BREVITIES.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume XI, Issue 3475, 2 April 1890, Page 3

BREVITIES.

Borough Council. Consideration .of defect in school closets. Bonus to be given t r sinking.of artesian well. Mr Renall's flutning to bo torn up, Great mennce to the town. Mormon gathering on Friday, Good thing for business men of Masterlon.

Natives purchased yesterday a dressed bullock, twenty sheep, <fcc, from local butcher. Mr-J. L. Toole, the wellknown comedian, with his company, has arrived nt Adelaide. Mr David Christie Murray at Te Oro Ore. Much impressed with civilisation of natives, Considerable discussion in Wellington with reference to the operation of tho 0. D. Act. Ministers objecting. lUs estimated that the loss of life by the recent cyclone will amount to about 200. Dolan ;•" Sure an' 01 can't foind tk j matches." Nelly: "Thin a loight and Ink for tlu'm, like fflpsiblo person," in a Dunedin paper the following advertisement recently appeared: "Wanted, young lady for illusion; must be ■ good figure," Ought these words to be read in sober truth, asks a contemporary, "Wanted, young lady for a month's mellifluous illusion and subsequent chronic disillusionment!" Some young, men, bantering a fat man, said : " If all flesh is grass, you must be a load of hay." " I suspect I kid," replied he, "from tho way tho asses aro nibbling at me." "Mamma, mayn't I go out for a bit J The boys says there's a comet." " Well, yes; but don't go too near." " Golly!" gasped little Johnny, as ho finished the second crock of stolen preserves! " I feel as if I had been Bmoking pa's pipe," Violet:" Ma, how do peoplo know it's a man in the moon ?" Mother (sadly): "Because it's always out at nwhts." _■':' Bridget, did you get tho flowers that I am to wear' to-night in my hair?" "Yea,moui,but——" "But what!" "I've mislaid the hair, mom," Archdeacon Btrelcb, of Victoria, is Jl'ie Sydnoy Smith of the Antipodes. "So was once being bothered by a Brical bore named Cnss. Mr Cass Tad one '.'fad"—that the great Napo'eon'was of 'Scriptural descent, Pressed for his reason, he explained that "Napoleon"- with the initial letter cut.off gave ''Apolcon"«r " Apoljyon," a name prominent in the Rovelfjfron, " Ah," replied the archdeacon, " your own name,' Cass,' with the initial letter cut off gives 'A6S,' but there's no revelation iu that." He: " What would you say, dear, if I should say that you were a harp of a thousand airings," Sho: "Ishould think, love that you were a lyre," The worst case of selfishness on record is that of a jouth who complained because bis mother put a ljftv mustard plaster on his younger brother than she did on him. Smith: " We'l, Robinson, what do you think of the Mammoth Cave'?'' Robinson; "I was disappointed in it aB a hole," '