Miscellaneous.

Wanganui Chronicle, Volume XIII, Issue 1021, 1 May 1869, Page 3

Miscellaneous.

Why does a duck put its head under water I —For divers reasons. Why does a donkey prefer thistles to grass ?—Because he’s an ass. Why does a sailor know there is a man in the moon I —Because he has been to see (sea). Old maids are described by an American paper as “ embers from which the sparks have fled.” An American editor, having heard that drowning men remember every event of their lives, advises his defaulting subscribers to bathe in deep water. According to a writer in Blackwood, every man who is not a monster, mathematician, or a mad philosopher, is the slave of some woman or other. A Minnesota paper speaks of a contemporary as “ the nondescript newspaper concern ” which is published by the “senile slinder of unsavoury English and crazy crotchets. ” The Boston Herald says that “ dry goods dealers” in New York who refuse to close their stores at seven p.m. suffer by having their plate-glass windows broken by members of the Early Closing Association. The Columbus (Ohio) Journal pays the following compliment to the new Indiana senator: —“ Garret Davis has a voice like a three weeks’ fall rain, but Pratt can wash him high and dry with one squirt.” The following advertisement appears in a New York paper: —“ If the party who took a fancy to my overcoat was influenced by the inclemency of the weather all right ; but if by commercial considerations, I am ready to negotiate for its return. —John Brougham.”

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