Savory Morsels.

Thames Star, Volume XV, Issue 4867, 15 August 1884, Page 2

Savory Morsels.

According to the PhotographicNewSi M. de St. Pol Lias, a French traveller in New Zealand^ has recently published the graphy. Thisis how an aboriginal explained the modus o^erandi of the photographer: —"The white man is taking'advantage of our :«pantty.^\W'hißherer'*:he' sees a nice view, he stands still," and looking at it steadily with his big eyes; absorbs the picture inside him, ''making terrible grimaces the while. Tbjsjtt he pats.his head into a bag, and spits out the view upon a glass plate, of which; he carries <« goodly.number.; with hip^ Finally the glass is washed with watery the picture of the landscape remaining behind on the -surface.."..:-.. :.'"/ -_.:^ -.:',,'■',..;-'£i;v-v''V'.'..'... "■ 7-

Bill Barcoo, from the Back Blocks, hip* ing receiVed his cheque, at once resolfed to reduce it to its natural elements of cash, and brandy. Haying: in a manner succeeded in \ that, and with a capital prospect of: JP r TV ahead, lie strolled through the township in search of adventures. Pulling up in front of the - soberlooking Bhop windovf of the undertaker, it occurreditoi ;himthat;,to carry out a funeral wputd'be- a Hreljr dirergitj'frbni the^leajleir dnlnessof the place/ So he staggered into, the shop, and in a' sepulchral Toiee inquired, "What kind of corpse^" -was in stoqlc^K " Coffin, you mean, Bir/^inildly sag||g"ted the tradesman. 8.8. was not tb'tbe trifled with. "Iv wautftnothingipf the sort-—I want wbat I asked," {&c was bent on the fun of>the' funera.l;) advertise on the wiDdowj'-'JBrerj requisite provided for funerals/ and when I ask you fur the very first oner--you ain't got^ it." ;He , wil quickly induced to retire, but he beat his retreat under cprer of-a^drbpping fire ■ of unparliamentary expletires-relies. Mrs SHmdiet---|' I; am goinjf to buy some nice mottoes fo decorate our home. Hare you seen any tbafc yod admire P" Old Eoarder—" Oh, yes, quite a number." Mra Slimdiet--" I am so jjlad, because you^can gire me .some suggestions. Of coursed harea 'Bless Our Home'motto for the front hall, and I also hare some appropriate ones -for the^"parlour; It is tha dininp room -that bothers me." Boarder—*'i>aw ;onevto^day thatwould be just the thuig;"i; Mrs Slimdiet—' Indeed! Where was it ?" Boarder—" In a grocer store," : Mrs Slimdiet—!' That is a queer pi-b»^i.Wbisi^-tai4^!it-;-.i«ay.f|" B *' It said, •If you A«ibii?tl!aee what you want, ask lor it;' '" —Philtdelphia Uali.

A. wise motber«in-Uw meeteth her sonin'law at the door when the new clock: tolleth fourteen, and he essayetb to let himsolf 'into fcheiball bjr unlocking the front gate with his watch key. And foe. this of times he feared her^ 5 She knierii^th:;. his way, and his tricks ire not new to bervr She is-up to all his excuse*, and when he sayeth he was detained down at the bank . until the next morning; or, that the last car had gone* and ho. had to walk; or, that he wag sittiDjf up with a sick friend; or, that he^ was looking v for vhis collar button ;6rV that he was drawn on the juryl^or, that he had joined the nstronomy class ; or, that his books wouldn't balance; ihen doth she on to him with both feet,; for she sayeth withia herself I—"Alt these thiagt hath his father-in«law jaid unto me, for 10, th^e many years. . Lj,, this is also ranity and rexation of spirit." And for this be feareth her yet more and more. ■.•!■• ■••-...■■■..; ■■ ;■ .■-.:■.■;.••■.■;■:;. „.;•■■

An. Australiao native, standing 6ft lOin in his boots, was lately noticed in Ballad":, ■ rat^.;:Tte giant .was /observed,* byVsbgf;!' . active members q{ $o Ballarat battaliolt 7 who wanted to .jenlist himJn the militia. The young; fßHoffi (with; good spirit and" patriotism, said there was nothing he should like better than to■'. take his placo in the defence force., but his nomadic life ■r-"that of a shearer—prevented his doing so. The young fellowi who weighs 163^ and is we'll set up, is a native of Carngbam, and states that he has a gister 6ft high, the others of the family •.u'which he belongs^^ being alsqof wmartablestature. : A young man^ who believes^ in self-im-provement;, having recently got married, suggested to his wife that they should argue some fully and frankly erery inoraing, ia order^ todearn more of each other. The first question happened to be, 'vTFhether a womani'; could be *xv pectcd:to get alonj?^ without ,a hat,", and' he took the affirmative; and when he was last seen he had climbed up into the hay loft and was pulling the ladder after him.