HIS HONOR AND BIJOH.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume 4, Issue 1234, 20 November 1882, Page 2

HIS HONOR AND BIJOH.

He was' a man with an ulster on his back and a look of solemn indignation in his face, and hi? had hardly taken position before the desk when, he announced in r hollow voice • 1 Sir, I protest!' ; 'Yum,'replied his Honor as he finished the last half of an apple,' wiped the blade of his knife on' the blotting pad and bent forward to business.

'Sir, I solemnly protest! 1 coutinuod tho prisoner.,. 'This is tlv's.outrago of the nineteenth century.' ; J'"'-'""-!' V \ 'Shouldn't wonder—Bhouldu't wonder. Let's see the papers. Ah 1 Ydf are bharged with disturbing the peaoe. 'I deny it iu toe-toe, and demand my instant discharge I' ■ •Denyit, eh? Very well. I believe you call yourself Prof. Perkins/ !Prof, ■Porkios, the Great Amorioan Healer,' ! '" ■ Just so. T«u had a street stand on Jefferson avomie and talked up sale for what you call yop Japanese headache cure.' ' I did, eir, and I cured thirteen oates of headache in less than twenty minutes.' 'But there was one ease you did not cure. It was that of a man who bought some of the stuff of you a year ago, and got a core nose by snuffing it. Ho demanded his money baolc. •■••'.■

'Hewasi kicker, sir,' ' Instead of returning him his money you abused him.' . 'Yes, I called him a fraud,' , '.And then something of a riot took place. Your stand was upset, muoh headache cure wasted, and several parties were more or less battered. I shall hold you responsible.' " Why, your Honor, what did I have to do with it I' .'''•'

'You gn&rantee to refund the money where a cure is not effected.' ' Yes, but tae fellow was lying' 'How do you know?' . . ' DeoaußO my great American Headache Cure never fails,'

' Well, I have something a little better. I shall fine you 10 dollars,'

'That's no cure for a headache, your Honor.'

* I might double tlie doso.''

'No, you neodn't. I'll pay tho fino, bnt it's an outrage all the same. I suppose I can me for damage?' ... .'Oh yes-sue (or anything you want to. CaU the next.' ...■•'.