NOT ON SPEAKING TERMS.

Waimate Daily Advertiser, Volume IV, Issue 208, 27 May 1902, Page 3

NOT ON SPEAKING TERMS.

The colour sergeant of a certain Militia regiment one day was calling the roll of the company on commanding officer’s parade, when it was noticed that one Private Murphy did not answer to his name.

“Murphy !” shouted the “non-com” three times without receiving a reply. “Why do you not answer to your name, Murphy ?” sternly enquired the captain.

“Sluirc, sor, me and the sergeant’s not on speakin’ {erms,” was the unexpected reply.

An old barrister- was giving advice to his son, who was just entering his father’s profession. “My son,” said the counsellor, “ if you have a case where the law is clearly on your side, hut justice seems to he clearly

against you, urge upon the jury the vast importance of sustaining the law If, on the oilier hand )on are in doubt about Hie law, but your client’s case is founded on justice, insist on ike necessity of doing justice though the Leavens fall.” But, asked the son,“ how shall I manage a case where law and justice are dead against me ?” “In that case,” replied the old man, “ talk round it.”

After the ball.—“ No ; he’s not the man for me, Maude. I want a husband who is easily pleased.” “ Don’t worry, Laura dear that’s the sort you will get.”