OLLA PODRIDA.

Thames Star, Volume XVII, Issue 5252, 17 November 1885, Page 2

OLLA PODRIDA.

t ,,,,.,Y0».,. baie^a m ih»»p-Wt-«fo«s^«^t know how to manage it. Such is the characteristic, remark of ft man who oertairily has always managed his own show well, and who deliffrs himself thnily"on the management o€< thinga in this, our colony. His name is Dion Boucicault, and.he looks upon the matter from Boiei* cauU's^ the showman's,, point j^ewJat, one theatrical manager criticises another, who has a big thing but doesn't know how to bill it. The advance agent, the billposter, is vejy often the man upon whom rests (be onus of a show, and looking upon New Zealand in that light, we certainly are very backward in our advertising. ' In the matter'of natural seUheties we are in advance of all other British colonies. .This is a great point, and one that could be put with advantage. Our South* crn Alps, pur.magnificent lakes, out hot spring* and lakes, famoui alike for beauty and power, could all be utilised as §h~ attraction for those globe trotters, the gorging Midases, Lyou Hunters, and their train of sincere flatterers, who are rapidly reducing this planet to a " place to spend a 'apyy day.' 1 In the colony itself w» have not even a decent guide book, and the tourists who "do" New Zealand generally go away leaving half the sight! unseen. „' *.A It is gratifying -to know that the "national stain" lias been removed, aa vide the wire in reference to theconvietiofc of the editor of Pall Mall Gaiette; although it is possible that some unsophisticated school* boy or simple sarage mifiht ask how it was done. The fact thsjt horrible Crimea have been committed and that lire hnman bodies^ have been traded in has beett proven, the atateme&t that limited liability (what irony!) companies have Iwen and are in existence W grossly immoral purposes, has been tnown to be true, but Messrs Stead and Co.: hat! suffered for the sins of the human race, aod " the entire presa endorse theTverdiet and rejoice at the removal of the natiosMl stain." It is astonishing what boakua we see ia print, and, rf fortiori, kow iM believe it. ■>> - ■ :■■.■:■•.-•■■

. .... ■ #. .^ ..._ ; .#. ..,, # , ; .,. ,# fc '..,. As regards; the justice of the MfiteMeY a good deal of evidence not exactly iaeipt- - able in a court, might be brought forward. Who shall «ay what harm thetelomthion* details hare not done! • Betting aside the idea tbat the affair was a purely basinet! one, got up to stimulate the waning popularity of a paper, and belie?ing in th« pure motires of Mr Stead, waa it not • deplorable experiment to make? It wat, as it were, a raeeiaation, an inoeaiation, of impure matter into a society whioh waa to eventually^ protect that society frott the entire disease. The phytieian haa 3 been clumsy; his operation has failed, the' remedy has proven as bad as the diaease. and he himself is an exemplificatioß of the foolishness—nay. ; the wiokedness—of rashly attempting to suddenly cure a> disease which has grown by degrees.

Speaking of disease! and doctors, 1 am reminded of a little matter which happened a day or twoago at ahospital i*, the Auckland province. At the tine ippointed for the doctor's round, the patienta are all supposed to be on or in their beds. On this occasion, however, two of the patients happened to change beds, onr suffering from rheumatism and the other from consumption. Enter 4he doctor and a professional friend, who undertakes the) examination: "And what is thissMn'e complaint:, Dr—?' said the 'friend, "Consumption," was the reply. The man's chest was bared, the stethoscope applied. "Dear me, dear me, very remarkable, the man's longs are as sound as a bell, surely there is some mistake.'* This roused the hospital doctor's ire, and he in language that requires picking over before publishing, demanded the instrument, and applied it, swearing that he could hear the man's lungs rattling, and that he hadn't ten days to lire. It took some time to convince him of his error, and many of the patients marvelled no longer at their noh recovery.

A paragraph went the round a while ago to the effect that the Maoris pro* phecied a rery hot summer. The noble savage is never remarkable for his lore for truth, and in this instance the tatooed Zadkiel has made an extremely bad shot* Cold as an Icelander's Hades, rain in the ' morning, rain at noon, and at night more rain. One of those truthful books by which the guileless Britisher is induced to throw in his lot with the Maori, obserrei " that the climate of New Zealand is ooec long summer's day," and adds* that " many of the early settlers slept out of doors all the year round.'" Hariog iae wish to be settled early, I hare thought it advisable to buy another pair of blankets for the coming season. .•

We are to be the object of yet Another mission. The irrepressible Mormon is again to angle for souls in our midst, and as fishers of men and women they are unequalled in perseverance at least. The various domestio customs of the globe form an amusing study, if not a very profitable one. LubboeV, in hia "Prehistoric Times," speaks of an intelligent Kandyan chief with whom a traveller, a Mr Bailey, was acquainted, and who, when he heard of monogamy, was " per* fectly scandalise* at the otter barbarism of living with only one wife for life," ! saying it was "just like the wanderqos" I (monkeys). Among the Arabs, too, marriage is for so many days" of the week* commonly four, in the best families, and 1 the wife in the off days is an independent single woman. Look, too, at some of the Japanese people, who, when a child ia born, put the husband to bed and -nurse him carefully while the missus goes on with the work. In Auckland the poor mm often feels inclined to go to bed, bnt it prevented by an absurd marriage custom in vogue in that uncivilised city. Übiqui.

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