TOLD ON LAMBTON QUAY.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume XVI, Issue 5068, 4 July 1895, Page 2

TOLD ON LAMBTON QUAY.

[By The Ancient Mariner,]

" And thus spake on that ancient man, The bright-eyed -maWneft''—rColoridge. Wellington, Tue^k, " THE HERMIT OF ISMXD mSJf A moat inhospitablo "looking' localityistb.it known as "Round-the-Rocks," at Island Bay; bleak, wind-blown and craggy, it is nevertbcless ranch frequented by the people of Wellington and visitors to the Empire City. There is a real attraction about tho spot apart from its wild picturcsqueness and marine aspect, for in one of the many chasms well sheltered from storm and tempest, a forlorn individual has taken up his abode and is known far and near as " Tho Hermit of Island Bay." Whether the man is actt wl by a desire for seclusion and obscurity, or whether it is a subtle device for obtaining notoriety I cannot say, still consciously or otherwise, tho Hermit Ims become a celebrity, and is probably honored by more visitors during the year, than any other individual in the community. The Hermit and

liis cavo form one of the main attractions of Wellington, and no visitor to the City can claim to have 'jftpno the sights" if ho Ims failed may his respects to the Hermit. It would

be interesting, if it were possible, to calculate the amount of money that is yearly expended in viewing the Hermitage. Cabs, trams, and oinnibusses all derive a certain income through the existence of this modern cave-dweller, and Welling- v tonians nro not unmindful of the " obligation he has placed upon them. Mark the line and cry that was raisod when there was a possibility of his domain being demolished, when the famous Queen's Drive was being constructed last year. Tho Hermit pays.no rent, and has no fear of his landlord: on tho contrary, tho gentleman who owns the fee-simple of the cave takes a generous interest in tho wellbeing of his lonely tenant, and ,'f would not evict him upon any consideration, nor yet would he allow anyone else to disturb him, As I have said, we are fully conscious of our obligations to tho Hermit, but what annoys us ifjttie fact that we cannot show ciation in any practicable or smable maimer. We cannot banquet him, forhewon'tboslnffcd,andap|)arently prefers bread and water to " chicken and cham " ; make him a presenta- . tion of a thousand guinea, purse, and ' , you convert him into a professional j politician; give him a seat in the Legislative Council, and ho is at once robbed of his distinction as a hermit, and his usefulness as a ' show." 1 can sec no way out of tho difficulty, and the old fellow will e;o down into his grave without over

knowing what a benefactor lie lias been to Wellington, and hew

thoroughly bis services are appreciated. It is a maddening thought, * but it is worse to rollout that when the patriarch is laid low we have no one to take his place, to fill up that vacuum at Island Buy. A MORi: I'ATIIKTC HERMIT. Although we have not taken the precaution to have a hermit in training, which is culpable negligevjjioii our part, there was within th™iit few days an attempt made at Tliorndon to manufacture nn involuntary » specimen, until the police stepped in and cut llic game short. This latter is, however, no subject for banter, for the case of the youth, Charles Skae, is pitiable in the extreme. Ho came from England a few months ago, attracted possibly by the prospects held out by a Liberal Government. Friendless, of weak intellect and deformed, be found it a hard battle, and was driven to seek shelter i in an excavation on ut bill at tlio back of Tinakori lload. He is now in the Benevolent Homo, where ho can make certain of tlirco meals a day and a warm bed at night. Charles Skae has prayed unmistakably that Thoi'iidon is not a suitable locality for a Hermit; the residents in the neighbourhood have no love for the romantic, and are too practical and business-like to encourage cave-dwellers to live in idleness. But life has its limits, and thero will, J sooner or later, be a vacancy for a Hermit at Island Hay, and theitit may suit the purpose of sonieoijfth qualify for the position. A DAmiXG MAM, OK MGHT. Let not the reader, howoyer, get lianslixed with the idea that tlio Hermitage and that other domain of fossilised ccccntricity.thcLegislativo Council, are the only natural curiusitics wc have to show visitors, for ) what is in its way a greater sight than either lias yet to be dealt with, 1 refer to the Colonial Museum, which compared .with similar institutions in the other largo centres is a disgrace to the Umpire City. The exhibits in the Wellington Museum are demoralised with dust; the tickets giving explanatory notes of the specimens on view are discolored with ago;tho building is inadequate for the pur- t poses for which it was intended, and dually the staff, consisting of one man, is not largo enough to give the necessary attention to tlio work of looking after the place. There are several eminent persons connected

with tho Musoum, as, for instance, Sir James Hector, who has quito as many billets as thetremier; flbn we have Mr Masked whose liflßf lies in the dirccjfl of bugs ml beetles; and » the analyst, for ever pound^^A w ith and mortar, the.back, attached tbey arJ^^^^^^^^f upon^^^^^^H who to be f^^^^^H as P at <^^^^^^^| circumstau^^^^^^^H museum > s^^^^^^^| lines; fp_^^^^^^H taxi(lenni^J^^^^^^H| and J^^^^^^^^^^H cliristcnii^^^^^^H^^H^ a roon^^^^^^^^^^^H with aU^^^^^^^^^^^H the A umlilic^^^^^^^H^^^^^H deal o !_^^^^^^^^^H stag^^^^^^^^^^^^H state wc^^^^^^^^^^^^H lington itself, mens never bring which I fancied speoialrj^^^^^^^^^^H The 'iN^H^^^l

sociable, very big, and very hungry, aud the persistency with which they let yon know of their hunger is most annoying; thoy should to bo turned out of the institution,

THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF A TIiIEGIIAM. rA telegram is an important affair to us all; we send and receive telegrams with a certain amount of circumspection, firstly because of cost, and secondly because of urgency, and if some of the telegrams could speak wo should hear some funny tales. I givo hero an autobiography of a tolegram, and itimiy possibly interest your readers. " The missus lay ill "in tho little whare away back, tho " boss becoming anxious, rode into "Ekelahuna aud scut me off to " Pahiatua to fetch the doctor. The "telegraph clerk coded mo, and " away 1 scooted to Woodvillo, the " operator there bundled mo off to " Palmerston North, there I was " throttled and sent flying along to " Wellington. 1 was nearly blown off " the wires in the Empire City, hut "a considerate operator after " allowing me to glance at Port "Nicholson Harbour, sent me " Hying along to Jlasterton, where 1 " was t'ingcrly handled, but quickly " despatched to Pahiatua. .1 found

"the Doctor's house, but the doctor " was fetched before J could reach «" him. The boss thinking I was up "to some larks,rodc from Ekctahuna "to Pahiatua aud got the doctor " himself. 1 had to travel over 800 "miles while the boss went 17, is it " any wonder then that ho beat me '{ "Now, I desire to know if I have " any right of action for damages "against the Telegiaph Department "for playing the fool with me and " lowering my rcpulatiou for s)r cd '{ "Cannot I compel them to provide "me with a shorter route when I "have to travel again between the " two places \ " It does seem ridiculous ihatbetween two places so close together as Ekctahuna and Paliiafua are, tliatj it should be necessary for a tolegram to travel so many hundred miles toj get from one place to the other, i There is, of course, no direct; telegraphic communication between j the townships named, and never will j be, unless the Department is stirred I up with a telegraph pole. Tliej excuse hitherto has been that the!

railway was being made, and until

, the truck was cleared, and nil danger ■yf bush lilts was uvcr, it would lie f folly to put up the wires; bill this will not do now, at itny into Mr is not sutislied with the excuse, and as the railway formation is now fairly advanced, he is rousing up the Commissioner of Telegraphs. Kkotahuna and Paidntim may therefore hope for better things. I'AIISOXS AXP C.US. The Bank of New Zealand's "wild-cat" meows about the precincts of the Parliamentary Buildings. The monster can be heard at nil hours of the day ami night, llonoiablc members do not like it, neither do a good many others who are not in the professional line of legislators. Tho music of that sleep disturber has penetrated the country, and the parsons mindful of the welfare of their Hocks arc protesting against the existence of this " wild-eat," Members of the House ontepresenlntivcs

and Legislative Councillors arc being ««oniinunicated with by parsons, jjSmrincipally of the non-conformist protesting against the disposal of html by lottery or gambling in any shape or form, and Ministers have been fairly warned that if they favour any gambling Bill, more particularly the Bank of New Zealand Lottery Scheme, they will incur the displeasure and severe opposition of the whole non-con-formist body, which is too poweiful for even Ministers to sneeze at. The parsons have made some of the Ministerial followers "situp "and contemplate the prospects. The Bank of New Zealand's " wild-cat" will receive a very warm reception when it makes its appearance in the House, and although the bogie cry of another guarantee is being raised, the chances of the Bill getting through are very poor. I'l'.x'oiiTll w sou I'.

Wellington is expanding ; new buildings arc going up on all sides, some in brick and some in limber, and more aro in contemplation. In the midst of this seeming prosperity there is it vast amount of poverty. silent poverty, in (W many homes in this city starvation is tho order of the day, but so quiet are they, that the dispensers of charity are obliged to seek them out. The suti'crei's want work and not charity, they seek the former and hesitate to accept the hitler. A Committee of charitable ladies and [ gentlemen, organised by the Rev. W. A. Evans, is doing good work amongst the poor, anil carrying it out in a methodical but. inoffensive manner. The idea of charity is kept well in the background, and the recipient of food and clothing pay for the same according to their means, This Committee is nearly ready with a scheme for a " soupkitchen," and when this is established Wellington will be a little more like f Loudon. The Governor's speech, with its glowing account of tho lifting of the depression, and the return of prosperity, does not tally with our experience. The poverty to be met with in the Empire City is us pitiable as it is serious, and the distress will increase with the severity of the I' ":chen in tis sad ist have dubbed mntry," ken bis i, for to mtry is bly acithat a formed, ig to be young re lady There fashion iris are y of tho a order, 1 they we the ackets" ts," and athletic rls have to get herefore create a 8 ladies hat the bamboo vention, i formsd as only '. The bamboo bike has aluminium fittings, and is sa,itl to bo light and strong. TUB CITV MARKET. t! You good people in the <xrantry can help US' to secure a decent

market in the City, if you only cared to put yourselves to the trouble. It would bo as much to your advantago as to ours. Your produce could then be sold direct to the consumer, and the middlemen who are mostly "uncleanOhowsfroni the Celestial Empire" would suffer. The City Council is disposed to spend £3,000 upon such a building, but the Council is rather long winded in such matters and needs to he pressed into action. If you country folk will but press the button we will do the rest, and we shall both gain by the transaction. You will get better prices for your produce and wo will get more wholesome fruit and vegetables, and ] am sure the hens will be considerate enough to lay cheaper eggs, under the circumstances. Shop'nns are dear and treacherous!