THE LATE ERUPTION.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume VIII, Issue 2355, 24 July 1886, Page 1 (Supplement)

THE LATE ERUPTION.

• A PATHETIC INCIDENT. The following graphic account of the adventures of a family named Jones during the recent eruption of .Jonm. Tarawera is from theFutngitikei Advocate : "THIM THEER GUK.S," TO THE EDITOR. Sir,—While the cannonading on the part of Tarawera was at its height on Thursday morning, June 10th, there whs great alarm in many a home: but very indeed was the tsoublo

in the domicile of Edwaid Peter John Jones, of C—lltown. Mrs Joues is h woman of very large proportions, but inclined to nervousness, Like the startled hare, Mrs Jones keeps eyes, ears and nose open for the ■ detection of troubles in the present or misty future. It wis no wonder, then, that when Tarawera began in real euruest to thump and bump she should he awake and ready for the worst. For a few minutes she listened to the ominous noises, and then she addressed herself to the nearly impossible task of awaking Joriesi. " Jones I Jones I Jones 1 Does ye 'ear tbim theer guns'l" she shouted. " What guns?" inquired Jonos. " Hai k I" said Mrs Jones, putting up her fin«er in the dark. '•Oh, them's Mrs Johnston's pigs grim tin' 'cause they're cold" suggested Mr Jones.

" fl'm does pics displod" 1" tsked Mrs Jones sarcastically. " Does pigs when they're cold, an' lire cannon balls, an' kill 'elpless women and children, the same as is goin' on now ?"

•''Oenuinly," said Mr Jones, who was now awake, ami,wanted to go to sleep; " certainly they does; pigs is very awful things sometimes,"

"Oh-dear, oh dear, wailed Mrs Jone3, as Tarawera again spoke out boldly; "take mo somewhere to a safe place, Jones." " Where does yer want to go?" asked Jones in a tone of unconcern

"To the perlice! to the perlice!" "The perlice is millions of miles away by this time, if they've 'eard that. noise," answered Mr Jones.

" Oh, whatever shall.l do f inquired Mrs Jones, weeping copiously." " Go to sleep," was Jones' unfeeling advice.

" An' v/nkc up in (ho mornin' m dead as ut door nail, with my throat cut from year to year, I 'spose, Mr Jones; that's what yer want, I know." ; Mjnd where you're a-wastin' them blessed tears of your'n" said Jones; " they're a-dnupin'an'asplashingunto me, an' I'm gettin' as wet as a drowned rat. I a'int a tank for the perception of water, i"

" You're a cruel 'artless man, Jones, you aro," said Mrs Jones, between a tempest of sighs and sobs. I always thought yerwas,'an I knows it now. The lust young man I company with nays to me, ses lih, quite solemn like, ■• Sary," says he, always iieweer of a man as 'as nich a nose as Jones 'as; he'll trifle with yer 'oliest confections, and '

Bump, hum]), thump, hump shook the house.' '

" Jones, yer afeard, I know yer be; I can 'ear yer 'eart a-bumpin', right through yer back," said Mrs Jones, growing more afraid as the fact was proclaimed by Jones' central organ that he w«s getting shaky too,

" Yer needn't beafeaied of my'eart" he said; " it's purty well boxed up; it can't hurt yer.'' •' Are yer goin' to get out, Junes, an' see what that row is about ?"

" Ivofc if 1 knows it, I ain't," replied Jones. " Why, what are yer up to now!" he asked, as she ceased weeping, and began to turn up the sleeves dfher nightdress. " I'm a-goin to holler' Murder' till I bust, I am," she answered with appalling calmness. "No livin' female pusson can. stand 'caring thim theer guns and not faint or screech ' Murder.",'

'•Ain't it better to faint, Sary?" suggested Jones, kindly, fearing lest a "\:knior should bring the enemy to the hoiise.

But Mrs Jones was inexorable; fainting did not accord with the gravity of the situation, and when the next serifs of boom sounded out" Tumultuous murder" shook the midnight air," Thai the five jnvinile Joneses in the next room took up the refrain, and the hnl'V Jones lay still and listened, with his ears turned forwaid and mouth open for tho approach of the enemy. He hadn't long to wait. Some neighbors, who were out listening to the noises made by the eruption, thought a fearful tragedy was being enacted at Jones' house, and made for it "without delay, And Jones, through the ohinks as it were of the clamour, hoard a noise ot footsteps and voices approaching the house, and in a moment was bolt upright beside the yelling partner of his joy» and sorrows. Then he heard uhu front gate opened, the tramp of feet along the garden path, and a Jetcrmioed attempt was made to break oper. the front door. For a moment Jones thought of defending his home and hearth against the assailants, and dying like a brave soldier at his post; but that very soon passed away and a fierce desire for life took its place. Feeling that it was no use make his wife understand ihc portion, he determined to leave j hei* to her fate. So picking up the haly Jones, feet upwards, with a yell if ierror, that was fully echoed by the baby, he made for the back door, opened it, and rushed out,-us the rtiiemy broke in the front door. Then was seen a strange sight, A short man, with foxey whiskers and pugnose, short and a shorter shirt, mid number fourteen splay feet, entering along the muddy clay road •4 the rato of ton miles an hour, and carrying, by its clothes, an inverted and squalling baby. Had Jones not ■".aken the baby ho might have escaped. As it "as, hearing 'hat Jones' baby »vas retreating through the darkness at ■\ rale greatly in excess of the speed it might be supposed to attain now on its

feet, oven if it could walk—which it , could : hot. do—fc'wo\ : or three of the neighbors came to the conclusion that tho murderer was oarryihg off the baby, and bo. gavo chase, Now tho race;began in,real earnest. Jones' number fourteens were splashing up the mud in all directions, filling the baby's mouth, ears, and eyes, and bespattering its clothes, but longer legs than his' own were fast overhaul* ing him. As the pursuer!, gained upon him, Jones, in his terror, dropped the baby, hut he.was blown with carrying it, Fear was unnerving biui too; he felt that death was staring bim in the back. He heard' the quick breath of hig pursuers,- the splash of their feet close behind, and then a hand grasped his shirt collar, and the next thing he knew was that he was dowuintha mud on his back,.with one man kneeling on his stomach, another holding his feet, and a third holding him down ,by his foxey whiskers, Then a match was struck over his face, and he Baw that his captors were his three nearest neighbors, and they, in- astonishment, simultaneously, exolaimed, " Why, it's Jones." A word or two of explanation, and then Jones commenced the return journey, picking up the baby, which was still belching mud and water, and noise like a small crater. His only garment was stipking to his back; be was covered with clay from head to foot, and was as cold as a half dozen ioicles, And as hetiudged back through the mud, at every step of his number fourteens, he uttered an expletive, or an adjective, or an explosive, and muttered things not found in polite literature, If one now mentions the outbreak at Tarawera in his presence, Jones cuts it short by saying that" he doesn't want to 'ear nothiu' about volcanic corruptions." Yours, (fee, John Dobb.