BREVITIES.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume XI, Issue 3452, 6 March 1890, Page 2

BREVITIES.

Fine. ... . Pleasant weather.. ■ "• Football sensoa coming."' School Committee in a fix, Give the poor dog a bone! Santloy created great impression In Blenheim. Man dropped dead after hearing him.

Dramatic Society to be formed in ; Carterton. Mastercouians, go ye and h \o likewise. "i£

Masfcortou doing wellattho Fire Brigades' Demonstration, Our telegram says; " Ladder rescue for two men, Hnsterton last."

11 Anythiug in Court this morning' Sergeant?" "No; not likely to be, sir, everything is dead ! dead! I dead!!! ' '

Judge to prisoner! •• Hive yon v i anything to say for your defenco ?" ' "No, my dear, judge; dispose of ,- s me as if it were your own baae."? / \<&£' A brule named Frederick Jones,'* ; and one with whom he lus boen cohabiting, named Jane Lee, arrested in Christchurch for grossly ill-treating children of the latter,

" What is that young man's name?'' " Wtiat young man, papa?"" The one who stayed till after twolvo o'clook," "■ His name is William, papa," " Bill, for short?" " I suppose so," " Well, it isn't complete." " Not corapleto i" " No, it ought to bo Gas Bill for short I" And tho old man went down the cellar, and held the lantern up to the meter onco more. '..■' ■; i!

. Marriage a failuro 1 At the Central Criminal Court, Sydney, N.vS.W,, on Thursday, Charles Augustus Wilkinj pleaded guilty to a charge of having gone through I lie form of marriage, with Elizabeth Purves on November. 11, 1889, his wife, ?i« Elizabeth Houghton, to whom he was married on June 10, 1872, at Hotham, Victoria, being then aliw, Ho wan sentenced to throe years' imprisonment with hard labour,

Impecunious Man, not far from'' "s'Masterton: " I wish you would bo so ■ kind as to lend mo five pounds. I'll pay you back in a few days." Candid Friend: "If yon had asked me for. • the loan in it candid, straightforward , : manner, I would havo lent you tho money, bat asking me in the way yon -. did causes me to distrust you." Itri- ■'■■ • peotinious Man: "I don't understand yon." Candid Friend: " You asked mo to bo so kind as to lend you five pounds," Impecunious Man; "Yes," Candid Friend: "If.you had been candid you would have said to mo: " Bo so stupid, be such an ignominious ass, such a hopeless idiot, as to lend me five pounds," and you might have got it," A rich widow in Aiken, S.C, felt ;< a pity for a poor dwarf that she - married Mm, We have always heard that pity was Aiken to love, ' "If," said.a dswn town school >;;> teacher to a very bad little girl in school, "if you don't behave yourself ■' -■ I'll write a note to your father,". .., " Well," said the child "if you write \yi a note to him my mother will get f jealous."

The plunger Benzon, now in prison at Nice, has broken down completely, According to despatches from that place on Jan, 30, he weeps bitterly in his cell owing to being unable! to/' secure .liis roleaso, and extreme penitence! The trial of his case lias been postponed, Not as nice as thepoorboyoxpeetedl