THE COUNTRY

Observer, Volume 7, Issue 228, 24 January 1885, Page 10

THE COUNTRY

Contributions are invited from coitnv, y d'isricts, hut no notice will be taken of communications which contain merely vague, or spiteful remark*, or arc not attested by a genuine signature and address. Correspon. dents should write only on one side of tlw paper. HUNTLY. Who is the benedict that escorts Tilly to church and won't give poor Fred a show ? CAMBRIDGE WEST. Yes, it is quite true Miss F. has given the jammy M., late of Pukohohe, the cold shoulder. What is it all about, I wonder ? KAMO. G. has, "after months of hard struggle, got his conge. He is evidently first favourite with the White Horse. Who were those fancy kid gloves for, G-eordie ? PAKURANGA. Did W. find out who was the lady in blue last Sunday ? What were our local storekeeper and those two larrikins doing at S.s gate on Sunday evening ? Were they wanting an invitation to tea ? TURAKINA. The Night Owl has got the advantage of Fred Who was the lady from the valley that thought she could drive horses better than Bob ? Is Freddy paid for throwing bags at drunken men while sleeping the effects of their debauchery off? HAUIArtT. The Hautapu ladies wore the best dresses at the Tamahere concert. Cannot Frank find better employment than ■watching the girls at the church ? Is it true that Miss R. shed tears when that young man from Auckland left the new house ? MORRTNSYILLE. Dismal Jimmy has returned from the City, but who cut his hair ? Who spilt the milk and gravey at dinner the other day at the Phcenix ? [ The G-ipsy Queen and Teddy are to be counted as members o? the T. family when they go in double harness. HIKUBANGI. Does the Kamo king como to see hid future son-in-law ? The grocer is going to put up for Parliamentary honours soon. Which of the W.s made the biggest rise on Norman's waggons. They took a 711 can advantage of the poor fellow. ONEIIUXGA. ! Has Agnes turned religious because she thinks the Campbell will come again. Do the twins attract curly-headed Willie of Epsom to the Mount Eden store ? Pumpkin Flat Bob looks quite disconsolate since his darling Polly jilted him for Ginger for Pluck. TOTARA WORTH. The blacksmith has appeared in a new role — welding soft hearts instead of iron. If Jeff does not hurry up, he will soon have to vacate. His fair one is scattering her favours far and wide. SS^ Was the entertainment given by the young widow a success? and is it proper to entertain one's bachelor friends until two o'clock in the morning ? HELENS VILLE. Bob G. is cutting out the running for the milkman. The baby has returned. Wei'e times hard in Sydney ? X., next time you take in the wash-house gum sacking, take care that the Doughy is not listening. The cricket match on Saturday was a boil over for the married men. The ladies are looking forward to the bachelors ball. KAEO. The new sect ought to take— the Gorilla plays for them. The Or:\ngers begrudge the bit and the ?up to the ladies. Mrs G.s sunday (concerts) service is doing good. l!^o vermin are admitted. The beet Holy Joe ever in Kaeo had to travel | because he couldn't preach. Those young ladies at the store shouldn't count their chicks before they're hatched. Remember the pig. Xaeo Visitor : 'What a fine lot o' hares yez got in this place.' Old Resident (quite astonished) : ' Them's not Mares, they're a lot of Kilkenny, cats.' WAIPU. The belle of the ball, Miss K. McKay, wns admired by Charley. Dear Maggie was in great. flpitvi».ri m iuv dances at the last ball, and even vim. h.'st ha : r,, hop with her. There was a general execution of doge of all nationalities at the corner last week. The Peer ik>w only sports the Clown. M. must undergo a jjrocess of piHfi niu>v. outjjide the walls of the City befor. .• - v-iIL be admitted into the new society. That Mangawai man in tights m.^, L.,ow> that he will not be admitted to the Caledon' >> ivi.-t, if not more respectably dressed.

WHANGAROA. What was Katie doing with the red snipe up fihe hill ? The Professor wishes to know i£ the widow will take Brighton by storm. The place is very quiet since the Working Bullocks went to the bush. The mark loft by the Giant in Wo. 8 hole will disappear in a, few days. Our noble Boniface was caught in his own toils. He drank his own mixture, and then blamed the horse for going to sleep and throwing him. COROMANDEL. In the future Mrs B. had better be careful how slie speaks of our village beauty. We hear our fair ladies of the Star and Santio are about to Hit. No moi-e attraction for our visitors. The blue Tarn o' Shanter is not at all admired. Let it be considered anything will not do for Coromandel. Pills looked verj dejected at not being able to attend the riding pary. No doubt the ride home with Miss K. after her mishap compensated for the disappointment. TE ABOHA. The running is very strong between Tom and j the baker for Miss M. The waggoner looks downhearted since C. has left. Never mind, J., take the sister. S. had better come in from Waiorongomai, as M. says she will hare the first one that asks her. Ask Miss B. what the minister said while playing kiss-in-ring on New Tear's Day. Poor Georgy is awsiy, but Miss S. thinks no one will Jet him know of. the little affair in the street. TAUPO. The Galhout would not trust himself and fortune by water, but rode round. His Rosiuante was much admired for his fine points. It is whispered that there is, or was an officer, not n hundred miles from Taupo, who allowed one of his men to die in an old raupo whare infested by rats. Why are the sick of the A.O. thrust into the back rooms of a building where public dances are held ? Co^ld not the Seraskier's tunery be converted into a hospital? Frightful shipwreck of the Dauntless. The cute cove came to the rescue and pulled the fore and aft oar. Great consternation among the officers and men. The Great Mogul's mug on relanding looked very long. The last A.C. ceneert was, or was not a howling success. Taupo's Paganini struck up " The Camphells aro coming," when a clansman and Terpsichcomus varmosed the ranch by order of Brigham Young. TAURANGA. Big Jim did well at the M.I. Association the other night. Did Duck run away the other night because Charlie was too much for him ? DOGGEREL. The first of all our peeper spies, Is Charlie F., you know, That he is courting Dell, And Dick has got to go. And F., the lightning-jerker, From Emily has to hide, For he is making violent love To M. of Ivforningside. Oh, Fossy M., you foolish youth, I'm sure I'd not be told That I was hanging up my hat To one some years too old. A lady of Tauranga was Forlorn in despair, For Bertie left her, went away, To get a change of air. But now he lias returned again, And filled her heart with joy ; She goes out walking of a night With 8., the darling boy. Eliza A. is not in love, For Teddy couldn't get her ; However, Teddy seems to think That Margaret suits him belter,