WHY SHE COULDN'T.

Wairarapa Daily Times, Volume 2, Issue 95, 27 February 1879, Page 2

WHY SHE COULDN'T.

Ho had returned with his wife from a summer vacation at the seaside, and he stood in front of the house giving a friend a graphic account of the season's pleasures. "Wont in bathing overy day," he exclaimed enthusiastically. "Ah!" responded the friend. "Wife go in too?" "Oh, yes: every day," said the returned vacationist. "Can she swimJ" queried the friend with interest, "No-o, she can't," was the reply. "She tried and tried to,learn, but somehow she did'nt get t]ie hang of it, She said she couldn't gat the right kick, and I let her think that was the reason; but the fact was and here he looked up at the house, and sunk his voice to a hoarse inspiration—- ' 'the fact was, she couldn't keep her mouth shut long enough to take four strikes, before she'd have some silly rciriarlf to make, when 'kerswf\3h'— shp'd swallow a whole waye, find go plump to the bottom," and the husband winked rapidly as the scene was recalled to mind, and went into the' house chuckling with pleasure. But he

hadn't noticed-ft woman's face' peering out of the curtains of a raised window. The acquaintance 'saw tho front; door open quickly, saw a hand reach out and grasp tlio seaside hoarder by the collar saw the heels of that individual crack his back as he shot through the door, which slammed behind his vanishing back, heard a wild and stifled noise of a human body being hauled over a hat rack and banged against a wall, and heard a muffled voice like that of an enraged woman say—"Take that back and I'll let you up, you wall-eyed yahoo!" And tho acquaintance, with a countenance of wonder and alarm, passed on, rubbing his head in a bewildered manner.