Savory Morsels.

Thames Star, Volume XV, Issue 4947, 17 November 1884, Page 2

Savory Morsels.

A QUEER EPITAPH FROM HOO-

SICK PALLS.

The Sun, a few days ago, printed a quaint epitaph. There is one of an eecen* trie character that may be seen on a tombstone at the burying ground near this place. It reads:

"Sufch Sprague, Daughter of Gib urn and Elizabeth Sprßgue. Died June 11, 1846, aged 9 years 4 months and 3 days. She was stolaa from the grave by Roderick E. Clow, dissected at Dr P. M. Armstrong* ogre, in Hoosick, N.F., from which place her mutilated remains were obtaiued and deposited here."

" Her body dissected by fiendish man, Her bones anatomized, Her soul, we trust, has risen to God, Where few physicians rise."

A witty young lady having two suitors, one of whom was an army officer and the other a physician, said it was very difficult to choose between them, as they were both killing fellows.

In an advertisement by a railway com* pany of the sale of some uncalled»for goods, the letter " 1 " had been dropped from the word lawful, and it read: "People to whom these packages are directed, are requested to come forward aud pay Ihe awful charges on the same."

So you want a situation as conductor, do you?" said the president of the road. — "Yea, sir," the applicant replied. '<Kave you the necessary qualification! I for such a responsible position ?"-."lam »ure I have, sir." " Well, suppose yonr train ahoald meet with a serious disaster, in which a number of passengers would be killed and a large amount of property destroyed, what action would you take in such a case?"—"l would telegraph the newspapers that th& accident was of little importance, and then send word to the presidents of the road to sell the stock shoi'fc."' replied the president. '"I,* m a/raid «hose are not the proper qualifications for a good eondactor, bufe you are a man of ability, I see . We want a first-class superintendent. You caE consider engaged as superintendent o# the road at a salary of 10 000 dola. a year."