ALCOHOL AND TEA

Waikato Times, Volume IV, Issue 210, 13 September 1873, Page 2

ALCOHOL AND TEA

The injudicious use of alcohol ofteij lead* to acts ofriolencp, but it does not •tmiulate the instinct*, of craft. It makes people sing "Auld lang syne," or "Ho's a jolly good fettou ;" it makes them laugh, or cry, or jump ahput,' or fall down flaf, or embrace each other, or swear eternal friendship or eternal enmity, or give eich other black eyes ; it e?en makes men bent their wires. It never makes men sty. A man far gone in drink never forges a cheque Ido not believe there is a drunken detective in the police force. But watch the effect of tea. You never find people sing " Auld lang syne" over their tea, nor do they fight over it. All is calm and peaceful on the surface. But underneath ! I never drink tea w ithout feeling as if I should like to over-reach somebody nirectly. \ feel as if it would do mo good to go in for a competitive examination on the spot. 1 invent wooden nutmegs and dummy ship-bolts. I think of abtruse conundrums. I long to start bubble companies and forge trade-marks. In a short time \ experience a general relaxation of, fibre. I find I have no physical courage, no patriotism, no love of man as man, no motto but Caveat emptor, or, the devil takeW the hindmost. I am convinced that there is more' short^ weight given by tea : drinking shopkeepers than by tipsy ones All this seems to agree with the alleged eff.ct "of tea upon the animal ecopomy in. arresting waste. As it mak«jTou' want to keep all you get, it is natural that it should make you want to get all you can, I invite the attention of pathologists, psychologists, reformers, and legislators to this great question, lyiiile vre hare been turning our eyes upon the more obvious and vidgar evils attendant upon the free use of alcohol, we have been overlooking the insidious action of a bland and. peaceful liquid which has been sapping the foundations of manhood and honesty. Alcohol sends a few to gaol or to the inadhoute. Eut tea, acts through, the nervous system on the conscience and turns us into a nation of sneaks. Let us, then, take instant action. Jt would, be difficult, at preient, to prohibit entirely the sale of tea, but pray do what you can ! You do not hesitate to pick my pocket in order to educate somebody else's' child. Why should you hesitate to rob ma of either money or pleasure in order to prevent the relaxation of other people's moral fibre" by the use of tea ! I say, let the whole tea tiade be placed, under instant legislative checks. Set up visitors to go from door to door, as your school board inquisitors do, and fct them inquire into the quantity of tea drunk in every household,, whether black or mixed, and the strength of the infusion. Let every tea-dealer keep a register of his customers, and jf, upon a monthly or quarterly average, it is found that his sales go beyond a quarter of a pound a year for each adult, fine him, or nail his earj to the door, or something of that " sort. Perhaps the recpnt reaction in favour of seventy would even support you in applying the cat in such cases. All the favour I ask is that as soon as ever any parliamentary rival of Sir Wilfrid Lawson has made, up his mind to bring in a bill to carry out these objects, he will oblige me with a private intimation, so that I may take care of myself (I am fond of tea) by laying in a stock that will last out my natuiaL life, or (since tea deteriorates by keeping) that I may have time to import and cultivate the tea-plant itself. If such conduct as this on the part of the introducer of such a bill, aecm a little at variance with principle, it vnl] at leasfcbe admitted that it is m harmony with that spirit of enlightened, compromise which distinguishei our age.— Saint Pauls.