A PATENT WALTZER.

Thames Star, Volume XIV, Issue 4412, 23 February 1883, Page 4

A PATENT WALTZER.

There is a wide-spread feeling among young ladies, that.no girl can waltz with any comfort unless she is supported by '■ a firm pressure in the region of the waists It .is a mistake to suppose that the _ sex of the person exerting this pressure is of any consequence in, the' mind of the waltzer. ; She "does not care" anything a botit waltzing "with young men—in fact, she does not care any thing about young men In apy circumstances—but she needs to**be sapported in order to be able to waltz. A -^iri'Tigrtu.is.notstrong enough to yield,the desired support," and hence there is no satisfaction in waltzing with other girls. What she .wants is'support, and not a yonng aian,. and if she could obtain the former without the latter, she would be perfectly contented. This opinion has been so forcibly and freely expressed by countless young ladies when reproached wi,th the'alleged, desire, to waltz with the young men, that we cannot have the least doubt that'it is literally and strictly true. Young men when practising the waltz step occasionally clasp a light chair in their right arms, and seem to find a great assistance;^;This shows us that, while-a young man must clasp something to waltz, it is not absolutely necessary that be should clasp a girl. Now, could young j ladies of the Methodist denomination be supplied with some mechanical contrivance 'which would clasp them close around the, 1 waist and yield them that support' which they declare to bo indispensable, they, would undoubtedly be able to waltz as cheerfully as the practising young man with a chair. The invention of " M'Gonegal's Patent Irreproachable Waltzer " meets precisely .. the case that has been supposed, and it is indeed remarkable that it should have been'placed before the public in the very week in which a sermon on the subject was preached. Indeed, one' can hardly help suspecting that the minister was acquainted with and perhaps interested in, the invention, and took an opportunity to aid in its introduction into serious families. Tfee. " irreproachable waltzer " consists of a stout, frapoof light wood of about five j.foet in heighjk and remotely resembling an old-fashiomd it kite frame. At the top of the frame is a padded "rest" for a lady's <faan'd; and at about the middle of the frame is a -jointed arm, capable of being placed round; a young lady's waist and ! securely fastened 1 in that position with a thumb-screw. The 1 frame has two feet; furnished with castors, each one of which has a universal joint, so that it can turn freely in 'apy direction. The whole affair weighs <pnly five pounds, and it is made to fold together, so that a lady can carry.{it,.iniherhand ,either with or without a shawl strap., > When a fair owner, of one of these j frames,,desires.to waltz in a perfectly unobjectionable way, she unfolds her " irreproachable waltzer," clasps its arms around-her waist, and, putting her hand on the'" rest,"'begins to waltz. She finds that the machine, gives perfectly satisfactory 'support to" the back,. and, that it revolves in keeping with the'movement of the waltz with the greatest ease. No one, however fastidious, can claim that ..the I " irreproachable waltzer " is objectionable on the score of morality, and, as it never treads. on. any jjirl'a dress, and never is guilty pf ;losing step, it must, be greatly i preferable in every way to the ordinary young *nao. With the help of this new invention ..waltzingwill be stripped of its present objectionable features, and will, become popular among the strictest Methodists and Presbyterians; It is, to be expected that it will be hailed with'enthusiasm by all young ladies, who .will be, simply delighted to find that they can waliz without the annoying presence of young men, whose only value as waltzersis, according to the best authorities, the support which they give 1 to their partners..