An Amusing Story.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume X, Issue 3096, 5 January 1889, Page 3

An Amusing Story.

Tbe Melbourne tbealrioul correspcndttt of the t'tugo Daily Times ■ relate* tbe following amusing story: —lt is quite [ißßiblo ihui a good many'of My readers may not believe this story, but ii is remarkably true. There was an enthusiastic meeting of Bohemians not long ago, and the. wine that was not rosy went round many times. One well-known comedian had got go mucli concealed on his person that it became necessary to Liu that he should go to sleep. During his slumber the other boys concocted a wild joke and proceeded to carry it out, The comedian whs carefully placed in bed, and his face Y was decorated with two beautiful ! black eyes, an imitated fractured pilose, and a bump on his forehead of which looked as if a traincnr had collided with him. The scenic artist of the company was responsible for them. A piece of court plaster was placed over the imitation nasal fracture, and another piece over the mouth gumming both lips together. A 6tranger to the victim was then enticed to become a doctor, and tbe fun began. The pmty grouped themselves around the bed in mournful attitudes, and one nf them proceeded cautiously to waken him. As he opened his eyes his friend felt his pulse and said," Now, don't exert joui'6elf, and don't try to talk. The doctor cays you will bo all right if you remain quiet." The victim was jsoiugtba'sk what wa? the matter, mien he folt that his mouth was ,/flosed up, and bis lips felt as if they belonged to an elephant, By. this time it was all one of the jokers could do to keep from laughing, so biding his face in his handkerchief ho sobbed aloud, and said, "Great

Jjaavens, boys, this is 'horrible!" :> Attbis the footer go! up, and,lookup iiig hopefully at the patient, said, ".Dou't. lie downhearted, ray boy. If you dou't Ret excited we'll pull you through. I hare qured worse mso3." Then lie took a pair of scissors aud gently out tlio court plaster on the lips,' "Intro, bow do you feel sow. Don't talk much, but don't you feel relieved?" he asked. The victim looked at the doctor, and then at the sorrowful company, and said, " For heaven's sake toll me what has happened to mo.'' The doctor agian told him to be quiit, and then whispered, "You have had the worst fight any man ever had and lived. You were attacked .going home by a rotber, but you defended yourself well, although it was a hard struggle. See here is the hand glass; look for yourself, there is contusion of the brain, the eyes are dislocated, and I thought your jaw was broken, but. as you can speak I guess it is only fractured." The victim took p long,-look at himself, and the first thing he said was* ''ls the other fellow alive ?"' This nearly broke IL the boys up, but they kept their $( faces, and the doctor replied that the otberman was alive, butbis'was the worst" case be had over sewed upOne arm was broken, ouqeyeou l ., and lie looked generally as if ho had fallen from a balloon. • The. victim smiled a ; happy emile to'know that jjo {$ miW, '''ilifl Wss'Mw<

i'lio'ii' tlii up/i dJked hud no mi. messages bofore tliey left,-r.dtukin another pitiful, lock iu the glass, h, said, with a sort of sob, '"Telegrap. for my wife." 'I his was too uuiu and one huge roar went round ti. .•ooin. In live minutes tlw paint an pastor were off, and Mie viutiiu »i< .willing to kill soma of those liuln .uiiius very' badly. •