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Wairarapa Standard, Volume I, Issue 29, 22 July 1867, Page 3

Cold Fiek.— One very cold night a jolly old fellow, who had partaken rather too freely of Hip at the tavern, started for home in a dcg~ cart, and on the way was upset, and left by the side of the road. Some person passing the same way a short time after, discovcd the, old fellow holding his feet up to the moon, ejaculating to some invisible person, “ John pile on the wood—it’s a thunderin’ cold fire.” Fink Como. —A popular merchant in London, having received a superb assortment of hair-combs, was most anxious to attract the attention of his fur customers to their merits. “ Can’t I sell you a line comb, madam ?” said he, to a rural beauty, who stood at his counter. —“ No, sir, thank you, sir,” responded the fair one, hi indignant tones ; “ thank you, sir, I don’t need anything of that kind.”— I The agitated damsel ,had evidently misconstrued the word “ fine.” Oni-t Once.— Bunkum, in Devonshire, is undoubtedly the heahhicst spot on earth, and it was on that account that some Cockney gentlemen were surprised one day to see a Bunkumite at work upon an ominous-looking “ hole in the ground.” Of course they iurjnired what he was about. grave, sir.”—“ Digging a 'grave ! , Why, I thought people didn’t die often here —do they"?”—“Oh, no, sir; they never die hut ouee ! H They never asked the question, “ but once.”