*'<6 duwn for the thud uriuk he wiped bis bleeding ear, at.d r«m<irktd — " When « man tries to aacrißce me in wrier to save himself, bo dou't know win be'« fooling with 1" He wai the biggest liar of tbera nil, but he made most out of it.