THE MAN WHO KEEPS TWO OR THREE DOGS.

Tuapeka Times, Volume VII, Issue 338, 14 March 1874, Page 3

THE MAN WHO KEEPS TWO OR THREE DOGS.

It is pleasant to pay a visit to the house of a man who keeps two or three dogs. The dogs always fly at you in the most ferocious manner as soon as you enter the yard, and just as you have made up your mind that you are going to be torn from limb to limb the owner appears, and, as you wipe the perspiration from your brow, he laughs, and says those dogs are '• perfectly harmless, except when any one resists them." Then you sit down in the porch, and all three of the dogs sniff at your legs until you are afraid to move, If you can summons up courage enough to pat one on the head, the other two instantly put their forelegs on your lap, and cover your trousers with dirt, while each struggle to crowd the other off. After a bit the third dog tries to jump on your knee, and they threaten to have a fight about it, while you are afraid to encourage one for fear of making the other two macf. When they have pawed about your pantaloons and covered them with mud, the owner interferes and sends them all away. After tea your host excuses himself for half-an-hour, and you go out to sit in the porch alone Presently the three dogs come bounding up, and they all begin to smell you as earnestly as if they had never performed the operation before. Then they lie down ; but, as soon as you move your chair or your feet, they spring suddenly up and appear to be deeply interested in considering you. You think you will take a walk in the garden, and the whole three follow close at your heels, while you are expecting every moment to have the calf of your leg bitten out. It is surprising how gingerly a man walks with three strange dogs close behind him. Directly the dogs engage in a tight over a bone, you embrace the opportunity to hurry back to the house. Just as you break into a trot, you are surprised to find that the brutes have made up their quarrel and are leaping up at you and barking, half in fun and half in earnest. You slow up, and get back to the porch. When you put your hand on the front door knob, all three dogs stand around and utter ominous growls. Then they suddenly seem to be impressed with the idea that something is wrong, and they all begin to bark savagely, and to make dashes at you. The door is locked, and in alarm you climb up on the porch seat. This convinces the dogs that something absolutely must be wrong, and they begin in downright earnest to try to grab you by the leg. Just as the big yellow dog succeeds in getting hold of your boot, your host comes up, calls off the dogs, and is very much amused to find you so frightened about " two or three unoffending animals that would't hurt a child." Then you want to go home, and when you once get outside the gate you register a solemn vow never again to visit any man who has so poor an idea of the demands of hospitality as to keep a lot of beastly cure about the house to annoy and persecute his friends. — " Max Adler."

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