Brief Mention

Observer, Volume 3, Issue 78, 11 March 1882, Page 412

Brief Mention

Jem Mace arrived in Auckland by the Eotorua. Who escorted Jeroboam to the Oj.'uru dance ? Was it a G.T. ? „,,_• What will be the good of Tawluao's native meeting ? In other words " Kai bone, oh ?" (cvi hono ?) It is rumoured that a Cabinet Council will be called to consider Garrard's manifesto to the Premier. The Wesleyan bazaar, opened in Q.ueen-street yesterday, promises to be a great success. Mr Gamble, our much-respected mail agent, gives a dinner party on Tuesday next. The Parnell folks will not agree about that water supply. " Progressial locomoteo ataxy is the new gorgeous name for a species of insanity. The " champion " mean man has turned up in Eemuera this time. More next week. Dear Mr Tebbs Must give way to the plebs. Even if it is by dribs and drebs. Messrs J. and J. Dickey presented a gold albert and chain to Mr Charles A. Willdigg on the occasion of his leaving for Sydney. Captain Toser, of the s.s. Eotorua, was presented with a purse of sovereigns by the passengers on the last trip from Melbourne. Messrs. Meal and Grubb were among the chief prize-takers at the Port Albert Show. This was as itshould be. n There is joy in the kitchens of Waikato, and discontent sits "like a dark cloud on the faces of the local swains. One hundred A.C.'s have gone up. " Somebody's coming to-morrow," as the man sang when his next door neighbour, with, two black eyes, went to get out a summon* for assault and battery. The confidential and friendly tone in which '•the devil" addressed the editor of the Slav in Monday's issue shews the intimate relations between them. Tauranga has been afflicted with an epidemic worse than scarlet fever. A mania for issuing " Victorias by the Grace of God" has broken out. The Taranahi News gives a long description of a "big blast" that split a rock. Some of the St. Thomas' people would do well down there. A • disgusted St. Thomasite says the St. Matthew's people are not deficient in organisation, whatever they may lack in other respects. One of the advantages of lunching at some of the Auckland restaurants is that you get a good appetite by the time you are served. We learn by telegram that the plant of the Waikato Mail was not seized but was handed over by mutual consent to the agent of Mr Ivess. One of our staff is scraping away on the fiddle for eighteen hours a day, He says he'll get the advertising patronage of Judge Fenton or the cat-gut market '11 go up. Jem Mace looks in splendid form. He will give a series of his unrivalled statuesque exhibitions, which are so highly spoken of by the English, American, and Australian Press, in about a fortnight. The Star must have had at least two reporters at the band contest. One tells us that it was " a great success," and, the other that " it cannot be considered a success." Why didn't they toss up for it ? Long John Lamb, or John Lamb Long, Why did you pitch it quite so strong ? That case against McCrae was sham ; He only longed to save his lamh. A churchwarden, not one hundred miles from the North ' Shore, was enjoying himself at the Victoria Gardens on Saturday with a nursegirl, who seemed fond of him. Mr Lodder keeps the Kaipara Steam Shipping Company up to its work. The other day the trip from Dargaville to Auckland, per s.s. Durham and rail, only occupied 10 hours. Last Monday morning a swimming match, distance about a quarter mile, took place at the Public Baths between Messrs. W. H. Pulford and J. C. Leatherby— the former winning by some twenty yards. The Herald, in its " Literary Notes," says, " Mr Leslie Stephen was undertaken Swift in the English Men of Letters." Poor fellow ! Did some irate reader go for him with a club, and who was the undertaker i* The Colonial Treasurer lias need of a big surplus. A claim against the Government of a quarter-, of-a-million has been made by the Brogdens, in fact, quite a Brogdengian claim. On Tuesday next, the 14th inst., the Auckland

Choral Society will give a second performance, consisting of Haydn's •' lmperial Mass" and Mendelssohn's "Athalie." It is rumoured that the St. Helier's Bay Company are negotiating for the purchase of another steamer for the North Shore Ferry trade. The Tonarariro did a little better lust w«ek, but, still, we hardly

think it pays. .Much amusement is caused in Dunedin just now by the walls being placarded with large posters advertising cheap suits, the centre space being occupied by the full length portrait of a doughty lady-killer bank manager, irreproachably attired. In some American States it is the custom to keep in solitary confinement for three months or more, prior to their execution, criminals who are under sentence of death. This may account for the delay in hanging up Mr Guiteau. A witty individual has suggested that the Archlull Brick and Tile Company and the Working Men's Club of that district should amalgamate, so that when the next row comes on "missies" may be had at cost price. The Herald reporter, "who cackled over that story about the Wellington anenometer the other day, found an addled egg. Mr Swanson first related it in the House about six or seven years ago, and it duly appeared in Hansard. The "Whau Presbyterians seem to like St. James' Choir, when they send drags to town for the conveyance of the members. The Wednesday night concert was a fair success, one or two pretty songs being Tendered by " our girls from town." Some of the children attending the public

school in Nelson-street are causing much annoyance by throwing stones. One of the_ children of a family named Tyler has been seriously injured by a stone. The superintendent should look to this. Mr Cornish told his hearers at the morning open air meeting outside St. Thomas' on Sunday last that " they might all, in a certain sense, be said to carry the bag." Does he mean because they had got the sack from the church building P

Wednesday's Star says that Mr Bryce, Defence Minister " has' gone to Waiwera to recruit!" It does not appear whether he means to recruit an army for some fresh Maori raid, or whether it is only his health that is to be recruited after his exhausting labours. Bliffkins -wonders what is meant by the papers announcing day after day " The Otago Runs." He wants us to answer these questions— why the Otago runs ? Is *" it Grey, or Hall or Eolleston that's chasing it ? And what is the Otago any way ? Anagram, apropos of the recent band contest at the North Shore .—Victoria Gardens : Victors— A great din.— [Our correspondent will observcthat there's a"t" too many in his answer; perhaps he means to imply that the whole affair was not just the T.] Carl Shafer, who travelled on the photograph and autograph dodge, has passed in his checks. Carl married a half-casto at Ohinemurij but when she discovered that he was only a poor traveller she went away with some other fellow. More " tangle talk" in the Herald. Describing a family "row" in England, in which five brothers were concerned, it says :— " Conversation turned upon the will of their late father and dispositions of the property, and that irritating ' tropic/ combined with the arink which they had imbibed, "caused the discussion to become an excited one." Being thus in the Tropics it is not to be wondered at that " hot words ware naed," etc. Surely the hot weather has been affecting the Herali's staff. Bather " muggy," eh f

" A woman generally takes a new departure at about fifty," says a contemporary in the ladies' column. You bet she does. She generally departs for another and a better world. If she is our mother-in-law she ought, if she retains any sense of decency. A correspondent suggests the following to the Sliaker sect as a succinct form of cireed : — " Multiplication's my vexation ; Addition's just as bad ; The rule of three— What ? Triplets! Gee!

That fellow must be mad !" " There's no room," said a man gruffly at the band contest, to a tired lady who tried to find a seat. But she squeezed in, and, having adjusted her skirts, remarked, with a sweet smile to a lady on the other side : '• Eeally, I wasn'taware that Stark and Quick had got those bears here." Fair tresses man's imperial race ensnare. And beauty draws us with a single hair. The first line reads all right. Those chignons do the business. But what about the single hair? Perhaps the old poet's wife used to lug him in by the whiskers whenever he flopped down on the doorstep. Two meu fainted in the Public Baths last Sunday morning. There were nearly 200 people in the enclosure at the time. That kind of thing should surely be seen to. The fact is, that the baths are totally inadequate to accommodate the un washed, and are only evidence of another waste of public money. Leaders of fashion in Europe are setting their faces against the proposed introduction of crinoline, and it is also remarked that the Chancery Lane "ladies" of Auckland have assumed hoops of most portentous proportions. Two infalliable signs that, for the present, Society's motto is—" Hoop-de-dooden— Don't !" Mr Denton thinks the differences in the colour of races is due to the colour of the earth. "He saw the differences of colour in the earth from which man had come. Along the ages men had brought with them the differences of colour of the material from which they had started." We understand all about that parsleybed at last.

The people who inhabit the jumble of kerosene tins and wooden match boxes called Wellington are very hard to please. ■ When the Governor spends all his time in Wellington the newspapers abuse him for not making himself acquainted with the Colony, and when he goes on a visit to Christchurch they howl against his absenting himself from the seat of Government. There is nothing to equal the cheek of a lifeinsurance agent. The other dav, when the wife of Mr A; P. Eatclitfe, Custom House Officer at Whangarei, presented him with twins, a fellow named Metcalf wanted him to insure the lives of the interesting pair. Why is there no law for the extermination of life insurance agents, like rabbits? Perhaps Mr Moss will look to this next session.

Captain Ashby was hurrying along Queenstreet, when he encountered an old friend. " I came on a visit for a few days— glorious weather— splendid business— make hay while sun shines," said the captain, with his usual volubility. " Well," coolly replied the gentleman thus addressed, "I've got the Maori King on hand for the present ; but when I've done with him, no doubt I shall be able to take you up."

The Herald asks Bryce if " he can recall any moment when the intrusion of a grim overshadowing ugliness (this is tall writing) would have disturbed the serenity of a pleasurable occasion." We are officially authorised to state that the very last occasion was when the lion, member saw his own reflection in his lookingglass, when he was in the pleasing occupation of tittyvating his hair for a Government House ba'l.^ The surveyors' profession must be going to the dogs, when ghosts begin to go cavom-ting around with the theodolite and chain. The Herald informs its readers that " Birkenhead was originally laid out by an ex-Superintendont and a deceased auctioneer." No wonder the enterprise failed. The "deceased auctioneer,' after " pegging out" himself," and getting " laid out," started business in the same lino in the other world.

Mr Thompson went to the Thames on Wednesday, to make arrangements for a concert on Monday evening 1 , at which a gold-mounted baton will be presented to the bandmaster of the successful band at the late contest, and twenty -one gold medals to the members. The second prize, won by the city band, consisted of twenty silver medals, which will be presented at the Choral Hall on Thursday evening next. It was singular that during the sojourn of the Hon. the Premier in Auckland, so little was heard of the Auckland compact, by which the provincial district was to be so largely benefited. In the now Parliament, two of the memorable four will not adorn the councils of the Colony; and of the other two it may be remarked that invariably they regret being (so to speak) "had" by that artful dodger, Hall. We refrain from mentioning names. He heard the preacher's voice within, The solemn prayer fell on his ear ; Then peered around that larrikin Lest some stray peeler might be near. " Let your light shine before all men," The preacher said, in solemn bass. He said no more, alas ! just then That larrikin put out the gas. Overheard in D.'s restaurant : — Aristocratic Swell: "Wiiihvh, bring me a serviette." Waiter: " 'Ees, sir : minute, sir." A.S. (after waiting five minutes) : " Wai tab. ; will you bring me a serviette ?" Waiter: "'Eos, sir; coming, sir." (Another five minutes, and no serviette.) A.S.: " Wai tab, d— n you, will you bring me what I ordered?" Waiter: "It's being made, sir." Query: Of what and how are D.'s napkins made ? Are they a coloni:il omelette, or what ? Who were the two youths of very diminutive stature— one in a most conspicuous long-tailed coat— who partnered each other in the dancing (?) at the Victoria Gardens on Saturday night ? They ought to have thrown away their cigars before assuming the light fantastic. The two "sparks" wore quite prominent enough without their causing sparks to fly from their mouths as they whirled and wheeled. The cigars, however, rather helped the " illumination."

A temperance lecturer in a seaport town in Scotland was illustrating his discourse upon the evils of drink by x>lacing a piece of meat in a flask containing whiskey and applying the flame of a candle. He was arguing that the action of the heated spirit upon the meat was analogous to the effects of drain drinking on the digestive organs, when an old pilot, who had been watching the experiment with great interest, cried out, " Hoot, mon ! wha pits a lighted can'le Mil's waine." Mr Laishley's fearless conduct in the alleged fraudulent bankruptcy of John Taw brings to mind the well-known lines : — " An Eton stripling, training for the law, A dunce at syntax, but a dab at Taw." Though no one accuses Mr Laishley of being a •' stripling," and while there may be nothing wrong with his syntax, everybody will agree that he has shown himself a "dab at Taw." Our two daily contemporaries are vicing with each other in the production of musical dissertations. The §tai- has been publishing a series of papers on •' Music in the Colonies," written by the French Professor, F. 0. Cailliau ; and the Herald, not to be behindhand, gives " Hints on the practice of vocal music," translated from the German. Music is surely in a state of decadeuce, when we have to depend on " Mounseer " and "Mynheer" for lessons. We shall next have Signor Hurdigurdi writing articles on " The Ramifications of the Barrel Organ."

If the Victoria Gardens are not kept clear of tlie kind of people who attended that " hop " on Saturday night they will certainly develop into another Creuiorne. Such scenes are, to .say the least of it, disreputable. Fancy hearing the following from a young gent, engaged in a quadrille :—" Now you (a word of Italian origin,), get on with that (sanguinary) chain," and this addressed to two young girls (who, by-tlie-bye, ought to have been at home). Another fellow got a little jolly, and wanted to fight several men in the place. The language used was positively disgusting. We saw a "bobby" outside, but not one where the rows occurred.

The Herald on Saturday last undertook to enlighten its readers on the subject of the liability Of the State to make good to depositors in the Post-office Savings Bank any losses sustained through fraud on the part of third parties. Lord Coleridge's opinion is said to be—" That if a bank clerk paid n forged cheque the bankers would be liable, and these were deposits in Post-office savings studied the statutes as to these Postoffice savings banks to be able to answer the questions decidedly, but he was sure that the banks." Of course, after this lucid explanation, no doubt need exist as to the law on the subject. Surely tile comps. of the EwaU have been indulging in " tangle-type " lately 1

Scene : Theatre Hoyal — Old gentleman (near sighted, who has just sat 'down) : " Well, niy dear, as I was saying before I went out, wlien I went into your bedroom — ." She : " Sir !" "When I went in I stumbled over the — ." She : " Sir, how dare you insult a lady!" .(Old gentleman adjusts his spectacles, gazes in speechless amazement on the lady, who is becoming hysterical, and finds that after returning 1 from the hotel ho has sat down in the wrong seat, and mistaken the wrong lady for his wife.) Our poet has become prophetic for the nonce over the representation of "The Colonel," and this is what he says of it : — There once was a pjay called " The Colonel," Which appeared with a motion diolouel On the "Eoyal" stage, And proved such a rage That the Aucklanders thought it supolonel, And puffs were in every jokxnel, While the larrikins quoted " The Colonel !" Our Christchurch correspondent telegraphs the following- latest particulars respecting the Normal School scandal :— " There is a scandal in connection with the Normal School. Some boys are chargfid by the parents of some of the girl scholars with gi-oss immorality. Both sexes mix together at dinner- time, no teacher overlooking them. The morning and evening papers are keeping quiet. There will be an investigation by the Board of Education with closed doors. It is believed the charges are denied." Some strangers were anxious to know who was the patriarchial-looking- old gent, who solemnly trotted through the Victoria Gardens on Saturday night with a galaxy of ladies in his train. The ladies, eight in number, were all young, and some of them good-lcoking ; and more than one young fellow glanced enviously at the grand Turk (as they conceived him to be) giving his wiyes an airing. The envy was perhaps uncalled for, as the young ladies mie-ht be the daughters of their patriarchial guardian, in which case the feeling ought to have been commiseration for the old chap when the dressmaker's and milliner's bills come in. We cannot, however, definitely settle the question, as we are told the ladies were nearly all of one age. The " grand illumination and promenade concert and ball" at the North Shore on Saturday was as complete a. fiasco as could have been contrived. Prom the sublime to the ridiculous is but a step, and it proved a very Quick-step on this occasion. Fancy about a dozen couples stumbling through a quadrille, over stones, sods, and mud, to the light of two penny candles, held gravely by an old fellow in a straw hat ! Such was the scene actually to be witnessed. The papers the other day announced that the Jardins Mabille at Paris (the leading dancing garden, to which the charge for admission was five francs) has just been closed by order of the Government. If Parisians could only come to the North Shore, they will be consoled for the loss of the Jardin Mabille ! Looking at it in a business point of view, we think Mr "Garlick is to be congratulated upon not having been elected on the teetotal ticket as a Licensing Commissioner for any district. We learn that at a recent meeting of the Licensed Victv\allers' Association notes were compared and evidence taken as to the furnishing of hotels in the city and suburbs, when it was found that out of the thirteen hotels then represented at the meeting, Messrs G. and C. had furnished eleven of them ! After this, Mr Garlick certainly ought to entertain a more kindly feeling towards our local bonifaces. There can be no denying the fact that our colonial youths are precocious— we had almost said to a lamentable extent. The other day two youths attending one of our lending scholastic institutions managed to get hold of a pound note by some means or other, and, during the course of a night and morning, managed to melt it down in drink and lollies, etc. When one of them got to school the master did not, or would not see the real cause of bis pupil's indisposition; and instead of giving him a sound thrashing, packed him off home again under the plea that he was suffering from a severe attack of sickness. One of the most astonishing pieces of " cheek " came to our knowledge the other day. A certain young beau, who had, in turn, courted many of Auckland's fair lassies, went down South, and there got married very suddenly and under threats, it is said. Owing to youthful indiscretions he speedily ran out of funds, and then had the consummate impudence to write to the lady that he had last " jilted " in Auckland, asking her (out of her savings) to lend him ten pounds to tide him over his momentnry trouble— with, of course, profuse promises of speedy repayment. Fortunately the girl had sufficient nous a\id pride to treat the missive as it deserved. THE FEMALE BUEGLAES. Said Freestone to Burchell, " Instead of to church I'll Go down to the town for a spree, Let's indulge in a " burst" Off W. J. Hurst, And his grain and his bonedust let's see !" Said Burchell to Freestone " I'm very well pleased on Your plucky suggestion to act, We'll have such nice capers, And shine in the papers As heroines. Ain't that a fact ?" These feminine Plummers Proved regular "rummers" They rummaged at front and at back, But Constable Eyan Came sniffing and pryin' And lugged them to " chokey" alack ! Their "mars" came so slobbery, Wept o'er the robbery Said 'twas a freak — nothing more ! Saverna smiled sweetly The E.M. completely Broke down and said, " Go, sin no more !" The Black Knight. The genial host of the [National Hotel at Cambridge was lately subjected to considerable loss and annoyance by the stupid blundering of some excessive!* officious person. When the Ministerial party arrived at Hamilton they sent a letter by Mr Carter, proprietor of the E. M. coaches to Mr Baynes, the eenial and popular proprietor of the National, to engage three rooms and sitting-room for their accommodation, which he did, having gone to considerable expense with the idea of making them as comfortable as he could. On the morning of their arrival in Cambridge, you may imagine the surprise of Host Eaynes on receiving the following telegram:— " Countermand any arrangement made at Eayues'. Eooms had been taken for us at Kirkwood's." Have you got any spifce at Eaynes, R.H.D. ? The chief of the Ngatitiwhakatipu, Who boasted of blood of the bluest of blue His countenance covered all o'er with tatoo And his hair just as grey as Shylock the Jew, He went into Shortt's and he sat in a chair, And he said with a calm and a dignified air, " Tenakoe ! kapai, makee young by-an'-bye All the same as the pakeha— homai the dye." And when Ngatitiwhakatipu, Eeturned to his village at Whangaruru, In a new suit of togs and long stove pipe hat, Instead of the orthodox blanket or mat He married a score of the youngest wahiues All handsome, and none of them out of their teens And the tolnmgas say that they never yet knew Such a miracle happen at Whangaruru. Our readers may remember that a few months aeo the Observer published particulars regarding the sad fix of a young married man named Leadbetter who had come to this Colony alone to push his fortune, and shortly after arrival was attacked by a dangerous eye disease which necessitated his going hack to England for treatment. Those who generously subscribed towards paying his passage Home will be pleased to learn that he has arrived safely, and towards the end of December was to undergo an operation at Guy's Hosnital London. His general health was much improved by the voyage, but he says :-" The food was terrible Eighty per cent, of the third-class and steerage lmssengers could not eat it. The chief, often the only nieal of the day, was tea, and that was only bread and butter and in my condition I had to buy other things to keep life in. My cash dwindled down by paying stewards for this and for that, and tie specimen of a steward on the Eakaia is quite on elevated type of humanity as ! compared with, steward of the Orient s.s. Potosi. They would have robbed you of your shoes, figuratively ! speaking, and would have come afterwards looking for the laces !" Mr Leadbetter expresses his warmest thanks to the Auckland friends by whose kind aid lie ! was enabled to get jback to his young wife and friends.

The quantity of rubbish which the Wellington correspondent of the New Zealand Herald (Bouse Martin) sends to that journal should be " cut down " very considerably. Onr surprise at reading Ms telegrams is « always expressed when we notice that he has not "gone" for the Governor this time. It is somewhat singular that, notwithstanding all Eons' indications of the elasticity of the colonial revenue, the last quarter's accounts are not published yet. If this correspondent goes on announcing Ministerial items of intelligence as he lias been doing lately, lie will have to be sent to Mount View. Fancy Mr Hall authorising him to wire through the Colony that he sent a message to Christchurch for the Governor's signature for transmission to Her Majesty the Queen, when His Excellency had already done so. David said all men are liars ; but we are beginning to think some newspaper men cannot be be matched in drawing the long bow. THE ARMOURY ON THE GREEN. There is a Minister named Bryce, And, with' his instinct keen, He asks a marvellous fancy price For the Armoury on the Green. Shall I have nothing but what is fair — Have nought but the quid 2>ro quo '! Though the building is ugly, and cold, and bare, . . In sooth it shall not be so. And the Councillors saw, with grief and pain, That Armoury stand unmoved ; They were not to be done, though it stood lite a stain In the Ptirk of the city they loved ! Dr Wilkins, of Christchurch, the famous oculist, is now experimenting in a new and wonderful branch of ' surgery. He has succeeded in grafting new noses on to the countenances of men whose nasal organs had been bitten off in a scriinruidge, and as he can now transfer the eyes of pigs and rabbits to other animals, he does not despair of soon being able to stick a new eye into any man whose visual organ has been gouged out in a row. There was a young fellow named Bill, Who got very much mauled in a mill, He got such a clout That one eye was gouged out "Which made that young fellow feel ill. Says Wilkius, " I'll soon fetch you round I'll fix you all right I'll be bound," So he got a new eye From a pig in a sty And Billy went grunting around. Scene : Native Land Court, Judge Fenton giving judgment in an important case— The Judge : " This is a claim by the Ngabipuinkin tribe to a block of „ land, situate in — " [Noise without : " Tra-la-la-la-li-ity."l Judge: " How beautiful ! Quite utterly utter.; Mr Crier, go out and request him, with my compliments, to proceed with the next verse." Gentlemen, as I was about to say, the Ngatipumkins prefer the claim to— (" Ri-ti-ti-turu-ti-tiddy,") slightly flat in that upper F, I think, but still very fine modulation. Hojsr very beautiful is that ballad of Don Passchquall, " Scream on," especially the exquisite chorus' of babies ! But, as I was remarking, the tribe of Meycbcer— l beg you 1 pardon — I mean Ngatipumkin lay claim to the Hugenbts —ahem— the block of laud at— (" Tra-la-la-li-i-ity "— ) Splendid! magnificent! Gentlemen, the Court stands adjourned till 10 o'clock to-morrow morning. 1 really muse go and get my fiddle and accompany that gentleman outside, whoever he is, in that beautiful ballad. (The Judge rushes outside, embraces the melodious stranger, and appoints him on the spot a Judge of the Native Land Court. The following amusing letter was picked up at Glenburn, Ponsonby. We give it insertion believing it will interest and amuse some of our readers, particularly oiir horticultural friends :— " Acacia Shade, Sour Grass Hill,— My Rose-Mary— as you are the Pink of perfection and the Blossom of May, I wish to tell Yew that my Heart's ease has been torn up by the Roots, and the Peas of my Holm entirely destroyed since I began to Pine after Yew. Yew will perceive that lam a gardener. My name is William Bad. At first I was poor, but by Shooting in thu Spring and driving a Car-nation fast, I obtained a celery, and by a little Cabbaging, &c,, I Rose to be master (though something like a creeper) of the whole garden. I have now the full command of the Stocks and the Mint; I can raise Ane-Mone from a Penney Royal to a Plum and what my expenditure Leaves I put in a Box for Yew. If I may, as a cock's comb, speak of myself, I should say that I was in the Flower of manhood, that I was neither a Standard nor a Dwarf, a Mushroom nor a Maypole ; my nose is of the Turnip-Reddish kind and my locks hang in clusters about my Ears. I am often in the company of Rakes, and rather fond of Vino and Shrub, which my Elders reprove me for ; so I had better Berry all this, and as I am a Branch of a good stock, with a portly Bearing, I well know when and where to make my Bough, So Lettxice act for ourselves and fix an' early day for engrafting 'your fate with mine, which might be made a Pop-lar measure ; but I think it had better be Privet, for Jonquil, the lawyer, says that your old Crab of a father, who did never a Li-Lack when he wanted to part us, means to take the Elm in his own hands in this matter but if he does, and Bnllace me at all, I will not be slow in settling his Ash, and I will be such a Thorn in his side that" the day he does it shall be one of the worst Days he ever saw. But I must sow no seeds of discord ; for I am certain that we should make a very nice Pear, and never repent even when we became sage by Thyme. You would be the Balm of my Life and I should be the Balsam of yours; so that the people who call us Green now would call us Evergreen h jreaftcr. And now Sweet Peas be with you ; and if he who tries it Tares me from Yew, I shall become a Melon-Cauliflower, and wither away. My tongne will always be a Scarlet-runner in your praise, for I have planted my hops in Yew, and now I only live for the Thyme when I may hear from your own Tv-lips that I am your Sweet William, and not your Weeping Will-O'— 14th February, 1882. To Miss S., who, in prospect I hold To make my new garden like Eden of old.

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