THE WEATHER FIEND.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume 4, Issue 1245, 2 December 1882, Page 2 (Supplement)

THE WEATHER FIEND.

ASIBSBrOiRDBOPSSIOIIOPIN IVBBtUIINO • ; ' ' lOPIO.""; "Pretty warm," the man'in thethin olothes said to the man in the corner Seat as_ the SouWHiiro'ar'was coming downtheDivision street steps, , , , " What's pretty warm t growled the man in the corner.- '•::;: ;:... ■■.:■... .:•,.:.. "Why, the weather," ■ ; : " Whaiweather V- more gruffly than eY«, ' "Why,"theman with the thin clothes said, looking, as though he wished he hadn't begun it;' "this weather." : ' ; ' ■'" ' "Well,"' said the man- in the corner, " how's this weather any different from'any dther'f' :■•■'. r .' ■ ';':"'

' ! The maH'ufith the thin 1 cldthea looked ner« voiialy at the 1 diimb' mul6 and said; "It was* warmer;" "How. do you ; know it'is?".asked the. tenia the corner; ," ■•'■"'. : The other man began to'wish he was well out of it, and said he'supposed it wasj he hadn't h'earl how the- : ■'■' ■ 'ilsn'itheweatherthesameeverywhere? savagely demanded the man in the corner. '" Why; hi;" the than with the thin clothes replied, wishing td'goodness ho had a' news* paper to hide ■behind'; " no; its warmer in some places and in some places it's colder." " What makes it : . warmer in some places thb'it'B colder in others J" remorselessly pursued the man in the corner. "Whyj"the/ man with the .thin clothes said piteorialy,?' theisnn,'with the effects of the sua's heat." ;; ■" '' '., "Makes it.coldcrin'sOmeplaces than.its warmer in others ?" roared -the martin the corner, 1 indignantly. '■" Never heard 6f Buch athing," ■';■'■- '■'. : "■'" ""•/' ! ' : ; : " No;" theTnaninthe thin clothes Hastened to explain;; "'I didn't mean'that,'):The''sun rdakes'it warm." ! ' ' ) "Then what'makes 1 it colder?" pursued the remorseless maninthe'corner. •' ; ''The;man in thin'clothes wiped the beaded' perspiration frbin'hia pallid brbw,Rnd said slowly' he 'guessed I ',' it waS the ice;'' ■' :! ) " What ioef' demanded the inquisitor. ." Why," the vlctimsaid; withall symptomi of' approaohing dissolution apparent in r his tremulous voice; ; " the ice'that'was frozen—froieri.by the frost;"- '. ' '■-. '■'■'" "Did you. ever see any l ice that wtsnt; frozen?"'howled themanin'the'eorner, in a,

buret of derision; ; ' ''*''-. '.'; .'" ; . The'man in thin clothes huskily whispered that he wished he was dead, and'said: "No, that is, ho believed he didn't." : ■'" Then/ 1 .thundered the matt in the corner, "what are' you talking about f • The man in thin clothes then made an effort to brace up, and spicily replied that ho was trying "to talk about'the weather." "And what do you know about it?" tri» umphahtly roared the man in the corner. " What do you know about the weather!"_ : The man in the thin clothes lost his grip again, l and feebly said " he didn't knew very much about it, that was a fact." • And then he'triedto be cheerful and work in a little joke about nobody being able to know much'about the weather, but the man in the j corner sat down oh him with a tremendom outburst. ! "No; sir 11 should say you didn't. ' JSTou come into this car and force yourself on the attention of a stranger, and begin to talk to me about the weather, just as though you owned it, and I find you don't know a solitary thing about the matter _ yourself selected for your'topic of conversation; you don't know brie thing about meteorological Conditions, principles or phenomena; you can't tell me why it is warnvin August and cold in December) you don't know : icicles form faster in the sunlight' tkn they do in the shade; you don't know, why the earth grows colder as it comes near the 1 aim; you Lcan'ttell'why a man can bo silnstruck in the shacle';' you can't tell me-how a-cyclone is formed nor how the trade winds blow'; yo« couldn't find the calm centre'of a ■ storm if your life depended on;it-j you don't know 'wiiatya sirocco is; nor where the south-west monsoon blows j you don't know the aver* ; ag« rainfall in the United State for the past and current'year, you'don't understand the formation of fog, arid you can't explaia why the dew falls at night and dries up in theday; you don't know why a wind dries' th« ground mote quickly than a hot Bun; you don't know one Military' thing about the weather, and you are just like a thousand ' and one other people who always-begin' talking about the weather because they don't know anything else; when, by the cave of Bofeau, sir, they know less about the.weather than they do about anything else in the world!" ■ And the man in the corner glared up and down at tho timid passengers in the South Hill car, but no man 1 durst'ahswer him; And as for the man in the thin'clothes, lie didn't know for the life of him whether he had. a sunstroke or an ague chilli' He only-knew that it seemed about'twenty.seven miles to the Jefferson streot crossing,- Burlington Havikiyi.