HUMOUR

Wanganui Chronicle, Volume 83, Issue 48, 27 February 1939, Page 3

HUMOUR

11 ; s Archdeacon Wilberforce was noted* for his straight answers. One day he visited his friends, John Hare. Hare, who was never without a dog, put a question to his guest. ‘‘Do you really believe, Archdeacon, in a hereafter for our dogs?” “Indeed I do,” replied Wilberforce “But do you mean that when I die I shall really see my dear old dog again?” Hare persisted. “Undoubtedly you will,” was the reply, “if you are good enough! ”

Hint It was evening and the sun was going down behind the distant hills. The spectacle greatlv moved a passenger, who said to a porter of a way side station: “ Did you ever see anything liner than that scene of the sun tipping the hills with gold?” “Not lately,” said the porter, “but there was a time when 1 was often as lucky as them ’ills!’’

Sympathy He had been sent to comfort a fellow employee who was in hospital recovering from an accident. Univ the victim’s nose showed through the bandages. Throwing his hat on the bed ami helping himself to some fruit, he began: “My, but you didn’t half look funny when that load of bricks fell on you. Bill. We still laugh when we think of it."

Offer A dark went into hig employer’.! office ami asked for a rise in his salary, as he was going to get married. “I’m afraid I can’t manage it; times are too bad,” said the employer, “nut I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll shorten your hours for the first six months after you’re married so that you can spend your evening? at home. After that I’ll lengthen hem again so that you will have an r scuse to get away.”

Not His Job Two teams were contesting an important Cup-tie. Play was vigorous and excitement ran high. Among the home club’s extreme partisans was a St. John Ambulance man. He got into a heated argument with a supporter of the visiting team, and so far forgot himself as to shake his fist in the other ’s face. Immediately there came a voice from the crowd: “Oi, chum, you musn’t do that. You’re ’ere to pick ’em up, not knock ’em down!”