THE "FATHER" OF THE BRITISH ARMY.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume 5, Issue 1310, 22 February 1883, Page 2

THE "FATHER" OF THE BRITISH ARMY.

* The honor of being the " father" of the British army is claimed for George Macdonald, Colonel of the Bedfordshire Regiment, who was born October 10,1784, and has therefore attained the patriarchal age of ninety-eight years. He entered the service in September, 1805, as an ensign in the 27th (Inniskillen) Regiment, which he almost immediately accompanied on the expedition to Hanover. In 180irfe joined the Army in Sicily, andflramployed with it until. 1810, umhich year he went' with an expedition to. Naples, and was present at the capture of Ischia and Procida. He returned to Sicily in 1811, and was employed there against the French army: In 1812 he proceeded to Spain and was engaged at the battle of Castalla and siege of Tarragona. He embarked for Canada in 1814, and took part in the operations before Plattsburgh, returning toEurope in time to take part in the campaign of 1815, and the battle, of /Waterloo,; in which-crowning victory he received k •three wounds—namely, in the leg, in the neck, and through the body, woundi ing the lungs. He was as Governor cf 'Sierra Leone, exposed to the deadly climate of West Africa, from 1841 to, 1845, and was afterwards Lieutenant' Governor of Dominjoa, .in the West Indies. He was, appointed Colonel of the 16th" (Bedfordshire)' Regiment'on February 13,1863, and attained tho rank-of General in.the army on October 25,1871.'- The great age to which this distinguished veteran hag, attained is more remarkable when his wounds at Waterloo and his exposure; to. the malaria of Sierra Leone—tli'attbotirne from which so few officials over 'return—are taken into consideration.— Times, ■' >■•

A SMART REPORTER "EUCHRES" A RETURNING OFFICER. • " The end must justify the means !" —lbid. We often read in American papers v small anecdotes having reference to the; cuteness of smart Yankee reporters when in quest of valuable information, ■ but rarely do we hear of New Zealand Pressmen distinguishing themselves in a like manner. However,, an instance came under our notice the other day, which would have delighted the heart of the managing editor of the Mo Ywk (jlippcr. It was the way in which an energetic reporter got the better of a disobliging, obstinate returning officer. It appears that in a certain seaport town in this colony there is a returning - officer for Harbor Board who has somo peculiar notions regarding the carryingout ,of his duties. In every other seaport but this particular town the poll is declared on the evening of the day oh which the Harbor Board elections take place, but the returning officer in makes it a practice to give the.returnon theday following. This, of ' course, does not suit the proprietor of the local morning paper, who, ..although he can publish next 'morning the results of all other elections of Harbor Boards in the colony, ■ is debaired from publishing the one ";"iikcly to be of most interest to his ■ v subscribers. Two years ago he saw the start of this absurdity, and although ■ 'the returning officer was reasoned with, • and threatened and coaxed in turn, it was all to no avail. He was adamant, Finding all his efforts to move the jTSforri official in the right direction were a disgusted pressman resolved resort to stratagem to obtain the information he required—the results of the polling for next day's paper, How ' this worthy scribbler (whom we shall designate Inkbottle) succeeded, we shall see anon. At the first election over which this officer presided, Inkbottle, ..by. an ingenious method, was able to secure within two or three votes, the number polled by each candidate, and the morning paper exultingly presented ' its readers with the result of the election six hours before the result of the poll was declared! Inkbottle jubilant— Ballotbox raving! He had to £tand the " chaff" of the whole town, and, to increase his rage, suggpstive inuendos were thrown out that he had betrayed the poll. He laid it all at Inkbottle's door, and mentally registered an oath that he would circumvent his cute friend next time; but 10, and behold! despite all Ballotbox's extra precaution, at the next election the journal represented by the ingenious Inkbottle was again in a position to give its readers tho result of the polling before the numbers were up, More " chaff" and more ravings, and again the evil-minded threw out their maddening suggestions that he had been bought over. He • knew not in what way to account for it. His staff of assistants like Caesar's wife, were " above suspicion," and to use a vulgarism, he was completely • !' flabbergasted," Again was the mental oath registered, again the election time came (the third), and again were the greatest precautions taken by the scrupulous Ballotbox to retain the secrets of the poll until such time as the stubborn returning officer should seo fit to disclose them to the public. On the day appointed for the polling, the astute Inkbottle met tho austere Ballotbox, "Ishall have the result in the morning's paper," said the man of news,, after the stereotyped words of greeting had been exchanged, "I think not, sir," returned the guardian of the ballot; " You have got the best of me twice, Mr Inkbottle, but (bridling up and forgetting his dignity for the nonce)" You will not' have' me a third time—if you do I'll—l'll—eat my'shirt!" and he pulled up his cellar with a jerk that threatened to dislocate his neck, " Very well," remarked '|nkbpttle,' "we shall see what we sha]l see, but if you read your local prgan, you will have the result of the ekejipn. for breakfast—don't let it ppoilyour appetite," and #l' that bland, chijjlike smile so becoming to pressmen, he took his leave, The polling was over, and when the straightjaped Ballotbox retired to his wellearned repose he felt satisfied that he had this time " euchred" the indefatigable Inkbottle, The first thing he did on waking was to get the jnorning journal, and imagine if you can his astonishment and rage when he found announced that, despite Mr Ballotbox, and the precautions he had taken against them, they were onco more able to give their readers the anxiously • looked; for information respecting the the poll. Then followed, in their,respective positions, the names of the candidates who were returned. The indefatigable Inkbottle had been so successful in the task he had set himself that he could have placed before the public the exact number of votes polled'by each candidate had he so wished. He met Ballotbox next day, and accosted him with, "well, my close friend, you most obliging of civil ser- -, vants, have you eaten that shirt yet f W-. Ballotbox surlily intimated that he had , done so. Inkbottle suggested that he had a clean change he might do j/ it there and then; but we believe that up to the present time the crest-fallen returning officer has not redeemed his hasty promise. The oath is still registered, By what means Inkbottle obtained .'his information we are not prepared to state, but it is needless to say he has not informed Mr BallotT&oxj!-