HUMOUR

Wanganui Chronicle, Volume 83, Issue 30, 6 February 1939, Page 3

HUMOUR

Mourning Alter IB “Trouble with Susan is she’s so senti-3 mental. She weeps bitterly over love stories, and falls madly in love with the hero. ’ * 44 Yes!” “Remember when they broadcast ‘Romeo and Juliet’?’’ “Uh-huh.” “Well. after Romeo committed suicide Susan wore black for two years. ”

4 • Hallo! . . yes . . it’s your husband, . . who’s speaking?’’

Donovan had done some work for the local squire, who was so pleased that he asked him if he would like a drop of whisky. 44 Yes, sorr,” said Donovan. •‘Will you have it hot or told?’’ asked the squire. “Cold, sir,’’ was the answer. “I’ll never have any more hot whisky as long as I live. ’ “That’s funny,’’ replied the squire, “what makes you say that?’’ “Well, you see, sorr, it’s like this,” answered Donovan. “The other night I had a drame, and in the dranie a man asked me to have a drop of whisky, and he asked whether I’d have it hot or rold. I said ‘hot,’ and, believe it or not, sorr, while the kettle was boiling I woke up.’

ITt nv c. take that iron tonic again!' ’

Two gossips were watching a neighbour entering her house after a shopping expedition. “Ah,” remarked one. “it’s only swank that she’s going about like that—with her arm in a sling and her eye baddaged up.” “Swank?” queried the other. “Yes,” was the emphatic pronouncement. “It s just to make people be-

with it’ Each time I turn the vombina lion lock. 1 get Da' entry! ”

“You say your husband paid £l,OOO for this little old book?’’ said the visitor. “He no doubt wanted to show that he has a great regard for literature; ” “No,” replied Mrs New rich, “he wanted to show how little he thinks of £l,ooo.’’

“ISs and tid . . . Thank you! . . . No, I shan’t have the goods . . It’s my arithmetic homework for to morrow, you see!” The American proudly exhibited a small scar. “See that! I got it when I fell from the window of a room on the forty-six tn floor of the skyscraper where I work.’ 4 ‘The forty-sixth floor? And you weren’t killed! ” “No, I was lucky—l fell inwards.”