HENPECKED HUSBANDS. (Liberal Review.)

Waikato Times, Volume III, Issue 150, 24 April 1873, Page 2

HENPECKED HUSBANDS. (Liberal Review.)

It lias been frequently stated tliat there is no mora contempt iblc object than a henpecked husband. A poor woman, wlio lies crushed boneath the weight of a tyrannical marital despotism, is regarded as a being deseuviug of the most lin-eiM-e compassion, wlukt her tormentor i» looked upon as one for w horn the cat-o'-ninc-tn-ils and imprisonment would be inadequate punishment. But when the tables are reversed and she i» the persecutor and he the sufferer, he obtains not the slightest atom of pity, while she sinks but little in public estimation. Indeed, so far from receiving comfort from his friends, ho is constantly twitted with bis misfortunes, nnd urged to adopt a course to remedy his miserable condition) a course for which he has the greatest poisible distaste, and which lie feels, if ft/llbwed, would not fail to land him in a quagmire of miser) ten tunes worse than that from which hetried to escape. Now, this is Tcry hard,«ind manifestly unjust towards henpecked husbands. Granted that the majority of men possess firmer wills and more powerful mental organizations than do the majority of women, it is inditputablo that many men are infinitely inferior in firmncii and general brain power to some women. Now, if two people are living togethor, having identical interests, upon all momentous iuuei, the one who possesses the strongest nature must carry the day. Further, lie or she — ai the case maj be — nnut, m reality, rule the house, and practically regulate the conduct of the other. If a woman be determined, selfish, vixenish, and reckless, nnd a man vacillating and weak, it is the most natural thing in the world that he should have rather an> unhappy lot. It is, under such circumstances, simply impossible for him to assert successfully what the world says ought to be his proper position. "Why, then, should he be sneered at ? Certain it is that he cuts a sorry and ridiculous figure. He is humiliated by being snubbed) by hii amiable spouse, in the presence of his children, his friends, and the public in general. He is forbidden, to indulge in. his favourite pastimes j and has to descend to petty deceittto act, with safety, in accordance with hi* inclinations. He is constantly lectured for doing the tfiingathat he ought not to do, and for leaving undone the thingsho ought to do. In short, he is treated as a very naughty and partly irresponsible being. Now, this is profoundly unsatisfactory. But, then, he cannot help himself. Werehe to rise in arms and rebel, the probability is that a »tatßof things would be produced in bis house painful to contemplate. So he adopts what he conceives to be the wisest, a» it certainly i» the easiest, course, and bean his burden asquiotly and contentadly as he can. It is a significant fact, however, that the majority of men who are henpecked are,, by no means mcck — eicopt to their wives. Meet them, anywhere But in tlieic own hoaitt, and you will be startled by the loudness of their talk and their braggadocio. See them controlling their underlings, and you. may well be led into the belief that they are the most determined fellows— not to> say bullies— m existence. Possibly, you are made to feel that they would be dangerous men to pick a quarrel with,. that;it would bo most disagreeable to owe them a ten-pound note, which yon were not m a position to pay, and that you would rather be under their domination for a week than a month. Their harsh voices and violent gesticulations are calculated to cause people with weak nerves a good deal of uneasiness. It is rather pleasant than otherwise to accompany these men 10 their own homes and witness the metamorphose th«y undergo- upon entering the presence of their wives — to note how their voices moderate, how their gesticulation vanishes, how they look at their partners twice before they rcnture to speak once, and how, if they are confident enough to advance an opinion at all, they do so in thetendorost possible manner, restraining it, in effect, at once if they sco that it is not likely to meet with a favourable reception. You feel that s»ch a fellow is only being- treated according to his deserts,, and sre much gratified to discover that, after all, ho has a weak side. A few such revelations go a long way towards convincing people that noisy bullying men ore not really tha most to be feared, inasmuch m when they encounter opposition they quietly truckle under. But it is not, unfortunately, given to all people to sco henpecked husbands under their various aspects. To those who only see them in their domestic character, tho spectacle afforded is neither edifying nor pleasing. The most superficial student of human nature can tell in about five minutes how matters stand. If you hen* a. woman prefacing, a contradiction to a statement of her husband's, by an emphasized " my dear," you may be tolerably certain, that he? honeyed words ore but tho prelude to- something nasty; were any doubt existing in your roiucf, th« behaviour of the being addressed would at once dissipate it. Or, if the husband's Christian name is used, in a certain manner, it may be taken for granted that it is merely the presage of a most unpleasant speech. She can telegraph to him, from one end of the table to the other, that his tie is crooked, that ho has got on that waistcoat which is her peculiar detestation, that he is not sitting in his chair properly, and" that ho is, altogether, making a perfect exhibition of himself, without any one (unless she is closely watched) being the wiser ; though the poor man's discomfort is increased by tho fact that ho imagines all piesent see what is going on, and are merely prevented by their good tasto from laughing outright at him. She causes him to writhe in his seat by frown - ing disapproval of the manner in whick he- is carving, or addressing his right hand neighbour to> the- neglect of hit left. The consequence is that he says very little, and what little he daes say he does not say very well, being constantly in fear of contradiction. The chances are that he is restricted as to the quantity of wine he may drink ; that lie is not allowed to smoke, or, if he persist* in that — as sho puts it — nasty habit, he must go into the garden, or some equally pleasant place on a winter's evening ; and that ho hns to attend lectures and the opera, when he would rather stay at home. Of course ho must allow her to choose his friends for him, can only invite such to his house when she is complaisant, nnd may never pay themvisits to their homes except when she it perfectly willing to let him do so. If, owing to her taking an unnecessarily long time adorning herself, they are very late in arriving anywhere, he must be content to take the full blame upon his shoulders. If he happonss to be unfortunate in his business, he is told on every opportunity, that he is little less than an idiot, that she could do far better, and that, were it not for her, he would go headlong to ruin. Tl»p most serious evil that arises from a man being henpecked by his wife is that his children learn to despise him. B3 -and-bjo they treat him as cavalierly as does thoir mother j ami attach no nnportar.ee to anything that he says. The consequence 11 that he ultimately becomes a nonentity in hit own houv, and is regarded by those who should be nearest anil dearest to him in the light of an encumbrance.

In Philadelphia there lives a doctor so lean and attenuated that the subriquet of " Old Bonei " is far from being a mis* nonier. Tin* doctor has a student, and that student it trying his best to become a doctor. lie attends to the officewhile the doctor attend* to the out-door patients. Amang other fixtures of the office is a weird skeleton, so lump and adjusted that it will walk out of the cupboard whore it is kept, and by manipulating it rightly, it can bo wado to go. through »everal grotosque antics. One day, while the student BAt poring o\ or some medical work, the street door opened* and a youthful pedlar with a basket of niok-nackt presented himself. When told that nothing in lijs line was wanted, the little rascal began to "talk back," in a roost impudent manner, and was finally ordered to leave the office. This ho refused to do, and thinking to scare him, the student palled a Ht ring, and open flew the door where the skeleton was hidden, and that emblem of death sprang out at the boy, who, frightcuod half out of his >vits, dropped his backet mid scampered out of the office, taking up a position on the o,)posile side of the street to await further eTents. Just then the doctor, " Old Boned," came from his study, and learned the cause of the uproar, he went to the door and motioned to the boj to ennw and >»< t ln« wim i — " No yon don't," b* Lulled out. ' 1 Vnow \ou ll >ou bate not \mir clothes on."