TOLD ON LAMBTON-QUAY.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume XVI, Issue 5215, 28 December 1895, Page 3

TOLD ON LAMBTON-QUAY.

[By The Anoiest Mariner.]

" And thus sjiah on that ancient man, The bright-eyed mai'tHcr."—Coloridgo.

Wei, lixoton, Thursday,

TiiE TWIRI, Of THE TOXGIJE. A lady, whose pttrae is more elegant thaii lier powers of speech, V is ail ardent amateur gardener, and is particularly fond o£ railing out tlio Greek, Latin and othor names which scientific gontlemou have given to even the commonest of our gftwlen shrubs. ' This lady is passionately fond of roses, and possesses quite a collection of roso trees, and knows ihoir various names; tho trouble is that she cannot utter her words distinctly. The other day, while viowiug a friend's garden, sho saw a rose which she greatly admired, and turning to her friend, she was heard to say, " I does like that Madame I3edad roso you'vo got." The friend could not associate tho name with any rose in the garden; and begging tho lady's pardon, askod lier which roso slio meant. She, feeling that she had not correctly pronounced the name, improved upon her first effort, by calling the unfortunato flower, tho "Madame Blackguard Rose." lt : was only after the particular plant, was pointed out, did tlio friend rcalthat the 11 Madarno Bernrd" was fcthe name of the captivating rose.

THE FLORISTS' KOCICTV

Although Wellington possesses somo choice thongli siniill gardens, and in spito of tlio fact thst tlio youth and beauty of the City, parade the streets with lovely "buttonholes," and so proclaim their admiration of Rowers, the Society which oxists for the benefit of the amateur gardens and tho friends of flowers—tlio Horticultural and Florists' Society—is slowly dying from loss of vitality. To keep this Society in robust health, 300 subscribing members aro wanted, but the Society can boast of 100 only, It is not the fee which deters members from joining, as this is only ImlE-a-guinea a year, and carries with if, all the privileges ono could desire. The root of the evil, is the unpardonable indifference of the bulk of tho community. So long as a handful of persons show somo zeal, and slave in the interests of the Society and tho City, they may do so; the public do not eare a snap of tho and will not help them; yet majority of ns profess great admiration for dowel's. The Secretary of the Horticultural Society has made a pathetic appeal for support, but he is not likely to receive any encouragement, The only excuse one can offer for the indifference displayed by the public is that business is dull. A CADGEII COI.UI'SES.

The holiday season has brought into the city the usual complement of country visitors, who seem to be tlio special prey of two classes of our community—the mendicants and the pick-pockets, The regular streetcadger knows his way about and can spot a country bumpkin with remarkable quickness, and taken on the whole the street mendicant who slicks you up for the price of a meal, generally wants the money for a swipo. There knocks about tho streets of Wellington a cadger with!

one leg—the other took leave of the t rest of his anatomy through an acciIjftnt caused, is is said by an overdose whiskey—and on Christmas Evo he was propped up against the wall near one of the main thoroughfares seeing what he could see, and revolving'in his mind ways and means of obtaining the stuff for a long-sleever, when two men apparently from the 1 country stood close by liiin engaged in conversation. This was the sort of chanco that occurs at rare intervals, and he felt quite sure he saw the opportunity of raising, it may be half-a-crown, cortainly not less than

a tanner. Ho began the story unusually retailed to strangers from the 1 country, " Beg your pardon gents, I lost ono leg—" He was given no opportunity to proceed further, for one of the country bumpkins appealed to rotorted " I am sorry, old chap, but - we didn't happen to seo it in our travels." The cadger collapsed, and with a withering look at tho two gentlemen, picked up his cratch and moved on,

SENTIMENTAL THIEVES. The city is just now invested with a gang of clever pick-pockots who WttDm to have a special crazo for the jfliQckots of ladies. Quite a number of ''women have within the last few days

been relieved of their purses, and in

somo instances the thieves have made really good hauls, The only commendable feature about the pickpockets—that is if there is anything one can commend—is their gallantry, which shows itself in a modified form, as tho following will illustrate. A lady to relieved of her purse, which, with its contents, money and

a steamer ticket was extracted from her pocket in an artistic fashion. Tbe financial loss was looked upon as irrecoverable, but- there was a clmnce of making good the lost ticket, 60 next day the fair victim went to tho Union Steam Shipping Company's Office to see if she could at least avoid the double payment of her passage. There she met with a surprise, for the Company actually bad lier original ticket waiting for her. Tho thief had carefully posted it to the Manager, and his reason for doing so Was certainly a sentimental one, for ho could have destroyed it, and so avoided all risks of detection. The ticket being in a lady's name, 4guld not of couise be used by the «!ck-pocket and Ins pals, but his gal" could have been provided v with a cheap excursion ticket, The lady was more than pleased to receive her ticket, and was half disposed to forgive the thief for stealing the rest of tho contents of her purse. CimrSTMAS DEIIUTAXTES, In the winter months when dancing is tbe favourite amusement, wo invariably look for the fair debu-

tantes at the variuusballs, Girls in their teens, pretty in face, manners a and dress, present themselves to the V Ray world of society, and proclaim, in fact, tliat they stand on the tliroshold awaiting the call to embark in matrimony, Some of these fair daughters of Eve quickly find thoir murk, others linger on season after season finally to retire io the shelf. The debutanto is an object of study and vague contemplation, but her clmnces ofsuccess avo ordinarily fair. At Christmas time also we have our ■\ - . Wlo the prospects arc altogether pliiin, Tho Christmas debutantes are boys in .their teens, and they mako.thoirdebut in tholitiuorßliops, ■This Christmas Wellington has supplied a very fair proportion, of prospective boozora,Bwipers and drunken criminals, Youngsters from seventeen to' twenty, years of age could ' J have been eeon on Christmas Evo v - • jaiTying'a Bkin-fqll of liquor, und

reeling about ns dvunk as over they Could bo. Tlieir first olfort at " razzlo-dazzlo," anil if wo could bo certain it would bo their wo could possibly oxeuse them, but it is wholly against common sonse to suppose that all tlioso boys will remain sober for the rest of their days. fair proportion of them go down hill, and become a burden to themselves and (o their relatives and friends. Christmas would Le excellent if wc could suppress the boy-swipers who mnko tlieir first appearance at this festive season of the year.

CHRISTMAS STOIIIKS. Christmas has special features for all trades and professions, Tlio bakers, butchers, grocers, and tho othor tradcs-pcoplo ■ who cater for the inner man, manage to do a roaring trade for the fow days preceding tho high day of Christians. The toyshops and vendors of nick-nacks also find this period of the year profitable. Newspapers, too, liavo to bo "in tlio swim " at Christmas time, and their special lino is stories. Christmas stories, good, bad, and indifferent, original and pirated, may be seen in nearly all tho periodicals and daily papers of tlio Colony. The weekly papers, of course, givo more attention to this class of literature, and by giving a few pounds in prizes manage to securo a good budget of yarns. Tlio main object of the writers is to got a prize, but not a few of them are quite satisfied if their stories are printed even if they do not get a red cent for their composition. There is an indescribable charm in getting into print, and somo people will do anything to get there. Story-writers have their own methods of producing copy, but somo of tho past-masters of the art grind it out to order. I'or instance, it is said of a firm of publishers up north that tliey recently imported a thousand illustration blocks that did scrvicein some of tho English papers. Every week ten or a dozen of theso blocks aro picked out and handed to tlio regular story-writer, with instructions to wcavo a yarn to fit the illustrations, and the yarn-maker carries out the contract in a masterly manner. There is much tocommend this system of providing literaturo for giddy girls and gay old men; tho writer haying tho incidents snpplieil is able to hang the threads together without much trouble.

BOMBAY MAKERS. The average Wellingtonian dearly loves a holiday, for then he packs into a kit a few edibles, marshals the missus and the kids, and betakes himself and them either by rail or steamboat for a few hours spell beyond the reach of the wind, dust, dirt, and variegated stinks of the City. Boxing-day saw the usual crowd taking the usual methods of enjoying themselves. The Wellington railway stations present a lively spectacle when an excursion train is about to leave. The minute or two before the train leaves there is displayed an amount of human eneigy, which, if itwerepossibletocompress and store-up for use, would be suflicient to drive an ocean greyhound many knots. The traffic on the Wellington-Wairarapaline is always heavy 011 holidays, but an ollicial with a greed for statistics Ims kept a careful record of a year's passenger traffic, and the results worked out show that the average number of passengers arriving and departing from the City by the WellingtonJiketahuna line exceeds 1300 per day, which must bo admitted is not a bad average,

watching tub cm coi;.\m. I Wellington is, without exception, I believe the heaviest rated city in New Zealand, and there are prospects that, the rates will he materially increased in the near future. Tet Wellington is notoriously the most ill-kept-, dirty, and dingy-look-ing city in the Colony. The only set-off of any value that can bo placed against the heavy rates, is the magnificent water supply, which is not equalled by the water-works of any other town in New Zealand. Bar this luxury, there is nothing to show for the crushing rates that we have to bear, No doubt in timo we shall have a serviceable drainage scheme, but by the time it is completed a few inoro pence must be added to tho rates, and it is not unlikely that more money will have to be raised to complete tho job. Attention is being drawn to the apparent mismanagement of our municipal affairs, and Mayor Fisher will have plenty to do during his term of office. It is quite evident that there is negligence or incompetence somewhere, and " Our Georgo" may bo trusted to discover where the rottenness exists, ft the stable is not cleaned out very soon, we shall see a Municipal Reform Association formed to watch over the interests of ratepayers, and to effect muchneeded reforms, There is plenty of scope for such an Association, and its existence would be of real benefit, to tho City. SEDHOx's JOB.

Thero is in some quarters, a good deal of amazement at the Hon, 11. J. Scddon appointing Richard John Seddon as a member of the Realisation Board under the Bank Act of last session, Apart from the political iniquity of the thing, tho Hon. Richard can show no single qualification fitting Jiim for the billet. While some people are amazed at. tho Premier's audacity, there are others again who are delighted over the job, for they see in it the beginning of tbe end. The delighted ones j say that Scddon, who, if rejected by' his constituents and not returned to Parliament, would practically have no reliable income, in taking this job is preparing for tho inevitable. The days of Dick Seddon as Premier are numbered, and no one realises this more fully than Richard Seddon, hence the job on tho Realisation Board; hence W. P. Reeves' promotion to tho AgentGeneralship and Sir Patrick's to the Judgeship. TheSeddon Minis try will soon burst,