IRREPRESSIBLE PAT.
A writer of Random Notes in the New Zealand Tablet says : There is a fund of humour in your Irishman that nothing can stamp out ; adversity cannot crush it, nor misfortune overcome it, and under all circumstances and at all times—unconsciously, it may be—will it float to the surface. I remember some few months since seeing the prospect of as pretty a light as ever gladdened the heart of a Donnybrookian, spoiled by this undercurrent making itself visible at the wrong time. A countryman of mine, but one who had evidently arrived at maturisy before the enactment of compulsory education, was holding forth successfully against the denominational system of education. I say successfully, for though Lindley Murray had been murdered, and Dr. Johnson strangled over and over again, his logic and line of argument was of such a nature as fairly to non plus his more matter-of fact adversary. Tho arguments on both sides, if hot convincing, were decidedly forcible, and the probability was momentarily increasing of there being a " striking illustration" accompanying them. The point under discussion was the compensation to be awarded to teachers, which Pat either could not or would not understand; and vainly did his opponent strive to make him comprebend that payment was by results. The battle niged fiercely, and opinions more candid that complimentary were interehaigcd ; but just as the accommodating host was about to clear tho decks for action, a ch.uigc came over the complexion of affairs, and one for which Pat alone was accountable. His face, which :\ moment before had been swayed, suddenly underwent a change and, with a smilo and a wink which conveyed a world of meaning, ho said : " Oh, begorra, I see now what your driving at; you mane that they'll be paid according to their usefularity !" This was Too much ; and the hearty burst of laughter which greeted the birth of i7iis stranger was taken by Pat as a concession that ho had floored his antagonist—as, indeed, he completely had—and the, contending parties called the usefularity" of the landlord into requisition by paying tribute to Pacchus.
THE JUMPING FROG. Tho American Indians are known to be excellent runners, being almost able to match tho swiftest horses. Tho bull-frog of American swainp3 is also well known for its surprising power of leaping, often compassing three yards at one leap. In order to make a trial of its powers, some Swedes laid a wager with a young Indian, that he could not overtake a full-grown bullfrog, provided it had two leaps in advance. They caught one in a pond, and earned it into a field at some distance, where applying a burning faggot to its tail, the irritated animal bounded across the field towards the pond as fast as it could, the Indian following with all his might. The race was however no match ; tho frog had regained the pond before the Indian was within many yards of it.
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Westport Times, Volume VIII, Issue 1164, 3 April 1874, Page 4
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491IRREPRESSIBLE PAT. Westport Times, Volume VIII, Issue 1164, 3 April 1874, Page 4
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