Savory Morsels.

Thames Star, Volume XIV, Issue 4396, 5 February 1883, Page 4

Savory Morsels.

The other day a popular Marton host advertised in Waagaoui for a general

■errant for his house, not 100 miles from the railway station. Application was duly made, and the "want" supplied. The day arrived on which the girl was to enter on her engagement, and she telegraphed' to her employer, asking him to send a conveyance to meet her. Two hours afterwards she received from the indignant

hostess the following message : " A coach and four, page and footman, await your ladyship." The girl read the message, bat declined to accept the stately provision made for her, thinking probably that" servandalism " had. not always the beat of it, after all, A Leadrille preacher is visiting Philadelphia, and some brother clergymen noticing that he did not carry a watch,

asked him how he managed to time himself during his sermons. " Oh, that is simple enough," replied the Leadville apostle. " I keep right on until the reyoivers begin to click, and then I know it is* time to Btop." ' , ' Eioh uncle': "George, what is the colour of your wife's hair?" George: "Black, that beautiful wa»y, glossy, ravea's wibg black, that—" Uncle: '• Ah! quite so, but what is that long fair hair doing on your shoulder then." Stumps of trees are often a great and costly nuisance to the agriculturist and gardeners. An American method of dealing with these troublesome blocks is as follows! In the early winter bore a hole one or two inches in diameter, according to size of the slump, and about Bin deep; put one or two ounces of saltpetre in the hole, and after filling it with water plug it tight. Next spring unplug and pour in a gill of kerosene oil and ignite, j The stump will smoulder away, without blazing, to the extremity of the roots, learing nothing but ashes. ' ! " Troth," said an Irish Councillor at a

committee meeting, "the state of oar road* are a disgrace to the country. Could we not at least put our heads to- • gether and make.*. wooden r pa?ement P " An only child is a Bugle heir occur* renoe. . ;' "la what condition waa the patriarch Job. at the end of his life ?" asked a Sun. day school teaoher of a quiet boy. " Dead," calmly replied the. boy. Women are too imaginative and senaiti?» to ha?e much logic.