IT WASN'T A MASH.

Thames Star, Volume XIV, Issue 4640, 17 November 1883, Page 4

IT WASN'T A MASH.

Soon after we left Meridian, on the way across to Vicksburg, a solemn looking old chap came into the smoker and groaned and sighed and took on like a man terribly distressed, and when we asked him where he seemed to feel it the worst, he replied: " Gentlemen, there is a powerfully^oodlooking young woman in the next car, and she has fallen into the hands of a human hyena.'*

"No!" shouted three or four voices at once. . i

"Yes, indeed. He's a wicked looking wolf in sheep's clothing. If I mistake not, he represents some New England machinery house. He's a squeezing of her hand, and a whispering of his love, and the giddy thing has fallen right ; into the trap. I couldn't bear to see it any longer, and so I came in here. Gentlemen, some of you have daughters?" Yes, there were three of us who had daughters ranging from two to seven years old, and we were honest enough to admit it. "Just.think of your daughters being kayjoled by a Philistine!" he continued. " He's talking and flattering and promising, and she's somebody's daughter. Gentlemen, something orter be did !"■ We agreed. We alllounged in and saw j that she was a good looking, happy faced j girl of twenty, and we returned and held , an indignation meeting. After a fine dis~ j play of eloquence and oratory it was unanimously agreed that if the masher got off at Jackson, where we were to wait twenty minutes, the good old man should go in and tell that girl what was what. Jackson was finally reached, and sure enough the human hyena got off and ran into the hotel. He was not out of sight when we all enteied the car, and the philanthropist took a seat beside the girl and began: " My dear young lady, my heart is sad —oh !so sad!—for you ! You are on the road to destruction I"- ---" W-what do yoummean!" she faltered. . ' "I mean that the villain who left you a moment ago is seeking to ensnare you." "The v-villain!" , "Yes, ma'am, the wolf in sheep's clothing—the hyena in human form—the scoundrel whose very look proves the vilcness of his heart. I warn you to beware of him as you would of a serpent." " Why, he's—he's- my husband !" she shouted at the top of her voice, and next instant she had her fingers playing through his venerable locks and excavating channels down his wrinkled cheeks,

All of us got away at last, and found hiding.places in the baggage and mail cars' —all but the old man. When he managed to get clear of the bride he slid off the car an' took a bee line up town, and though he met several people while in sight of us, wo couldn't see that he stopped to answer any questions.