BROTHER GARDNER'S FIGURES.

Thames Star, Volume XIV, Issue 4448, 7 April 1883, Page 4

BROTHER GARDNER'S FIGURES.

The spelling ia not according to the dictionary, but :lhe -■ moral; of this arithmetic is" first-rate^ .YDis mawnin", ez I war walkin' out 'mong de sunflowers in de |back yard," 'began. Brother Gardner,-at the last meeting, of the Lime-kiln Club, " Misser Darius Green, de white man, come 'long, an' dere was a powerful sad look on his face ez he leaned ober de fence an' said, ' Misser Gardner, dis sofferin' hez..got....to,come to a cease.' 1 'Hez. you got de shakes and chills?' I axed. ' Wuss dan dat, Misser Gardner. Ize workin' all de long week for ten shillin' a day, and whar de money goes I can't tell. De ole woman wants new clothes, de chillin' wants dis an' dat, de rent runs behin',,andtlze gittin' desperit." " Shoo b now, but let's make some- figgers on de •fence,"-1 tole him. •" Now,- den, you chew 'terbacker ?"( " Yes, I chew 'boat ten cents-worf a day." "Dats 70 cents a week." An' you drink lager ?" ' " Well; of course, I drink a glass now an' den— maybe 15 glasses a week." " Dats 75 cents moah, sah. What d'ye do on Sun* days ? " " Oh, go up to debeer garden." " An' you spec", a dollar at least ? " "I guess so—maybe two of 'em." " Say twelve shillins, an' dat makes two dollars ' . an' ninety-fire cents a week I reckon yon ■ frow away at least free dollars every i week, sal).'' •' Frow it awayl" "Yes, sah. - Dat money would pay your rent an buy your flour." " But a feller must hey some comfort." " De' same, sah. De greatest comfort in the world am to see de rent paid up, de family dressed up, de table loaded-down, an' de ole woman able to go to church. You frow away free dollars every week, sah,. an' den you go roun' cussin' de times, de wedder, an de man who has saved his money." " Gen'lmen, dat white man called me an ole black fool an' a.Hog stealer, but.datdidn't alter de case a bit. He is frowin' away one-third of his. weekly wages, an' den fblowin' roun' dat he's getting desperit an' 'ready to head aTiot. Doan' let me heah any member o' dis club spinniri' dat yarn, kaße if he does dars gwine to be a commitI tee of investigashun, an' dat committee | wbn't whitewash,wurf a cent."—Detriot Free Press.